To ask someone to wear headphones on a train?

[BryarTuck]

I'm on a busy train and not in a quiet coach but it is quiet generally, apart from a man in the seat in front of me watching YouTube videos without using headphones. It's so irritating and I can't move to other seats.

As I'm not in the quiet coach is this OK? I still think it's rude- should I ask him to put some headphones in? The person next to me is wearing headphones and listening to music which made me think of everyone behaved liked the man in front it would be awful.

WIBU to say something?

Nope not rude at all, in fact I admire your courage, I always think very bad things in those sorts of situation but could never bring myself to say anything.

I always say something. Normally I just ask the person to please turn it down and they get the message.

Definitely ask, it would annoy me too. Hopefully he's not an arse and will put his headphones on!

I'd ask a member of staff to ask him.

I wouldn't blame you for asking him but I don't know if I would confront myself.

Urrrrrrgggghhh i ask about 10 people a week to please put their phones on silent on the train / tube. It's absolute gorilla behaviour, so rude.

I am very smiley and polite 'so sorry to bother you but would you mind putting that on silent please?' 50% of the time they comply willingly (often apologising) 25 % of the time they comply begrudgingly and 25% of the time they kick off 'why should i? What's it to you?' to which i reply 'oh rude and an idiot, aren't you a charmer'.

It's worth piping up OP. even if get an ape-like response i am hopeful that the people around us take note and, if they are tempted to share their tinny music in future, think better of it

I can completely sympathise but you are risking him kicking off at you.

Maybe he doesn't have headphones - otherwise he would be wearing them?

I would say something, and I’ve done it before. No one wants to listen to someone else’s phone on the train.

@RestingBitchFaced then he can do something that doesn’t involve noise.

You need to gauge the 'kick-off' risk. A normal person might get mouthy (in which case you just ask the conductor to remove the abusive passenger) but you're not going to get battered.

Agree! After I posted I thought I should have added he could still turn them down 😬

@restingbitchfaced are you for real? Maybe he can sit and browse the Internet or organise his photos or send what's app messages or something that doesn't impact his fellow passengers?

I said something a couple of weeks ago, the guy was a complete arse and did a ‘er, why should I?’ response. Winds me up completely although DH said I shouldn’t have said anything I think there’s a general move towards a lack of politeness and courtesy in society at the moment and the erosion of manners makes me sad.

Ok sorry i retract my comment above apart from to add that 'quietly' sitting watching videos is fucking annoying too!

Go and sit near him and play Christmas songs at top volume?
Neb over his shoulder and start laughing and commenting on his videos.
Or tell him about an amazing new invention called headphones, which prevent others from Having to listen to shite YouTube videos.
Or sit quietly and seethe....... you know you're going to

I'm assuming he doesn't have headphones otherwise he'd be wearing them.

A considerate person would do something else rather than noise on other people in that situation. Which is probably a good indication of the response you'll get if you ask him to can it.

I just say something like, "Can you use headphones?", which usually works. Yes, it's rude, but then these shits have fuck all manners anyway.

I just can't imagine thinking, "I'll just watch TV on the train, fuck everyone else". It's that childish lack of self awareness that most of us have grown out of by age 10.

Yes and no... Honestly half the time the people i speak to seem embarassed and surprised. Sometimes they clearly just hadn't realised and needing it pointing out to them.

Sadly these types of people take advantage of the sad fact that the chances of someone saying something to him is very rare indeed these days

I would have tutted or perhaps sighed loudly. Depending on my mood I might have also rustled my newspaper aggressively.

Some people do this, from time to time, on my commute. I don't know is it that they genuinely see nothing wrong with it, or are just being rude.

I haven't said anything yet, though have been tempted.

Sometimes I tell myself it's not as bad as the sniffing cacophony that takes off, mostly in the morning.

Yes I have done it. He waffled on about it being for the kids. But he turned it off. Then spent the rest of the journey entertaining everyone when he realised he forgot all the passports. We were on our way to the airport.

His brother had to chase us in car that never caught up.

It got so irritating and I could see the women across the aisle from him were annoyed too so I went to the loo and as I walked back asked: "excuse me would you mind wearing headphones?"

His response- "I don't have any" and is continuing as he was.

I've had some sympathetic glances from other passengers, but now he's just enjoying being belligerent.

Sometimes I tell myself it's not as bad as the sniffing cacophony that takes off, mostly in the morning.

Ah, the sniff symphony. It's a known fact that 95% of commuters at any given time have no access to hankies.