To ask you to tell me something funny

[Merename]

Anything you like. I’ve had a meh weekend of no sleep and grumpiness and need some good MN laughs please.

Just got the inch high knees...that’s properly 😁.

Yep, as @Bringbackbertha said, Boswell was just a stupid pretend 'joke' designed to irritate and never come to a conclusion.

It was a bit like when the school bully keeps trying (with complicit sidekicks playing along) to convince you that there's something embarrassing on your back and believing it to be top comedy seeing you looking panicked and flailing your arms around to no avail.

Really, don't waste your time.

DD was about 10 and we were having the conversation about where babies come from. She sat there looking puzzled and asked how they came out of such a small space. As I was about to answer she suddenly smiled and said - "Oh I suppose they come out in pieces and then you have to put them together." I didn't laugh for which I think I deserve the mummy of the year medal....

Purple

Last year I was in a shop when a SIkh man came in and walked past a woman with a pair of identical twins - one saw him and shouted 'There's the genie!' and his twin replied 'can we rub his lamp?' The poor Mum couldn't get out of the shop quick enough. The Sikh man couldn't stop laughing after she'd gone.

Charlie Mullins OBE posted this on Twitter with the caption 'Did somebody call a taxi for Theresa May?'

A battery and a moustache walk into a bar.
' get out now' said the barman
' why?'
' well, your off your face and you look like your going to start something that's why!'

Properly LOLed at some of these.
Heard this one the other day ...

Knock knock
Who's there?
Centipede
Centipede who?
Centipede on the Christmas tree

Oh Santa

After my son asked me where the iPad was for the hundredth time I muttered ' Christ knows ' ...." well why don't you ask HIM then?"
DS is 5 and takes everything literally!