To think the fiancée of this rapist is deluded...

[IchWill]

metro.co.uk/2018/12/15/musician-raped-heavily-pregnant-woman-tried-protect-unborn-baby-8251289/

Her quotes made my blood boil. Silly woman.

She's standing by that disgusting cretin.

Awwlook, I deliberated about posting in response to your post just now as it's so over-dramatic and actually makes me shudder. I'm a rape victim myself. My spirit isn't broken, thank you very much.

I'm assuming she doesn't believe he did it though and has been wrongly convicted? Hence the standing by him and defence of him. She's hardly the first to do that.

It's not as if she's saying "I know he did it but I don't care coz 'e's fit and gunna be my baby daddy."

At 41, with him looking at serving a min 4.5 years, she's not going to be having his babies unless she's already pregnant. She's not going to be having anyone's babies unless she gets her skates on and stops moping around after him whilst he's inside. Hopefully, she'll see the light sooner rather than later.

Sorry for you experience and sorry that what I said upset you. Believe me that was not my intent. However it does have the potential to kill a persons spirit.
However I do still think rape should carry a life sentence.

What makes my blood boil is the fact that a rapist will be back on the streets in 4 and a half year.

I read about this the other day. I don’t know what bothered me more (other than the horrendous crime itself) this pathetic woman standing by her monster or that 30 odd people showed up to his “farewell, you’re going to jail” party. He’d already been convicted just not sentenced at the time. Fucking grim. Every single one of those guests is as bad as the fiancée.

Awwlook I think in many cases people are unable to comprehend someone they love doing something so bad. They can't imagine or believe it and they can bury their heads in denial.

I probably shouldn't say this but my favourite and closest brother was convicted of child abuse years ago. When I was told about it all I couldn't believe it,I just thought of the brother I loved and knew and didn't want to hear a word of it. That did change, but not so for half my family. Myself, part of me misses the brother I knew (and I think that that's what people hold onto - the person they knew) and I would love to see him BUT that's because I want to look him in the eye and ask him if it's true. I know what I'd learn from doing that and I'd never go near him again, but sometimes you just wonder and think. He totally broke my heart

Rape is akin to murder and nothing will convince me otherwise before anyone tries. After all the victim will only ever be a shadow of her former self. Her spirit is now dead.

This kind of thing is hardly helpful and would not aid the recovery of any rape victim who read it.

this pathetic woman standing by her monster or that 30 odd people showed up to his “farewell, you’re going to jail” party. He’d already been convicted just not sentenced at the time. Fucking grim.

Yes, I agree with the comments about the party. Apparently there were civil servants (colleagues?) there. What a bizarre thing to do - one might expect it of a rapist and his deluded partner/family, but what was everyone else's excuse?

"The HMRC worker, who owns her own car and home, met Carey just before he was interviewed over the rape allegation."

Well she's obviosuly a bit odd then isn't he as she'd only just met him when this happened, not like they'd been married for 20 years or something..

Either that or he is extremely manipulative.

I understand the anger at her comments but I am very disturbed by the idea that what she has done (talking shit) is as bad as what he has done (a violent rape of a heavily pregnant woman). I mean that's just shit. PP believes she should go to prison for 9 years as well presumably as what she has done is "every bit as bad".

Yes I get that it's enraging and upsetting but it's not illegal.

I find comments like this and this thread in general to show double standards and attempt to draw equivalence between a man's violent actions and a woman's words. This happens all the time.

They are NOT equivalent and the majority of the anger needs to be directed at him. She's a diversion taking the heat off him. Put the anger where it belongs.

I mean who gives a fuck what she says.

It's irrelevant and why is so much of the article taken up with it?

The focus here should be on the violent rapist who committed this crime.

I agree too @Awwlookatmybabyspider except your last two sentences. I'm a rape survivor also. I actually think rape is worse than murder as with murder at least you're dead. (My opinion, based on my, and my families experiences).

Her self esteem must be in the gutter if she would stand by that excuse of a human being.

If someone close to me was guilty of such a despicable crime, I would disown them without a second thought.

I have female relatives in my family who have set the bar low when it comes to the people they're involved with (not quite this low). It makes me sad that they can't see that they are worth more than these lowlife men.

I find comments like this and this thread in general to show double standards and attempt to draw equivalence between a man's violent actions and a woman's words. This happens all the time.

