To ask for your beauty tips to look less old and haggard..,

[worthygirl]

I’m 45 and suddenly ageing really really badly- I look like my face is falling off and have black rings under my eyes.
I try to get decent sleep, eat well, don’t really drink and don’t smoke - I think I am just worn out & a bit perimenopausal. I have good makeup too.

I know I can’t stop the passage of time but also I know there must be ways to look a bit less haggard and old.

Aibu to ask for your beauty tips- what can I do? Any specific treatments that help?

Botox. Try it - if you don't like it you don't need to have it again. Ask them to start subtle though - if your skin is as bad as you describe (I'm sure its not) you risk looking silly if you go from 'haggard' (your words not mine!) to line free forehead overnight it will be a bit obvious.

I found I look LOADS better in the mirror now my eyesight's going.

Botox and fillers. Semi permenant makeup - specifically eyebrows! They really widen your eyes.

Sleep, plenty of water and I find moisturiser to keep me looking less haggard

I feel your pain, aged 46, it is all going the same way for me too

Agree with Botox and subtle fillers but also Laura Mercier radiance primer makes me look wide awake. Curled eyelashes help too.

Once you need reading glasses, you'll find that they do a reasonable job of hiding bags.

Retinol - I'm your age and have noticed a huge difference using 2.5% (viola skin on amazon)

Me too OP and I'm beginning to see the positive side of the burka!

Really great hair and teeth. Have a look at Helen Mirren. You may need to spend more on your hair now than you have been.
Being at the exact right weight for your height (not easy I know).

Get your eyebrows threaded professionally somewhere amazing a couple of times a year, you can then maintain yourself.

Use black mascara and eyeliner (not harshly) as it's more modern than brown. I use a flick of brightly coloured eyeliner too (turquoise, bright pink etc), and I get complements on it from 20somethings (I am 48).

Don't wear lipstick with a defined edge or matte lipstick - use a pinkish shade (red makes teeth look yellow) in the middle of your lips, smudge out towards the edges and put gloss over the top.
Buy a magnifying illuminated mirror.
Advanced electrolysis for any little lumps and bumps, milia or broken veins. electrolysis.co.uk/advanced-treatments/

Water. Drink endless water. It's silly but the more I drink the better my skin looks, the whiter my eyes look, the more alert and awake I look. Drink all day every day and you'll see a difference.

Also, my friend is late 30's and recently had Botox done. Only very sparingly rather than the full Wildenstein version, but she just looks like a better version of herself - not obviously 'done', just better.

If you have long hair all one length you may need to go for a shorter layered cut. It's hard to give up long hair I know, and various websites will tell you that older women can rock long hair. But the truth is it drags your face down and is ageing.

I made a little beauty discovery.. The body shop's hemp hand cream applied to my face made me look amazing!! I don't know why I never tried it before but now is a firm part of my routine

Watch makeup videos on youtube. You don't want to go for the Instaface look, but I have learned a lot from them, eg I now do a little bit of contouring, use highlighter, which I never did before. I have a wonky nose tip and I can totally disguise it now. It's easy to get into a makeup rut. I have a Pinterest board with makeup looks I like too.

Low carb high fat diet.

I have made an effort to get some positive vision and role models for what I want to look like as I age, both in terms of fashion and beauty. They are pretty bold and ballsy ones too. I think the mid 40s are a time you have to make an effort to really re-envisage yourself, and not be looking backward and trying to look like you did when you were 30.

Water does not have any anti-ageing effects, so save yourself all those trips to the lavatory.

Never look down into an iPad when the screen is black/on camera, it's terrfiying.

Hydration absolutely does make a difference - most people are slightly dehydrated, and that has an effect on the skin.

I wouldn't touch filler and botox - you probably look better and younger than Katie Price and the TOWIE bunch anyway. Botox doesn't just paralyse the muscles of the face, it paralyses the muscles of the blood vessels supplying the skin - hence that waxy look people get. Skin needs blood to stay young.

Look for Matrixyl in products - No 7 moisturisers/serums have it, and you can get other products online if you search.

And if the worst comes to the worst, I'd go for an old-fashioned facelift over botox/fillers.

I would really recommend using an LED mask on the red light. You can tell the difference after only one use. You can get them on amazon for about £50.

ShinyMe I find that removing my glasses is the best way to deal with my dusty house.

Your clothes, hair and colours need to suit you and not be dated. I keep seeing women older than me (and I'm 49) who are stylish, contemporary looking and rock their age frankly. I wonder if theres an awkward stage between that and when you can still pass for in your 30s.

I looked terrible going through the Peri but once fully through the Menopause, my skin started to recover.

I agree that it's all about your lifestyle.

I had my eyebrows Tattoo'd. Started using retinol and hyaluronic acid products.

Bought a home microneedling kit and radio therapy and next year I'm getting under eye fillers and half ml of lip filler.

I look great when I take off my glasses :D

I wonder if theres an awkward stage between that and when you can still pass for in your 30s.

I totally agree with this. It's like a second version of that awkward gawky year or two when you are not a child but not a teenager. That's why I said that doing a bit of creative 'visioning' is really helpful. There is a blog called Advanced Style which is interesting, I also collect images on pinterest of amazing, very directional looking clothes and makeup on older women (by older I mean over 60). I mean clothes that younger women couldn't even pull off.

Everything needs to be better quality- make-up, hair cut and colour, clothes. Don’t be afraid of of a bit of Botox and fillers from a properly qualified practitioner; done properly it can look really natural, not fake. Retinol and hyaluronic acid in skincare, good nutrition with lots of fresh vegetables and fruit, and enough good quality sleep. Enjoyable exercise such as dance classes and walking. Spend time on yourself without guilt.

Retinol. I’ve been using The Ordinary in the weakest formulation they do in squaline.
Been doing it about 2 weeks and have had a couple of complements already. I’m 52.