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AIBU?

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Original poster

Shoes off house

111 replies

acornfed · 05/12/2018 20:59

We are a shoes off house. I've grown up that way, I've lived in countries where that is the norm and with small children
And crawling babies I hate the thought of dog mess being trapsed into my house of which there is plenty around.
I am not a clean freak, my house is not full of precious rugs or floors. We just don't like shoes in our house.
Recently a couple of friends have been noticeably offended that we've asked them to take their shoes off (so politely) before they come in.

Why are people like this?

OP posts:
redandwhite1 · 05/12/2018 23:12

100% shoes off, annoys me when people wear them but I don't tell them to take them off

My b&sil had a brand new build and wore their shoes, carpets looked awful just a year old - unbelievable

BackforGood · 05/12/2018 23:14

What MereDent said in the 4th reply.

Oh, and if you want thousands of answers to this question, just do a search on MN - this question gets asked about once a fortnight. It seems there are swathes of MNers who can't understand that other people are different from themselves.

badlydrawnperson · 05/12/2018 23:21

this question gets asked about once a fortnight.

Once a fucking nanosecond more like :)

Chickpea99 · 05/12/2018 23:23

Interesting, as most people mention culture differences as a reasons to take iff ir keep shoes.
My reason to take them iff and request my quests to do so is basically a hygiene.
I have clean house, not spotless, but clean. I can not imagine that someone would step on my cream carpet with outdoor shoes. Its not rude to ask guests to take off shoes. It is rude to think you are so special with your holes in socks ets that host should clean after you.

Klobuchar · 05/12/2018 23:24

I’ve lived in lots of countries and the only shoes-on households I’ve ever known are in the UK.

Chickpea99 · 05/12/2018 23:24

Sorry for speling mistakes. Have new phone with microscopic keys :(

daphine2004 · 05/12/2018 23:36

Shoes off since I moved into a really nice place and wanted to keep it clean about 8 years ago. When I had kids this was even more important to ensure they didn’t eat anything which had been stuck in a tread!

I also think it’s disgusting when people put their feet up on chairs or sofas wearing shoes 🤮

Deadringer · 05/12/2018 23:37

Irish and in my 50s and was only ever in a shoes off house once in my life, I was in my teens and thought they were weird. Seven people live in my house and we have lots of visitors but only once did dog shit get walked into the house and that was by one of my dc, it was a pain but not a big deal. Maybe shoes in the house is unhygienic but it doesn't seem to have done us any harm and we are all very healthy. I don't have carpets but if I did I wouldn't have a cream one, seems very impractical to me. Floors are for walking on, they don't have to be germ free.

HildaZelda · 06/12/2018 00:01

What are you all doing that you're trekking through vast mounds of dog shit all the time? Confused
I never take my shoes off in the house. Neither does anyone else who ever comes in and I have NEVER, not even once, had anyone bring dog shit in on their shoes.

Rumboogie · 06/12/2018 00:05

I hate people taking their shoes off in my house. I do NOT want their smelly feet/skin cells/athlete's foot etc all over my carpets. We take our own outdoor shoes off but exchange them immediately for slippers just inside the door - this is for comfort.
I do not take my shoes off in others' houses as I have painful feet due to arthritis, and this makes it difficult to walk unshod. I think it is rude to ask others to remove their shoes unless they are visibly filthy. (especially at parties when guests turn up in their finery complemented by lovely shoes, and then are left looking silly in bare feet.

SpoonBlender · 06/12/2018 00:54

We're a shoes off house. Never had anyone even raise an eyebrow when we've said.

Flambola · 06/12/2018 02:34

My mum is Thai and it's thought of as being incredibly rude to keep your shoes on in someone's house. However, I don't force people to take their shoes off in my home. It just makes me cringe a little inside when they don't.

LaurieMarlow · 06/12/2018 02:50

I hate people taking their shoes off in my house. I do NOT want their smelly feet/skin cells/athlete's foot etc all over my carpets

Totally agree with this. I hate feet, keep them covered thank you.

