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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fuck off with your fucking balloons

330 replies

MaryofMislethwaiteManor · 15/12/2018 11:13

Alright, hands up, I’m hungover to fuck from a big party last night (free bar and free food which no one was bloody well eating Hmm) and I have to go to a two year old’s party later (I might eat a very rare burger for lunch to try and get out of that, as last time I did that the world fell out of my bottom Blush)

But I’ve just seen on Facebook that they’re currently in the process of blowing up 500 FIVE HUNDRED balloons to fill the restaurant (yes, the two year old is having their party at 7pm in a restaurant Confused)

WHY? WHY??? Why would you just willy nilly leave 500 balloons floating around to just remain in a horrid wrinkly plastic shape for the next 1000 years, or blow away and just hang on a tree, or smother a bloody I don’t know, marlin in the sea? Why????????? And why would you spend your day blowing up 500 balloons???

Arghhhhhh it’s going to be such a long day.

OP posts:
Mumshotel · 15/12/2018 11:59

Are they not having a second kid because they are single handedly fucking up the environment with all their balloons

sparklepops123 · 15/12/2018 12:01

Take a pin

Flashingbeacon · 15/12/2018 12:03

I would love to go to this party. I basically not a very social person so going anywhere at anytime with anyone is an inconvenience. If I can pretend it’s some kind of modern interactive theatre it’s much more fun. I went to a midsummer party for children that was a play and a nature experience. Came on lashing rain and everyone pretended they weren’t slipping about in mud. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Also great way to meet likeminded folk. The dad st that party who’s face looked like mine is a firm friend.
Don’t try and enjoy it, people who name their kind Macbeth and think they invented paternting instincts will enjoy being observed. Also sesame prawn toast.

LovesLaboursLost · 15/12/2018 12:04

It’s free unlimited Chinese, there’s only going to be one two year-old and he’ll probably be asleep. It sounds alright as a hangover cure.

Original poster
MaryofMislethwaiteManor · 15/12/2018 12:05

I’ve got a rare burger coming with blue cheese in it coming to my flat courtesy of Uber eats. It should sort me out, one way or another.

Seriously when I think of the food I could have had at that party it makes me want to cry. It was all in little bowls. Chicken pie, macaroni cheese....😩

It was a media type affair and no one fucking well eats.

OP posts:
CatsCatsCats11 · 15/12/2018 12:06

Blatantly following for updates on this party Grin

Philomensapie · 15/12/2018 12:07

I kind of did free sleeping, I watched my DC's natural sleep patterns and when they fell asleep most nights became their bedtime. I just woke them up earlier for a week before they started school.

TheSerenDipitY · 15/12/2018 12:07

i hope no one has a latex allergy, i couldnt be there

SagelyNodding · 15/12/2018 12:08

I'm really hoping for live updates to this! (Sorry for your predicament, OP) Grin
And how the fuck can you decide not to have a second kid for environmental reasons, then blow up 500 balloons for a 2 year old?!

Illstartexercisingtomorrow · 15/12/2018 12:09

I need to hear more about these parents’ views on life

Soubriquet · 15/12/2018 12:10

Talk about a stupid comment

“I will only have one child. You know the environment and all that”

Confused
Sethis · 15/12/2018 12:11

Well it could be worse. Could be a balloon release. AKA "Let's celebrate this special event by murdering an unknown quantity of innocent wildlife through suffocation and microplastic"

Figgygal · 15/12/2018 12:16

Oh my they sound like comedy gold from a distance hope you aren't subjected to them too often

That burger sounds amazing by the way

Serialweightwatcher · 15/12/2018 12:17

I hope his little friend isn't called Yorick Sad ... poor kid with odd parents by the sounds of it .. how will anyone sit down in that room with that many balloons floating about?

Serialweightwatcher · 15/12/2018 12:18

Haha just realised that's Hamlet ... losing plot today Grin .. and I did Macbeth for 'o' level but didn't get a very good result (obviously) Confused

IJustLostTheGame · 15/12/2018 12:20

He needs friends called Duncan and Banquo 🤣🤣🤣
So when she was pregnant was she up the MacDuff???

My 2 year old would have lost her shit by 7pm and wouldn't eat chinese food anyway. Although I'd inhale the whole buffet on a hangover.

brizzledrizzle · 15/12/2018 12:26

I actually quite like the name.

SaltedCaramelEverything · 15/12/2018 12:26

Best MN thread in a long time.

You have to go. But first tell us more!! I reckon you’ll make it to classics OP.

Am also creasing at “balloon wankery” from a PP

yumsy · 15/12/2018 12:27

MacBeth is the perfect gender fluid name!!

Flowerpot2005 · 15/12/2018 12:28

OP, I'm sorry but you're taking one for the MN team & ARE going to this party & you WILL post throughout!

I'm chilling the wine in readiness so cooked that bloody burger a bit more Grin

Pinkyponkcustard · 15/12/2018 12:32

@ijustlostthegame wins the thread and has completed Mumsnet with the genius of:

So when she was pregnant was she up the MacDuff???

Efferlunt · 15/12/2018 12:33

Sorry, for clarity, they are only having one child due to environmental issues but are just fine with a vast number of plastic balloons?

anitagreen · 15/12/2018 12:37

I can feel this moving to classics if you continue with updates, we need updates OP throughout this event Grin

corkandwood · 15/12/2018 12:38

I think it's really lovely that a 12 year old is getting along and playing with his two year old neighbour. That warms my heart.

LetsEatOkra · 15/12/2018 12:40

Yes, this has to be moved to classics! I love taking the piss out of people who do things differently to me and laughing at strangers! Grin

Makes me feel so much better about myself.