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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To use this baby name

80 replies

Lydia335 · 21/12/2018 14:29

I know this has been done to death and no one can really decide but me but I’m so torn.

Baby no 1. I’ve liked a name since I was little. Always said that’s the name we’d use if we have a DD since I met my DH 14 years ago. Whilst pregnant a close family friend has called her DD a name which is sometimes used as a nickname for the name we’ve picked. Literally one letter difference. Think sue and susie or Nicola and Nicole.

We have no other names picked out, If it was one of our boy names that I’ve not been as set on or liked for as long id change it. But this one has been in my heart for so many years!

The friend knows the name has always been my fave and there’s a risk we’d use it - before her baby was born and I knew what they’d picked.

So can I still use it?! We see this family 5/6 times a year (my parents see her parents more often) but are in regular contact on social media/texts. Day guests to our wedding. Live fairly local and some of my friends know her - only to have on social media. Will it be riddiculous having two little girls running around family bbqs and the like called such similar names? And will I offend anyone?!

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 21/12/2018 15:39

I'd still use it. You'll regret it if you don't as you'll just be settling on anything else.

10PollyPockets · 21/12/2018 15:51

I don't get the problem if the names are different!?
Say I gave birth to a Kate I wouldn't care if my friend then used Katie because they are different names!
Also in my dds school there's a class that has 4 kids all with the same name! I think you are over thinking it especially if you've wanted the name for this many years.
It would be a big shame to not use the name if you love it that much

nonetcurtains · 21/12/2018 15:58

When my son was little his school class had eleven boys, seven of them were called Matthew!

BoswellandForshort · 21/12/2018 16:00

I bet it’s Rose and Rosa

RoboticSealpup · 21/12/2018 16:01

Haha. My DH has three cousins with the same name as him!

Ikeameatballs · 21/12/2018 16:03

Just use the name!

rubaduhlo · 21/12/2018 16:04

Please just say the name! It's hardly going to be outing.

saltandvinegarcrisps1 · 21/12/2018 16:04

Sophie and Sophia
Jill and Jilly?
Ann and Annie?
Arse and arsey?
You need to tell us OP or you will be eternally damned!

Soubriquet · 21/12/2018 16:07

If you want to use it, use it

However I don’t get these people who seem to like the same names

There are millions of names out there. Can’t you pick up a baby book and go through to see if there is another name you would like?

blaaake · 21/12/2018 16:12

Just use it... she obviously doesn't care since she named her daughter a similar name to the one she knew you had chosen for yours. If she's arsey about it, she's weird.

3timeslucky · 21/12/2018 16:15

Use it!

starcrossedseahorse · 21/12/2018 16:16

Seriously people should just ignore threads like this where the OP is so precious about being 'outed' that they cannot state the name.

How can anyone answer properly?

Dahlietta · 21/12/2018 16:16

I think if it's quite unusual, then it's not ideal. However, if they really do have very different feels, then it might be okay... Basically, WE NEED TO KNOW WHAT THE NAME IS.

badlydrawnperson · 21/12/2018 16:19

Is it Abcde ?

SirGawain · 21/12/2018 16:23

Get a life OP. You can use any name you like no one owns it. This could only happen on Mumsnet!

Troels · 21/12/2018 16:30

My son has two other cousins with the same name as him (varied by a letter here and there) no one seems to notice. It's not even a family name even though they are all on Dh's side and all in their 20's now.

neveradullmoment99 · 21/12/2018 16:37

em..she knows about it. Its tough if she doesn't like it. Use the name.

Rafflesway · 21/12/2018 16:38

Crikey, names aren't that precious and I think you ma be overthinking this, OP.

When my Dd was born we chose a pretty unusual name. Day after dd was born and we had announced the name another lady on the next floor had a baby girl but hadn't decided upon a name. Midwives - who really like our DD's name - just happened to say in conversation that Mrs. Raffles on Ward X has just had a girl and called her X. Isn't it lovely?

Guess what baby on next floor was called? 😹😹😹

Honestly, OP, so long as both you and DH love the name then just use it.
Your baby is original irrespective of her name.

Mega congrats by the way. I am old now but well jell! 🤢
Bet she's gorgeous!!!

Rafflesway · 21/12/2018 16:39

may not ma!

Thiswayorthatway · 21/12/2018 16:39

Grin badlydrawnperson
abcdef?

SallyWD · 21/12/2018 16:40

I wouldn't think twice and I'd use the name. I really don't see what the problem is.

Lifeofsmiley · 21/12/2018 16:51

I’m the same as sally just use it.

GruffaIo · 21/12/2018 16:51

starcrossedseahorse: Seriously people should just ignore threads like this where the OP is so precious about being 'outed' that they cannot state the name. How can anyone answer properly?

I totally agree.

Knittedfairies · 21/12/2018 16:52

My best friend rang me on the day she gave birth to ask if I’d mind if she gave her son the same name as mine. I sometimes wonder what she would have done if I’d vetoed it. Of course you can use the name OP.

ChesterGreySideboard · 21/12/2018 16:52

Use whatever name you like. It doesn’t matter.
You never know what will happen.
For example, my uncle married a woman with the same name as me.
My friend married a man who has a daughter with the same name as her daughter, and they are the same age and all live together.

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