In Ireland, shoes off isn't common at all. I only remember one house growing up that was shoes off. In the north of England shoes off seems more of a 'thing'.

TheSerenDipitY · 06/12/2018 02:51

we have always had fully carpeted homes ( we are in NZ) and often they are light coloured, so shoes off is a must if we want the carpets to stay clean, (yes we can regularly give them a wash but washing a pure wool carpet is costly and takes ages to fully dry and you get that wet wool smell for ages too) so shoes off and if you have issues with that.... dont visit
We have some Japanese friends and they are also shoes off but have baskets of little ballet type slippers at the door ( washable cloth slippers) and you put those on while in the house... i do like that idea!

LaurieMarlow · 06/12/2018 02:56

In some countries the host will have an array of washable slippers in various sizes for guests to use

Ah, but are they artisanal?Wink

awesmum · 06/12/2018 03:32

This is so odd to me, we're a shoes off house, I never ask people to, they automatically do it and all workmen etc come in with foot covers. It never occurs to me to ask as it's a given. The same at friends houses.

Bringbackbertha · 06/12/2018 05:03

@lauriemarlow

Unfortunately not.... think they are man-made bit like these...

Shoes off house
MrsSchadenfreude · 06/12/2018 05:08

But what do you do if someone has really smelly feet?Confused

ADastardlyThing · 06/12/2018 05:48

I think its a bit rude. There was one time I went to a friend of a friends who was a shoes off person, I had no socks on. And raging athletes foot...... That awkward moment where she was very visibly weighing up what was worse to have on her carpet.....shoes or crispy foot....I'd pay money to see that again Grin (shoes won btw, thankfully!)

Racheallouise · 06/12/2018 05:52

Shoes off in house who knows what your dragging inside with you. Although wouldn't force the issue with strangers , but would never let anyone go upstairs in shoes my lovely carpet.

Bringbackbertha · 06/12/2018 06:05

Ohhhh those that want shoes off.... for those thst visit that want shoes on buy some of those blue shower caps for feet!!

Everyone is now happy

ForalltheSaints · 06/12/2018 07:07

I would not want this in my house, but each to their own.

Surfskatefamily · 06/12/2018 07:47

My cousins partner refuses..so hes not invited. I think guests should always respect the home.

Hisaishi · 06/12/2018 07:55

I have always been shoes off but more so since I moved to Asia. I've had estate agents remind me to take my shoes off to go inside empty houses before, that's how ingrained it is here.

Everyone always wears nice socks, no holes, and you can buy them everywhere (eg corner shop etc) if you do happen to get a hole in one.

Many people provide slippers but it's not a necessity.

It just makes sense. People eat/sleep/sit on the floor a lot more than they do in the west. The floor is not just a walking place, but a sitting/resting place. You don't sit with your shoes on the bedsheets/sofa, so why would you do it on the floor, since you're going to eat/sleep there.

If someone refused to take their shoes off in our house, they just wouldn't be allowed in. My husband (Asian) is always perplexed by my parents saying he can leave his shoes on. It's like saying 'oh you can just leave your scarf/hat/gloves on' to him.

He can also take his shoes off and put them on so much faster than me. Must be all the practice...

HidingFromMyKids · 06/12/2018 07:55

I know people who are shoes off, for hygiene reason, but see nothing wrong in having a loo in their bathroom.

I'd like to apologise for being such a disgusting creature that can't afford a mansion and must live in such vile conditions where a toilet is within a bathroom. Hmm

I think the shoes on/shoes off needs context. If you are coming to mine, where I mostly have carpets, you are likely to be comfy with your feet up on my sofa with a brew while we chat.
If you say do I have to take my shoes off I will say of course not. I would hope that you would check they are mostly clean and wipe them on the mat first.

If you are visiting a large home with hard floors for a cocktail party it would be odd for people to shuffle round in socks and bare feet.

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