Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask someone to wear headphones on a train?

58 replies

BryarTuck · 02/12/2018 09:18

I'm on a busy train and not in a quiet coach but it is quiet generally, apart from a man in the seat in front of me watching YouTube videos without using headphones. It's so irritating and I can't move to other seats.

As I'm not in the quiet coach is this OK? I still think it's rude- should I ask him to put some headphones in? The person next to me is wearing headphones and listening to music which made me think of everyone behaved liked the man in front it would be awful.

WIBU to say something?

OP posts:
ButchyRestingFace · 02/12/2018 10:11

His response- "I don't have any" and is continuing as he was.

Knew it. Just your garden variety dick, and there are plenty of them around.

HamiltonCork · 02/12/2018 10:11

Well done for trying. I’m too much of a coward.

DexyMidnight · 02/12/2018 10:12

Well done OP. If it's a long journey I'd ask the conductor to intervene.

In future ask the twats to put it on silent please. You kind of gave him a twatty escape the way you phrased the question

BuffaloCauliflower · 02/12/2018 10:16

See I would have said ‘that noise is bothering everyone, we don’t want to hear what you’re watching, can you use headphones or turn it off’

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 02/12/2018 10:16

I hate it. It's the same at various activities I take DD to and wait for her - fucking Peppa Pig blaring out of a phone to entertain the younger sibling.

ChodeofChodeHall · 02/12/2018 10:20

His response- "I don't have any" and is continuing as he was.

I would reply with, "Other people on the train don't want to listen to that", and then usually people will pipe up in agreement.

ButchyRestingFace · 02/12/2018 10:25

I would reply with, "Other people on the train don't want to listen to that", and then usually people will pipe up in agreement.

My experience in these situations is that the offending party then asks “other people” directly who chime in with “Oh, I don’t mind.”

Lord preserve me from people pleasers.

Breakfastofmilk · 02/12/2018 10:28

Yeah, totally not unreasonable to say something but if someone is enough of an inconsiderate twat that they're doing this in the first place it seems unlikely that they'll stop just because you ask. This is why I never go on public transport without headphones of my own to block out this sort of thing and the sniffers.

Sometimes I fantasise about playing classical music at high volume then doing a fake surprised response if they complain to me but I haven't been brave enough yet....

masterandmargarita · 02/12/2018 10:32

I would have then asked him to turn it down. Any body who uses noisy electronic gadgets in public spaces without head phones is a selfish fecker

chachaboom · 02/12/2018 10:33

Ooh, I've just thought of a good response for the people who don't comply! Depending how confident you are, you could start singing, not necessarily loudly, just showing them how annoying it is to endure sounds you don't want to hear.

ShotsFired · 02/12/2018 10:40

I once told a grown man on a train to take his litter with him when he'd been studiously stuffing his wrappers in between the upright arm rest and seat.

He was very stroppy about it and called me stupid names ("litter police"!) but did actually fish it out and take it.

We (as society) need to be better at polite confrontation and make antisocial behaviour (and bad reactions to being called out) unacceptable.

HopefullyAnonymous · 02/12/2018 10:44

If you’re on a train it’s a byelaw offence to play sound if it’s to the annoyance of others. There are some wonderful quirky railway laws 😂 YWNBU to ask him to stop doing it, you could always ask the conductor to intervene. It’s a pet hate of mine.

Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 02/12/2018 11:05

DexyMidnight, do you not worry that the people you say that to might want to knock you out?

DexyMidnight · 02/12/2018 11:08

Mmm not really. There's people I've decided not to approach (drunks, large groups of loutish men or women) but I'm not scared of someone telling me to fuck off. I start off extremely polite but i can give as good as i get.

Aridane · 02/12/2018 11:26

I'd ask a member of staff to ask him.

Because there are so many staff on trains- a bit like flight attendants Grin

That said, I would do the same...

Rachel0Greep · 02/12/2018 11:38

Ah the sniff symphony. It's a known fact that 95% of commuters at any given time have no access to hankies.

For sure!
I have been tempted to start passing around packets of tissues. But mostly I put on earphones, or put in earplugs and try not to hear the sniffers.

RaspberryRipple1963 · 02/12/2018 11:52

Unfortunately,the world today is full of self-centred,entitled people who think that they can do exactly as they like,regardless of the impact on people around them. Their attitude is 'How dare you question my right to be a total arse?'. I absolutely hate it when people persist in watching stuff on their phone/tablet without using earphones,and unfortunately it's something that I encounter quite frequently. Only twice have I (very politely) asked someone if they could use headphones,as the noise was distracting me. The first time I was met with a grudging response of 'OK,if it's bothering you that much',followed up by frequent dirty looks afterwards. The second time (when I was in a coffee shop) I was literally told to fuck off and mind my own business! Thankfully,a passing member of staff overheard his response and told him that he was out of order speaking like that,and to either put headphones on or leave. Thankfully he chose the latter option.

Lottapianos · 02/12/2018 12:00

'This is why I never go on public transport without headphones of my own to block out this sort of thing and the sniffers.'

Same here.

OP, well done for having a word. What a shame he turned out to be such an utter plum. Why people think it's ok to blare their stupid noises out in public is beyond me

ilovesooty · 02/12/2018 12:02

I once sent a tweet to the rail company to complain and they sent a guard down to tell the offender to stop.

LittleScottieDog · 02/12/2018 12:02

Anyone else getting headphone ads now? Grin

I've only managed to do this once; I was on an overnight coach from Seattle to San Francisco and there was a guy across the aisle playing music at about 11pm. I was petrified as a young woman travelling in a big country, but managed to ask them to turn it down which they did. I was proud of myself but goodness me, the adrenalin was pumping through me. I don't life that feeling, so usually I just sit and suffer.

I need more balls!

ForalltheSaints · 02/12/2018 12:02

YANBU to be unhappy. You should ask- even if 'have you lost your headphones?'.

Thankfully not an issue when I travel on London Underground, possibly as some train noise is such you could not hear without headphones.

DorisDances · 02/12/2018 14:21

Tweeting is a good idea as alerts staff in real time often

NewPapaGuinea · 02/12/2018 14:29

I think unless you’re sitting in the quiet zone then you can’t expect others to be quiet.

Would you put up with people talking, having a phone conversation etc or would you expect them to be quiet too?

Chouetted · 02/12/2018 14:34

If I did this it would be an absent minded slip, so I would absolutely welcome having my idiocy pointed out to me.

I'd be absolutely mortified of course, but that's life.

Princessmushroom · 02/12/2018 14:36

NPG playing videos loudly is different to having a conversation isn’t it?

I bet you’re one of those parents who let their kids watch Peppa Pig on public transport without headphones

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread