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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wish nursery opened earlier

164 replies

Alarice · 13/12/2018 15:30

And before anyone says that we need to find a new nursery - they all open at 8.

It's a pain. I really need to be in work before 8, ideally, but as it is, I get in at 8:25 looking and feeling disorganised as hell.

OP posts:
Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 11:14

The nursery is the closest one to school: that's the only reason I can get there on time.

OP posts:
Myshinynewname · 14/12/2018 11:22

I live in a small town up North and all the nurseries here open at 7.30. A couple of them say 8 but actually have an extra session 7.30 til 8 if you ask for it.
A friend of mine needed to leave for work before 7 so she paid one of the nursery staff to collect her child from home and take him to nursery every day for a small fee. It worked really well for both of them. I presume the lady had to have insurance to cover having him in her car.

Thishatisnotmine · 14/12/2018 11:30

We are fortunate to have one that opens 7:30. Loads by us started at 8am though - one did open at 7:30 but wanted an extra £10 a day to get in before 8am!

Our lovely nursery is doing 7am-7pm from next year. I think more nurseries are starting to look at longer hours.

Heratnumber7 · 14/12/2018 11:39

Can either you or your partner change your hours? Eg take it in turns to start/finish an hour later each week.
Most employers are pretty flexible these days, unless there's a good reason not to be.

Heratnumber7 · 14/12/2018 11:40

Or au pair who could drop off and collect for you?

NanooCov · 14/12/2018 13:21

If there are no nurseries available for the times you need, either you or your husband (or both) need to discuss flexible working with your employers. Our nursery is open 7.30 to 18.15. My husband does morning drop off (normally closer to 8) and so is in work a little after 9 but stays later. I get in work early so leave early for pick up.

Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 13:31

Neither of us can work flexibly!

OP posts:
ChristmaspArti · 14/12/2018 13:34

You can't really do flexible working as a teacher though.

Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 13:36

Believe me, I know Grin

OP posts:
User02 · 14/12/2018 13:38

This all sounds like a dreadful stressy situation. I also believe it is very costly.
I didnt have my DCs in that kind of nursery. I just used the usual 2.5 hour afternoon nursery place. I also used another creche in the mornings but each mum had to take a turn of staying for a session on rotation.
I cant imagine the damage this could be doing to people on this constant rush and stress type of life is doing to people. The DCs might have fun and education in the nursery but the staff are not the parents of the children and should not really be the people who spend the most time with the DC.

I do wonder if this way of life can be sustained.

Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 13:39

Huh?

OP posts:
tryinganewname · 14/12/2018 13:55

@User02 the point of this post isn't to discuss if nursery is the right option for children or not (in many cases it's the only option and there's nothing wrong with that).

I'd much rather leave my child with capable and trained professionals who care for them daily than a mother on 'rotation' at a crèche just to save on hours spent in nursery. Surely they don't have the capacity to look after several children at once and a crèche isn't exactly providing them with educational activity, what about naps and snacks also?

tigwig76 · 14/12/2018 14:31

To reply to whoever asked me why it was insulting it's because if I was asked to look after a baby from 7.30am to 8am for example, not only would this prevent me from taking on a child who might want to start at that time then I would have to say no as the 30 min child would take up the space. Then potentially lose out a days space for 30 mins.
I would never do that as if I'm asked to have child for 30 mins why not have them all day and scrap the nursery? It's disruptive to do nursery/school runs and involves taking other children in your care out too.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 14/12/2018 14:55

Yes, if I’m not good enough to be chosen as your childcare provider, why would I step in and help you out when I’m last resort? Plus being out at 8am means I won’t be here to accept my usual children.

dinnafashsassenach · 14/12/2018 15:03

Our nursery is open from 07.00 to 19.00 every day (not that I leave my children there that long, of course). Costs an absolute fortune to pay for that extra piece of mind though Bear

icannotremember · 14/12/2018 15:16

To reply to whoever asked me why it was insulting it's because if I was asked to look after a baby from 7.30am to 8am for example, not only would this prevent me from taking on a child who might want to start at that time then I would have to say no as the 30 min child would take up the space. Then potentially lose out a days space for 30 mins.
How is that insulting? You're asked, you say 'no'. I know a number of childminders who have children on their books solely for drop offs and pick ups. It's not insulting to be asked whether you offer a service.

