Instant response to scammers...five calls this morning!

[rosepoet]

I have[ successfully] tried loud barking- the phone goes dead immediately. But they are really driving me barking mad. Trying to scam people like me into handing over my banking details is vile. Any advice?

Tell them you have haemorrhoids and are going to have surgery. Tell them what the surgery involves.

Well you don't advice as you didn't hand any details over.
However for those that don't know.
No bank will ever phone you and advise you to move you money.
And under no circumstances whatsoever would they call you and ask for you pin number. I cannot stress that enough.
In fact I don't think the bank would ring you at all. My card was suspended and I was told I had to go into the bank and was told they were querying fraudulent activity on it.
Therefore I had to ring them and answer random questions. The kind of things you wouldn't know unless it was your own account.

I just ask people not to call again and remove me from there call list . Works to a degree

Say just a minute dear, I’ll just turn the stove off, then put the phone on the side and carry on with day. An added bonus is they can’t phone anyone else while waiting for you to come back. Extra points for popping back occasionally to say “shan’t be a minute” thus keeping them holding even longer.

Apparently swearing at them gets you taken off their call list. No idea if this is true. Perhaps you can try it and report back?

I tell them that I won’t be a minute, I will just go get the homeowner/bill payer or whoever they have asked for (even though it is me) and then I just leave the phone off the hook and carry on with whatever I was doing.

I go back and check after 5 minutes and they’ve always hung up by then

Football whistle.

Just say, in your poshest Queen's English, "Sorry, I don't speak English."

Or even better, "Sorry, I don't have a phone."

Confuses them no end!

Just hang up.

No-one gives a shit about barking, loud whistles, toddlers chatting, screaming or telling dad jokes.

The chances of that same person ringing you again, rather than another colleague are relatively slim, so no-one cares.

Register with TPS if you haven't already and that should hopefully cut down on the amount of calls you receive.

They are mostly autodiallers so all the dog whistlers amd whatnots are pointless. Just hang up or unplug your landline. The only people who call my landline are cold callers and my mother.

Swearing doesnt get you taken off the call list

Heavily pregnant and i had lots of calls asking about an accident which wasnt my fault. Told them to fuck off every time (normally polite but was v hormonal and grumpy)

I keep them talking so they dont harrass anyone else more vulnerable. Haven't had a call for a while so maybe I am blacklisted?

I once had a long conversation with one, pretended I was interested for a while, then eventually told him I wasn't. He called me a bitch for wasting his time. Nice.

I had one very persistent one - he refused to take my number off his calling list unless I gave him my postcode, so I just put the phone down on the table and let him blether on to thin air, until he gave up and rang off.

The phone rang again, a few minutes later, and I just felt in my bones that it was him again, so I answered the phone in French, and refused to talk to him in English, until he gave up and rang off again. If he had called back a third time, I would have had to resort to German - or reciting the Welsh national anthem, in conversational tones!

I keep them talking so they dont harrass anyone else more vulnerable. Haven't had a call for a while so maybe I am blacklisted?

That's very noble but unless you kept them talking for their whole 8 to 10 hour shift, then no you didn't and no you're not.

You're just wasting your time.

If you keep them on the phone for 10 minutes that's at least 10 other people they haven't managed to call and possibly scam. It's not a waste of time.

I've got rid of the calls about the accident I was involved.in I told them that it wasn't an accident as I ran them over on purpose because I wanted them dead. It was brilliant as i heard a huge gulp and gasp and the phone went dead and I've never had another call again. I used to get numerous calls daily.

That's brilliant Muddle.

I'm not normally this rude, but had a call one morning when I wasn't having a good time, hadn't slept the night before and was woken shortly after 7am by one of those callers. I believe the phrase "Go fuck yourself from a height" was used.
I've never heard from them since.

I rather enjoy them, I work from home and they provide a bit of an amusing break. I say I don't have a phone, or a computer. Or I have 87 computers, which one exactly has the problem? I have lots of interesting accidents that I explain in detail. Or I try to talk about something completely different, regardless of what they say to me. Or keep braking away to have an (imaginary) conversation with someone else.

The "you've had an accident" ones are the worst.

I get rid of them by saying "yes I did, they said it was my fault but I was only 4 times over the drink drive limit, could have happened to anyone".

I’ve had enough and dealing with a few personal things atm so got zero patience with these people calling me several times a day. I just say ‘fuck off you freaks stop calling me’. Usually does the trick😂

We used to hand them over to DD when she was a toddler and she’d keep them chatting for a while about CBeebies or sweets or something. Quite entertaining.

take a whistle and blow it very loudly down the phone

I start singing 'Gold by Spandau Ballet very loudly down the phone.

.....the number of calls have reduced drastically and I now quite look forward to receiving them.