They are NOT equivalent and the majority of the anger needs to be directed at him. She's a diversion taking the heat off him. Put the anger where it belongs.

Yup, especially when it's obvious that her stupid self doesn't believe that he did it, rather than she does believe he did it but simply doesn't care.

He is still denying it, after all, and she (stupidly) believes him.

Since when did being a naive idiot make you as bad as a violent rapist? Smacks of the "literal violence" accusations thrown at women on Twitter.

The same people who think she's innocent defend women who let men abuse their children.

Are women helpless children or not? Do we exist in the world able to make a difference or not? If you think women exist in their own right and not as helpless accomplices to the nearest man, you'd be against this behaviour in women too.

"The same people who think she's innocent defend women who let men abuse their children."

What?

Think she is innocent of what? What are you accusing her of?

I dont' know what she's thinking. She could be evil, stupid naive, taken in. I don't care. She is not the "baddy" here. It is HIM. He is the one who violently raped a pregnant woman. Not her.

This is really that thing where when a man does something wrong, society looks around for a woman to blame, isn't it.

No fuck that.

"Do we exist in the world able to make a difference or not?"

What does this even mean?
All women exist in the world to "make a difference"?
I didnt know that.

And the next bit:
"If you think women exist in their own right and not as helpless accomplices to the nearest man, you'd be against this behaviour in women too."

There is no suggestion that she was an accomplice to the rape, is there?

Or do you mean that just by saying what she has said, that makes her an accomplice to the actual crime? How does that work?

I get the anger but direct it at the man FFS or is that just too difficult?

And rape is serious and bad enough without declaring that an unborn baby will have felt terror.

We know that rape is not treated as seriously as it should be, in the minds of many people who don’t understand that rape can happen in a marriage, the minds of the media who continue to talk of ‘child prostitutes’ rather than raped children, by judges who brandish things an so on.

We need to be calm, deadly, resolute and factual in changing this culture.

I have no sympathy for this woman but I do wonder why the paper decided to fill so much column width with stuff that has to be self-deluding at best.

"The same people who think she's innocent defend women who let men abuse their children."

Too many people ONLY attack the women in these situations and do not even cast a glance at the men who are doing the abusing.

What is it with this inability to see men as baddies even when they have done something awful?

The same people who think she's innocent defend women who let men abuse their children.

No. Women who let men abuse their children are entirely something different. Personal experience sadly.

Brandish thongs, not things.

She’ll have absolutely convinced herself he is a victim of the justice system and a nasty woman who’s trying to frame him.

How else could she stay with him?

I know a number of women (3) who are with men who’ve committed crime. It’s never their fault, it didn’t happen like that, or they’re just a cheeky chappy. The women are utterly deluded. One of them has benefited financially from her husbands crime. He only had to give back about 10% of his money and they are still living the high life. She has no shame at all.

I would hope if Gavin was a bad person, I would have seen signs of that by now.

So, the conviction for rapes not enough?.

There are plenty of rapists "on the streets" who've never so much as seen the inside of a police station, so it makes little difference what penalty the minuscule proportion of rapists actually convicted receive.

Mine included. I don't want violence visited upon him though, I want our society and structures to be changed.

I don't particularly disagree with the broken spirit comment, from my own perspective, but I do understand why others object. We can each only speak to our own experiences, none of them are more valid or "worthy". I, for instance, object to people suggesting I'm not trying hard enough to recover because I do relate to a comment about my spirit being broken.

And I think it would be better all round if people stopped clicking on that article just so they can discuss their outrage. As far as the publisher is concerned, the more clicks the more successful it was and the more likely to be repeated.

He is a disgusting cunt, and anyone who supports or excuses him is either morally lacking themselves, or thick as mince.

That poor, poor woman and her baby. I devoutly hope she has a wonderful partner and family to help her through this.

Why - when a woman does something horrendous, do the men in her life get to sit back and carry on life as normal. They would never come into censure for 'stand by your woman' comments in the way that a woman does.

Nonsense, LyingWitch. I can remember similar comments about men who went into relationships with Karen Matthews and Maxine Carr, although it was particularly unfair in Maxine Carr's case. It's just that we don't see it much because women don't commit as much crime, particularly violent and abusive crime.