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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find this petty?

43 replies

Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 22:09

It's a good friends 30th birthday (Louise). Louise's friend Sue is arranging a weekend away as a surprise for Louise's 30th birthday. I only know Sue through Louise.
Sue finds a holiday house to rent and books it before asking anyone, it is a set price at £5000 for the weekend and sleeps up to 20 people.
14 friends of Louise are going. Of those 14 myself and one other person only want to do one night due to childcare arrangements and cost.
Myself and the other person ask to pay the equivalent of 1 person between us and stay just one night.
Sue says no, if we do one night we'll have to stay in a local hotel as the house is rented for 2 nights.
AIBU to think this is petty? It will bring down the overall cost for everyone else if we pay for one night plus there are plenty of spare beds to go round.
I want to say I'm not going at all now but Louise is a good friend.

OP posts:
CrispbuttyNo1 · 11/12/2018 22:12

Petty and ridiculous.

MoistCantaloupe · 11/12/2018 22:15

Surley birthday girl will find it odd when you’re both bundled off in a cab. Doesn’t seem like she really thinking about her friend at all.

AtrociousCircumstance · 11/12/2018 22:16

She’s an idiot.

AtrociousCircumstance · 11/12/2018 22:16

She’s just trying to pressurise you into staying and paying for two nights.

InDubiousBattle · 11/12/2018 22:17

Very petty. Cutting her nose off to spite her face.

M4J4 · 11/12/2018 22:18

That is quite petty.

So there's now 12 of them and they're paying £416 each? Or are they paying for birthday girl as well so £454 each?

Original poster
Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 22:21

We were all going to split the birthday girls cost evenly between us, which I'm happy to do.

OP posts:
GreenTulips · 11/12/2018 22:22

£5000 for a weekend? Is it Buckingham Palace?

IchWill · 11/12/2018 22:24

Sue's a cunt.

And goodnight. WinkFlowers

Original poster
Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 22:24

£5000 for a weekend? Is it Buckingham Palace?
I should hope so, apparently it's 'themed'. Wink

OP posts:
itsalmostfriday · 11/12/2018 22:25

Yanbu
Sue is a dick

VictoryOrValhalla · 11/12/2018 22:26

Sue is a knob. Ignore her, turn up at the booked house, pay your share for one night and she’s can do fuck all about it.

Hwory · 11/12/2018 22:32

£416 PP for a mates birthday 🤔🤬😨

Twickerhun · 11/12/2018 22:34

Is the one of those places that sleeps up to x people if you include the dogs bed and pull out beds on every inch of floor? Some sleeps up to figures are really optimistic.

Punta · 11/12/2018 22:34

Expensive for two nights! Sounds like she’s booked it without checking and getting heebiejeebies about the cost.

Original poster
Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 22:41

It is very expensive and although affordable I could think of much better things to spend £££ on.
Plus it falls on a weekend that DH is away so it would mean me leaving 2 and 5 year old DC with (capable) grandparents which I think might be a bit much for all of them.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 22:44

Is the one of those places that sleeps up to x people if you include the dogs bed and pull out beds on every inch of floor? Some sleeps up to figures are really optimistic.
No, it has a ridiculous amount of bedrooms and 20 actual beds.
I'd probably be more at home on the pull out bed though. Grin

OP posts:
ThistleAmore · 11/12/2018 22:46

I cannot think of a single friend of mine for whom I would be willing to splash out £500 for a weekend away, and I have some pretty good friends.

Fortunately, none of my friends would expect me to waste such an outrageous sum of money on two nights in a big hoose either.

I would suggest that you tell 'Sue', as politely as you deem necessary, to fuck off. I would be HORRIFIED to find that a friend had decided to do something like that on my behalf, affordable for most or no.

MereDintofPandiculation · 11/12/2018 22:49

So you were offering to stay 1 night each and pay £384 between you (if paying for birthday girl?). But Sue wants you to stay elsewhere, so there's only 12 people sharing the £5000 bringing it up to £417? I'd leap at the chance if I were you - even allowing for the taxi, you could find a decent hotel for less than you were offering to pay.

RitaTheBeater · 11/12/2018 22:51

Me too. I'd say 'good plan' and make plans to sleep elsewhere for the one night.

Leeds2 · 11/12/2018 22:55

I would politely decline the invitation, and stay at home.

Explain why you have done so to Louise afterwards, if the topic arises in conversation.

MrsFezziwig · 11/12/2018 23:02

I could maybe see Sue’s point if she had filled the house and you would be preventing another person from staying two nights, but that’s obviously not the case if a smaller number is involved. I’d find a cheap hotel & then wait for her to come crawling back when she finds that she has caused the price for everyone else to increase.

Original poster
Dutchesss · 11/12/2018 23:03

So you were offering to stay 1 night each and pay £384 between you (if paying for birthday girl?). But Sue wants you to stay elsewhere, so there's only 12 people sharing the £5000 bringing it up to £417? I'd leap at the chance if I were you - even allowing for the taxi, you could find a decent hotel for less than you were offering to pay.
The thought did cross my mind,(especially having to see Sue explain it to Louise) however there's activities and a hot tub in the house so I imagine a lot of time will be spent there before going out in the evening. I think I'd rather not go at all. There were 18 friends who agreed on a date before Sue booked the house, now 4 have had 'something come up'.

OP posts:
shpoot · 11/12/2018 23:06

I can see sues point of view. If she agrees to one night for you at half price then others will follow suit and suddenly not be able to make the second night.

4 have already dropped out completely.

She was an idiot for booking without checking and now she's panicking!

GreenTulips · 11/12/2018 23:07

Not sure why people book these places because it always become a tug over money - fine on a set price but fluxtatingvwill make it undoable for others as numbers fall

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