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AIBU?

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Original poster

To remind everyone to hold their children's hands

118 replies

littlemisscomper · 08/12/2018 20:23

TIGHTLY around roads.

www.facebook.com/chris.leigh.adi/videos/2221828591393207/UzpfSTEwMDAwMDU2NTA0NjA2ODoyNDQ1MjkyNTQ1NDk5NTU2/

Even if you think they're mature enough to walk along without, they can really take you by surprise. Once I was walking through town with the little ones I nanny for. They were around 4 and 6 at the time. The little girl dropped some crappy leaflet she'd picked up at the library, pulled her hand out of mine and dove after it - straight in front of a car!! Thank goodness it stopped in time. When I exclaimed that she could have been run over her older brother defended her with 'But if she hadn't the LEAFLET would have been run over!'

I hate seeing young children walking independently, or using scooters or bikes along pavements. They just don't have the road sense. It's not worth the risk.

OP posts:
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 08/12/2018 20:26

I agree with you; it seems dense to have to remind folk and I’m not watching that vid as it confirms all my worst fears.

DD is a bolter and I feel embarrassed ferrying her round in a pram at her age (2.9) but I also have a 14 months old DS and her history of bolting and messing about means his safety has been compromised before.

We also use reins on her as well as a Little Life backpack.

One day I know she’s gonna be fine and she sort of “gets” cars are dangerous but I can’t trust her yet - period

Stormwhale · 08/12/2018 20:30

That video is terrifying, thank goodness the child is ok. I still hold 5 year old dds hand even though she doesn't want me to. She is so sensible, but it only takes one stupid decision and I could lose her.

BertieBotts · 08/12/2018 20:32

DS1 is ten now and regularly crosses roads by himself so I don't hold his hand any more. But when he was little I used go let him hold my finger and have my other fingers/thumb around his wrist just in case of a bolt, it always made me feel safer.

Also we had regular discussions and reminders about how if something falls/blows into the road, never ever to go into the road to get it but to wait for a grownup to get it back for you. Because you're absolutely right, children don't really understand prioritising and they wouldn't see the difference in seriousness between something like a leaflet getting lost and run over, vs getting injured or killed themselves. They can't process it because it's too abstract a concept.

BertieBotts · 08/12/2018 20:34

And YY absolutely imperative to realise that you cannot trust their judgement 100% even when they are fine most of the time. Children's Impulse control and judgement of a situation simply isn't anywhere near what an adult's would be.

Wolfiefan · 08/12/2018 20:36

The other week I slowly came round a corner in a car park. Three adults with a young child but no one had hold of him. He dashed out right in front of me. Thankfully I was crawling and stopped in plenty of time. But it scared the living fuck out of me. I kept imagining his head hitting the bonnet. So awful.

FascinatingCarrot · 08/12/2018 20:37

I still grab hold of the 19yr old ds arm out of sheer habit. Ridiculous but Ive always had a massive fear of my kids near the road.

megletthesecond · 08/12/2018 20:38

Yanbu.
I get the rage when I'll see kids free walking or scooting next to roads.

Snowwontbelong · 08/12/2018 20:40

Once at a crossing with a very sensible dd (under school age), she started to cross on the red man, because the lady next to us did!!
Always drum the green man into the dc - even make teen ds wait with us!!
Although stats show dc who never cross without a crossing are actually more likely to be knocked down when the time comes to cross unaided as their judgement isn't as good as jay walkers!!
Confused

Soubriquet · 08/12/2018 20:42

Jeez that is one lucky kid

Especially since he narrowly missed the other car going by

Lovemusic33 · 08/12/2018 20:45

My friends little girl was hit when she was just 3 years old, she was running along the pavement and stepped off, her leg was broken in many places, she was lucky.

ChasedByBees · 08/12/2018 20:48

What is the video? I don’t like watching videos without at the very least a brief description.

BlackeyedGruesome · 08/12/2018 20:53

Yep. Had a kid dash out in front of me from between the legs of a group of people waiting to cross the road to school. Was going extra slow that day so stopped in time. Kid was lucky.

AntMoon · 08/12/2018 20:54

Genuine question - why do young kids want to bolt across the road?

GingerInAJam · 08/12/2018 20:54

Yes, and please do not be embarrassed to use reins. They are a very useful invention and there's nothing wrong with using them to keep a child safe.

