To think dp is taking the piss?

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I’ve been with my dp for nearly a year, his birthday was two weeks ago and he asked me for a £40 shirt, I bought him it. He then took it from my house (we don’t live together) without telling me so he could wear it on a night out which I was pissed off about, he was supposed to spend the night of his birthday with me, he never showed up and went out and got drunk instead.

Fast forward to now, it’s my birthday this Thursday, he was supposed to spend the night with me. We got into a bit of a disagreement on Sunday and he throws in my face that he’s going away to London the day before my birthday and won’t be back for ten days, he never told me he was going before that, didn’t mention it at all. During the argument I told him to just take my present back and not bother, he proceeds to go on that he can’t take it back and he’ll have lost £50 if I don’t take it.

I’ve hardly spoken to him since he told me he was going away, so last night he dropped my birthday present off, didn’t bother to wrap it or anything, tied up in the bag it was delivered in, price tag still on £25 reduced to £15. He’s not skint, has a job and lives at home, pays no bills. I wasn’t expecting the world, I know it’s not about the money but for him to say one things and do another yet again is just like the straw that snapped the camels back after everything else the last couple of weeks.

He thinks it’s okay to ditch me on his birthday because, well, it’s his birthday! He tried to pass the going away off as he has to work away, he doesn’t, he gets the choice to work away now and then if he wishes and hadn’t bothered to up until now after promising to spend the night with me.

AIBU to be totally pissed off about the whole thing?

How old is he? 18?

Seriously, get rid. He is a selfish, using fecker.

Yeah, I would be pissed off too. Is this a long term relationship? Sounds like you are putting in a lot more effort than he is. It doesn't sound as though he values you properly.

He sounds like a dick, but I don't get the first issue with the shirt?

Sounds like he caused an argument to enable his trip to London. He sounds massively selfish and immature

He sounds very young, immature and expects you to spend your money to allow him what he wants, but won't do the same for you. Get rid, guys like this suck everything out of you.

Take it back!! Swop it for something of your choice.
And wear it while out looking for a new dp!!
He is a shit one!!

Sounds dramatic cut him loose

You really need all of mumsnet to tell you to dump this complete twat? You don't know this already?

The first issue with the shirt was that I had it at my house to give to him on his birthday, he took it before then one day while he had been here and didn't tell me, I had been planning to give it to him on his birthday. The day before his birthday I was getting his birthday stuff sorted and it was gone, cards still there though

Sounds like he's doing it so you'll be the dumper.

Yep, I think he wants out but wants you to do it so is behaving like a complete fuckwit.

He doesn't care about you. He is making that absolutely clear by his actions. His words are irrelevant. Dump him and find someone who does care about you.

He doesn't want me to dump him, I told him how I felt about it and that I thought it seemed that way too, he's now offering a weekend away after Xmas to make up for it. Everything has been fine up until now but I'm just not so sure any good can come of the relationship after the way he's acted.

The obvious question is why are you with him and putting up with this?

Well then he's just a selfish idiot.

Dump him and enjoy your night as a single girl.

he sounds like my uncle spent years doing this to avoid buying decent birthday and the Christmas gifts for gf's...you make some nice birthday plans for yourself and do nothing more far as he's concerned, really he's not making you happy or adding anything positive to your life

Who cares if he wants you to dump him or not? You still should. Surely you envisaged better than this when you saw yourself partnered up with a man?

Can't fathom the disrespect you're being shown here. I'm sorry this has only come out after what I assume was a decent year together, but this is honestly pathetic. You can and should do better.

Bloody hell he's showing you how unimportant you are to him. If you are in a relationship and you care about each other there shouldn't be this drama . Give yourself an early Christmas present and dump his arse.

Raise your standards and get rid. He has just demonstrated his total lack of interest.

Asked you for a £40 shirt and in return you got a discounted something or other tied up in its bag. This alone is enough, yuk.

If you're willing to tolerate this treatment and stay with him because HE doesn't want to break up, then stop complaining. If you're satisfied being taken for a mug then just get on with it.

Honestly OP get him to fuck and find someone who has a semblance of respect for you.

I am assuming you are very young?

Get rid of him. He is not worth a nano second of your time.

Golly op!

Do you not have high expectations of how a man should treat you?

My dh has always remembered my birthday, made it very special, beautiful thoughtful presents, surprise weekends away for 24 years!

Do you not want this kind of lovely treatment from the special man in your life?

You seem not to be high up in your bf's list of priorities. He prefers not to be with you for special days.

I would be heartbroken and humiliated if a man treated me like you've been treated. He wouldn't be my bf. End of.

Sad you fall for low life op. Your life would be so much happier if you didn't.