Yes, if I’m not good enough to be chosen as your childcare provider, why would I step in and help you out when I’m last resort? Plus being out at 8am means I won’t be here to accept my usual children.
So you say 'no', when asked. It's a very unprofessional and immature attitude, the whole "if I'm not good enough for full time..." thing.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 14/12/2018 15:37

Yes we do provide drop offs and pick ups to schools and preschool session but not for full days at another provider! Of course that’s insulting. You don’t get to decide what we find insulting or not and I don’t care if you think that’s unprofessional or not.

Youngandfree · 14/12/2018 15:47

@Alarice why so early? What time does school start?

User02 · 14/12/2018 18:00

@Tryinganewname - I apparently did not make things clear enough, My DC went to the normal council nursery which at that time was about 2.5 hours morning or afternoon. The creche was a specialist place. There was trained staff but as a back up one parent took a turn of staying at every session. The creche was the gentle start to a certain education type which was very succesful.
Those was my nursery choice.
What I see from the posts here is that getting child to nursery and then parent to work, working a full day and then back in time to pick up child. A day's work is usually enough or more to tire a person. The stress of the dash to nursery and then to work and the reverse at the end of the working day seems an awful lot of stress.
Then there is the cost in monetary terms, and the cost of living with the constant stress of always have to watch the clock to drop off and pick up child is a cost on the health of parent(s). This week I have seen a 30 -35 year old parent struck down with a stroke. I had health problems with my stress on getting DC to school and then me to work. My situation was not as stressful as some if the PPs have stated.
I am just saying is it all really worth it? It is horrible to be stuck in traffic scared you wont get there on time when a DC is involved. Rushing around at speed is not good for either DC or parent. Constant pressure is not healthy. The finance is another pressure. All these pressures are not good.
What about another option such as working part time or being a SAHP? It seems a lot of risky pressure when there is the option of not working or being part time.
I speak as someone who fell foul of the constant dashing trying to be the perfect mum and worker when really I was spreading myself too thin. If I had died, perhaps my DC would have missed me but the company I worked for would have replaced me without breaking step

Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 18:10

Working part time or staying at home - bet no one ever thought of that

OP posts:
Notmorewashing · 14/12/2018 18:27

@User02 how ignorant. Are you volunteering to pay for us mums who cannot afford to not work in order to give our children a good life then ????

tigwig76 · 14/12/2018 18:47

Icannotremember I have been asked before and indeed have said no! Insulting is my opinion of it. The point I'm trying to get across is I am a fully qualified and very experienced childcare provider. I open at 7.30am and most children arrive before 8am. If I were to take on a baby/toddler for 30mins only to drop them off at a nursery it would prevent me from being available to the children who wanted to arrive whilst I was out. And I would have to take children in my care out with me. And what for?! 1 hours fee? Absolutely not worth it and would block me from taking on another child whose parents are happy to pay for all day.
When you say you know others who are happy to do this are you not confusing normal nursery/school runs with children aged 3 and over as that is entirely different to taking a baby to another childcare provider. I know about 30 other minders and never would any of them do that for the same reasons I've already said.

combatbarbie · 14/12/2018 19:33

Why is DH not picking up some of the slack..... you both need to be at work for 8....you take it in turns?

Original poster
Alarice · 14/12/2018 19:57

He works way over the other side of town. He'd never get to work on time if he dropped the kids off.

OP posts:
highheelsandbobblehats · 14/12/2018 20:12

I used to work in a hospital nursery and we opened at 7.15 as shifts changed at 7.30. we did have a strict rules that any child who started at 7.15 had to be collected by 4pm so that they didn't have a long day. We were open to the public (limited spaces).
One of our children lived 30 miles away, but because mum worked at the hospital, she did the commute with her on the days she was in, so that she spent less time in nursery. Whilst that's a whopping commute for a little, one, if you have one closer to work, would that work? Or have a member of staff looking to earn some extra money come to you in the morning and have your DC until it's time to go to work? A member of staff at my DS1s nursery did wraparound care for one of the children there.
Alternatively, do you know any of the other parents? Would they be willing to have your DC dropped off at their house and then take them in?

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