I'll never forget seeing a woman on the opposite side of the road to me, walking along with her baby in the pram and her two year old walking alongside her. She was checking her phone for a second and was distracted when her two year old ran across the road, and was narrowly missed by a car. She instinctively let go of the pram to run after him and as the road was sloped the pram continued into the road and tipped over. Thankfully the baby was fine, but the poor Mother probably aged twenty years in twenty seconds

cheesemongery · 08/12/2018 20:55

I still grab hold of the 19yr old ds arm out of sheer habit. Ridiculous but Ive always had a massive fear of my kids near the road.

I do with 21 yr old DS!

It was slightly odd when I went to grab bosses hand over the traffic lights though!

Original poster
littlemisscomper · 08/12/2018 20:55

@ChasedByBees

It's dash cam footage from a driving instructors car. A young child runs into the road at a crossing.

OP posts:
Soubriquet · 08/12/2018 20:55

Chased by

It’s a learner driver driving along when a kid suddenly dashes out I front of the car and the learner couldn’t stop in time.

To make matters worse, he flew in the path of another on coming car and narrowly misses being ran over by it

nokidshere · 08/12/2018 20:56

I've spent years reminding people about this. But I'm mostly met with "but my child knows how to behave near a rd" or "she never runs off" or "he knows there will be consequences if he leaves my side", "my child is very bright", "they would never do that". Even when I've said it on here Ive been shot down with the above excuses on many occasions.

Children are unpredictable. Just because they dont do something doesn't mean they wont do that thing. Children under 10 do not understand the consequences of their impulses. Children are not mature enough to remember the rules they have been told because they are impulsive. The sooner parents stop comparing a child's brain to an adult one the safer they will be.

OddBoots · 08/12/2018 20:56

ChasedByBees - dash cam footage of a child running in front of a learner driver too fast for the driver and instructor to stop then nearly being hit by a car coming the other way. The child is fine but could easily not have been.

BlackeyedGruesome · 08/12/2018 20:59

Last 15 seconds toddler runs out at a crossing and is hit by the car. Cartwheels in air. Lands in road inches from the path of another car. Kid gets up and runs off. Filmed from dash cam

Original poster
littlemisscomper · 08/12/2018 21:02

@AntMoon

I did it myself when I was around 6, so old enough to be expected not to, if you follow me! It was totally and utterly random. Just ran straight out into a main road at rush hour. I remember being upset and confused by my mum totally losing it with me as that felt like an unfair reaction! It scared her so much she held my hand for the next 5 years!!

Young children just don't have a concept of what could happen. They live in the moment and if in that moment they think sprinting out into a dual carriage way would be fun/a way to get where they're going quicker/a demonstration of independence then they will without thought of possible consequences.

OP posts:
SnuggyBuggy · 08/12/2018 21:04

@FascinatingCarrot, I thought my DM was the only one who did that Grin

I think it's important to remember kids aren't mini adults, they see the world differently in many ways and aren't always aware of danger

PFB1 · 08/12/2018 21:04

I had an incident with 5yo DD last week. I felt so sorry for the driver. It was about 5.30pm but pitch black. We were walking along a path which meets a relatively quiet road. DD was walking right next to me but at the last minute made a run for it as she wanted to get to the end of the path first (just where the path meets the road). A car was driving down that road at about 30mph and luckily spotted her running towards the road and did an emergency stop. She didn't run into the road and it wasn't her intention to. But neither me nor the driver knew that at the time! It was a scary moment.

GingerInAJam · 08/12/2018 21:05

It's amazing how many people don't watch them in shopping centres either. I don't mean a few seconds looking away which can happen to anyone. I think that most parents have lost their kids momentarily, even just for seconds but some seem completely oblivious letting them run way ahead. Recently I had to say politely say something to a couple because they were having lunch in the food court and their three year old girl was two tables back playing having finished her lunch. She was climbing up on a chair and pulling herself onto the barrier which had a 30ft + drop below and nothing but thin air between her and the solid ground.

carly2803 · 08/12/2018 21:07

I grab my mums arm now - shes too busy talking to me by the road... normally grab her and scould her lol
how times have changed!!

she was there for me! right back at her :)

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