AIBU to be a bit annoyed?

[gummybearbaby]

I have a friend who helps me out with the school run on school days as my eldest child's school isn't in walking distance. He knows we struggling really hard financially and says he's OK with me just giving him what I can when I can for fuel. As I can only give him about £10 a month I try to make up for it in other ways.....I provide him with 3 meals a day, he drinks an obscene amount of coffee while he is at my house, I allow him to use my WiFi (which I have to have for kids homework and UC) Gallowed him access to my Netflix account (when I can afford to pay it) if we are a fair distance from home and my husband and myself get something for lunch, we never leave him out, same if we buy a coffee or a bottle of pop, if he runs low on tobacco (my parents buy mine) I provide him with some until he can get some, but if I run low he gives me his ashtray from the car and says I can 'have those'. He has openly admitted to 'ripping people off when it comes to asking for fuel money'. I can't ask anybody else as they all either work or don't drive....I'm at a loss as to what I should do or if I'm the one that is being very unreasonable xx

I forgot to add...he is constantly messaging my dad complaining that I haven't paid him enough money for fuel, yet he tells me it's fine not to worry xx

I don't get the relationship. Does this friend live with you? Why are you providing him with 3 meals a day, tobacco, Netflix?

Misses point of thread but you're that skint and your parents buy you tobacco?? Wtf . Give up smoking, be around longer for your kids and provide for them yourself. Can't believe your parents are aiding your cancer stick addiction. I know that's judgemental but honestly when it comes to smoking i am happy to judge.

Negotiate a price with a reputable taxi firm. Much less stressfull and cheaper really!!

How many miles is he driving for you per week? I would try and work out more accurately what you owe him for fuel. Is he taking his own kids at the same time or is this just a favour he does for you?

Given what you buy/give him you’d be better off giving him fuel money and stop subsiding him in other ways.

This sounds like a very full on friendship... he eats at your house every day, three meals a day and messages your dad about you?

Who is this person that he is eating 3 meals a day at your house, and also going out with you and your husband on day trips.

This is all very odd.

Seems like a weird set up. I agree with the comments of find out how much it’d be with a taxi or via the bus if possible? And don’t be beholden to this person, it’s like he wants you always to have the feeling of “you owe me” which is not a good dynamic

What a bizarre post.

He gives you the ashtray out of his car with dog ends for you to smoke? And he drives your son to school?

I'd suggest OP, you explore some thinking skills techniques.

More than a friend if they eat 3 meals a day with you and you trust him to take your child to school? Are any of you working?

Er...this sounds like a really odd dynamic and personally, not one I'm comfortable with (I think the weirdest bit was his offering the dog-ends from his ashtray!).

I wouldn't be 'a bit annoyed', I'd be actively trying to get away from this and find another, more orthodox solution (as one PP has mentioned, perhaps negotiate a contract with a local taxi firm?).

The reason you've posted is because you know this is odd and for once, you appear to have got MN consensus.

Stop eating out and use the money your parents give you for cigarettes for public transport or taxi to get your child to school.

Your in a position now where your stuck in a trap

Are you talking about your brother?

Give up smoking, cancel Netflix, use the money saved to get a taxi for your DC, or work out a bus route, and get the child a bus pass.
Stop being a mug and giving this man meals and free access to your home.

Have you actually calculated how much fuel should cost for that journey 10 times a week?

I’d be surprised if it costs as much as feeding and watering an adult 3 times a day.

Isn’t there a bus or alternative way if getting them to school?

Get rid of Netflix and stop feeding this bloke then you'll have money spare to get your son to school some other way. Are there busses?

Waiting for the drip feed.

3 meals a day costs more than petrol.

And if you’re that skint, time to stop smoking and ask your parents to give you money for essentials instead

Also - if you rely on your parents to buy tobacco, time to cut out lunches out, coffees out and bottles of pop out with your husband, and including him. Your budgeting priorities are totally up the spout.

How the fuck is he even with you on these lunches out?

This can't be a real post.
Astray fag ends.
Parents buying you tobacco.
3 meals a day.
Netflix.
Ridiculous purchases of lunches and soft drinks.

Stop smoking and paying for netflix. Use that cash to pay for a better transport solution.

This doesn't make sense. Who is he and why are you feeding him 3 meals a day along with everything else?

We rarely have lunches out, when we do, it's a pasty or a cheap sandwich... My local taxis aren't reliable, I have exhausted every other avenue surrounding transport and they have all come to a dead end...my husband is about to start a new job, but it is a casual contract, I can't work at the minute due to waiting for an operation on my neck, I am trying to quit smoking, but it isn't that easy.

No, my brother died a couple of years ago