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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To raise a formal complaint regarding school isolation

664 replies

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 07/12/2018 19:13

Last week a group of 20-30 kids were throwing acorns at each other in the school playing field, a child who also throwing the acorns, got hit in the eye which I've been led to believe required medical treatment, teacher asked who hit the child and DS said he believed it was his acorn, and that he was sorry, and did not mean to cause anyone harm.

He was given a days isolation plus after school detention, however on the day with only 10 mins notice.

His head of year called and said as he admitted it was him, they had no choice to follow the isolation process, however admitted they thought it was harsh, however rules and rules which we will adhere to and support the school with.

DS has NEVER been in isolation.

My AIBU is, Ds was made to sit in a 2 by 4 booth, being made to sit upright and face a white wall for the whole of the school day. NO SCHOOL WORK WAS GIVEN AT ALL

He could not tell the supervisor he had no course work as he isn't allowed to talk while in isolation, and tbh nor should even have to ask for course work, its the supervisors role to ensure DS has course work, which is the policy in DS school.

Only one teacher called the isolation supervisor to ask if DS was present, however did not send course work, not one of his other 4 teachers called to ask if he was present.

The isolation supervisor has confirmed all of the above is true Hmm his HOY has advised us that they have passed it on to the isolation manager who will be calling me, however even after chasing it up everyday for the past week and leaving messages for them to call me I am still awaiting the phone call.

My own DS ended up requiring medical treatment as he endured a headache with sickness and sensitivity to light, ds has never had a migraine before isolation, which the A&E doctors advised was the cause.

OP posts:
Mynydd · 07/12/2018 22:43

So many teachers are quick to defend ineffective, draconian punishments because they haven't got the time to manage the situation effectively. I.e., I don't get a chance to check my emails, I don't get a chance to pee, I can't manage your son's isolation course work.

This may be the case, but it is further evidence of how broken the system is. It's not the kids fault your workload is unmanageable. Any kid who came to school talking about similar punishments meted out at home would be sent to safeguarding.

I'm a teacher btw

WorraLiberty · 07/12/2018 22:44

DS was not allowed to speak, not allowed to out his hand up, not allowed to say he had no course work, at one point when DS was taking unwell, he lay his head on his table and was told to sit up and look forward!

See I'm sorry but that's bollocks.

Every child is allowed to raise their hand to get the attention of the teacher/supervisor.

FGS he could be in the middle of an asthma attack or something, if he was, what would he do? Just die politely and quietly? Confused

No-one would have punished him for raising his hand quietly and if they tried, then you'd have reason to be furious.

You really need to check this part again with the school.

Iamrightok · 07/12/2018 22:44

OP You saw the isolation rooms when you toured the school. Did you raise any concerns then about the small booths or white walls?

Rather than make a complaint, why don’t you become a school governor?

You can than raise those type of issues directly with the school in a forum that might just lead to real change- for all children.
Rather than just being a parent having a moan because this issue is now affecting your child.

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 22:47

WorraLiberty, but the child did need medical attention at the end of the punishment. He was told not to speak. He didn't. He tried to rest his head, he was told to sit up and look straight ahead. Guantanamo Bay use similar tactics.
And bollocks if you say otherwise.

BoneyBackJefferson · 07/12/2018 22:47

Mynydd

so many people have been quick to call the punishment wrong yet only one has offered a suggestion as to a replacement and that would be even more ineffective and wrong

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 22:49

I think if either of my sons was left staring at a white wall with nothing to do for a full day, which in turn lead to him requiring medical treatment, I'd want someone to hang.
Fuck being a governor. I would only care about the barbaric treatment of my own child.

BoooForYou · 07/12/2018 22:49

YABU
As the parent of a child who has been hit by a kid "messing about" who "is such a good kid usually", I fail to feel sorry for yours.
He could've caused the child he threw it at to lose their sight. Your child facing the consequences and getting a migraine did not require a waste of NHS time either.
Stop limiting his cock up and back the school up.

MyShinyWhiteTeeth · 07/12/2018 22:49

We used to have booths similar to this in the language rooms at school. Kids in detention would sit in them and write lines. We took exams in them sometimes.

Some children have collapsible, portable, privacy, desk barriers which they use to block out distractions in the classroom.

NutCrackerSuite · 07/12/2018 22:50

I'm glad I home ed my asd dc. Oddly, if I subjected my dc to similar, punitive measures then it would likely become a 'safe guarding' 'child protection ' issue which would, ironically, force my dc into the same state imposed position but with no redress!

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 22:50

And if I wasn't informed of this punishment until after the fact, I would literally need to be held back.

