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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel absolutely sick to my stomach about this story

87 replies

MissyCooper · 12/12/2018 22:55

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-46535996

Clearly I’m not unreasonable. I can completely see how this could happen.

What they can do to prevent it happening again, in a time of staff shortages and pressures...I can’t answer that.

That poor, poor woman and her poor family.

OP posts:

KonekoBasu · 14/12/2018 00:50

"I begged for a private room as DD was 2 weeks old"

I had to go back in for a week or so and got a private room because as my baby had left the hospital we weren't allowed back on the ward. That was ok, plenty of other complaints though, as others have pointed out, once the baby is out you're nothing.

maddening · 14/12/2018 01:03

It wouldn't have to be a nurse - porters could easily pick up and drop off between neonatal and maternity

Pandamodium · 14/12/2018 01:09

I've had three premature babies this story is so sad but doesn't surprise me in the slightest.

My first son didn't make it (24 weeker) I self discharged 15 hours post section when I was told I would have to go on a bay with mothers and new babies.

I've seen a few mams faint in neonatal.

SnuggyBuggy · 14/12/2018 06:57

These are such grim stories.

smiler0206 · 14/12/2018 07:47

It is just awful. How the hell did she not get found for 5 hours 😡😡in any hospital I have ever been to there is always somebody about in every corridor day and night. Tbh that short time after birth she should have been chaperones to see her baby anyway. Poor woman

Hoppinggreen · 14/12/2018 07:58

Poor lady, my heart goes out to her family
I think the problem is that once the baby is born all the focus is on them, they become the patient and the Mum is just supposed to look after it with very little care for themselves
My MW were lovely both times I had my babies but once they were born it was as if someone had flicked a switch and nobody was very interested in my health anymore

marvellousnightforamooncup · 14/12/2018 08:34

I think NHS postnatal wards have a very toxic, hands-off culture where women are expected to get on with the business of caring for their newborns regardless of how difficult their births have been, whether they’ve suffered tears and/or instrumental deliveries, whether they’ve had surgery, whether they haven’t slept a wink in three days... Women who struggle and ask for help are sneered at or ignored (I’ve seen it - I’ve lived it). Once the birth is over, the health and well-being of the mother is considered secondary to the health of the baby. Even women who post on MN about bad birth experiences get responses along the lines of “Be grateful that your baby is OK”. Mothers matter too.

I couldn't agree more with this. It was definitely my experience with my first. I could hardly move post section and was stuck half on and half off the bed all night. Nobody came to see me. I was stupidly in a private room on my midwife's advice. DH refused to leave the hospital for the remainder of my stay and slept on the floor.

I had my second baby at ERI and the care I experienced was perfect.

WaitingWatching · 14/12/2018 08:52

marvellous, after my experience of hospitals I am glad I have never been in a private room. Yes wards can be noisy but in their favour therr are other patients to speak up for you or just pass you a drink.

AgentCooper · 14/12/2018 10:24

Poor, poor woman. This story has been on my mind since I read it a few days ago. Post partum care is awful. I was in for a week with poorly DS last year and my mum was actually shocked at how much worse it was than when she had me in a different hospital, same city, 30 years ago. My bay had a fucking sink in it that everyone was coming in to use at all hours. The staff themselves were for the most part such kind and lovely people but the facilities were really poor, in stark contrast to the pristine new areas that had just been built.

Thinking of her husband and wee boy.

CheshireChat · 14/12/2018 14:37

Sad bit is, pretty much everyone here suspects poor post natal care, rather than any other Aussies so that rather points at it being painfully usual.

Food is brought to you at my hospital which is good, but you're expected to eat straight away which isn't actually that simple with a BF newborn and trying to get to grips with everything.

GrannyJillS · 14/12/2018 14:39

Why put it in AIBU though?m

CrookedMe · 14/12/2018 15:04

This is such a small incident, but when a MW gave me a (painful) injection in my thigh post-birth, it was a shock, as she didn't tell me she was going to do it.

I cried out in pain, and she sneered at me and laughed.

On what other ward that day do you think a patient was in pain and laughed at? None. But her attitude was 'you just had a baby and you're moaning about an injection?

This poor woman, and family.

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