Iamrightok · 07/12/2018 22:53

The dukes
And there in lies the problem!
If you became a governor you may be able to stop the barbaric treatment of all children!
So many parents are so quick to complain but very few of them actually get off their arses and give up their time to become governors where they can affect real change in a school.

SmileEachDay · 07/12/2018 22:53

I would literally need to be held back
How would that help anyone?

Squidgee · 07/12/2018 22:55

Oh good grief.. i'm sorry you've had some totally over the top and ridiculous answers OP.

At this point I think i'd contact the Head Teacher/Principle and take the matter to them. The Isolation Heads refusal to engage with you really isn't acceptable and its time to go over their head.

While I agree you have to be seen to support the schools disciplinary procedure, I do think that a days isolation was disproportionate to the misbehaviour and think that needs addressing. I'd be asking to see a copy of their behaviour policy which should outline their levels of consequences.

Good luck and do let us know how you get on.

To everyone else.. a few points

  1. they didn't know it was a migraine when they took him to A&E, they had a child presenting with headache, vomiting and sensitivity to light, taking him to A&E was sensible to rule out anything like meningitis.

  2. A Migraine is not 'just a headache' and if two drs believe that staring at a white wall is the cause, then its quite likely a repeat would also cause another migraine and its not ridiculous to raise this in regards to any further incidents of isolation during his time at the school. There are reasonable adjustments that can and should be considered.

BoneyBackJefferson · 07/12/2018 22:56

I would literally need to be held back.

And I am sure that the police would do just that as they were escorting you from the school grounds.

Iamrightok · 07/12/2018 22:56

Agreed! Smileachday
Violence against teachers sets such a good example for children.
Pathetic

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 07/12/2018 22:56

I admit, it is many years since my mum taught. But it was at the time when they still had the belt. Which she never used. She was crippled with arthritis and still a force to be reckoned with! She loved kids and got the best out of them. She taught at the school my dc now attend.
I reckon she would be horrified at this isolation punishment

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 22:59

One of my ds has had a punishment in primary school (aged about 7 maybe). He was put to stand against the wall for 5 minutes during playtime. For what misdemeanour I can't quite recall, but whoever was supervising obviously saw something.

He comes home with a tale of woe that he hated Miss SoandSo because she put me on the wall for no reason.
Me being Papa Bear, rang a friend who worked at the school to find out the skinny of Miss SoandSo. She said that she was full sure that whatever ds had done, he would have deserved it as Miss SoandSo normally thinks the sun shines out of his not-sorry ass.
So I then gave ds a telling off for lying lol.

That is the one and only time either of mine have been punished at school (that I've heard about anyway). But that was FIVE minutes. Not a full day?

A full day is how you break prisoners ffs! The child had already admitted to his wrongdoing and complied with his punishment by not opening his mouth or speaking (my heart breaks thinking of the poor chap).

I'm just baffled tbh.

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 23:00

Does anyone dispute that Guantanamo Bay use similar tactics to torture PRISONERS?

Iamrightok · 07/12/2018 23:02

The dukes
Should we bring back corporal punishment then?
That means the poor chap could talk as much as he likes after getting hit with a belt!
What punishment do you suggest?

BoneyBackJefferson · 07/12/2018 23:02

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs

The problem is that you are talking about a completely different time in education.

Any child that wasn't NT was taken out to a "special school"
Any child that had behavioural issues was shipped out to "special schools" or borstals
SEND didn't exist
and parents backed the school up 100% to the extent that children would be beaten by their parents on the say so of teachers, even after the teachers had beaten the children.

Do you really want to hold that time up as an example of better?

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 23:03

5 minutes in isolation at recess would have done it I'm sure.

SmileEachDay · 07/12/2018 23:04

dukes

I’m no expert but I’m pretty Guantanamo is rather less comfortable than a classroom with some dividers.
With toilet breaks.
And food.
And the option to put your hand up and ask for work.

Although apparently they waterboard for second offences...

Iamrightok · 07/12/2018 23:04

The dukes
You need to spend some time in a secondary school if you think 5 minutes is an effective punishment!

Thedukes · 07/12/2018 23:06

This child is a young child if I recall correctly.

Buggeroffbingbunny · 07/12/2018 23:06

Class teachers do not need to confirm a student is in isolation!

In my school I am emailed a list in the morning of who is in. When I take my class register it is also flagged so I know why they are not in my classroom. I therefore wouldn’t need to call down to check they were in isolation as I would know from the register that’s where they were!

I would however send some work down via email to the isolation supervisor to ensure some learning can take place.