When socialising with others does your DH talk to you

[Harrykanesrightsock]

I have been told that this is how it is for everyone.

Socialising with another couple, we sit down and DH immediately starts a conversation with the man who is his friend while me and friends wife start chatting. But that was how it was for the rest of the night, Two separate conversations. I tried on a good few occasions to draw a common topic and get all chatting but DH at the first opportunity turned back and starts the one on one with his friend.

He thinks IABU to expect us all to chat and this is how it is.

He has form for it but we we are usually with mutual friends who naturally bring the conversation back to include everyone despite DHs best efforts to segregate the group.

If he wanted a night with his friend then surely he should have done just that. It was actually a very awkward night for me.

I think it sounds weird and horrible yes but is also relevant as to how friendly you are with the other woman. If you aren't that close to her, then it is even ruder.

As you said in your OP, why doesn't your husband just go out with his friend separately? That would seem more sensible in this situation.

That sounds incredibly sexist and immature.

men talk to the men and women to other women

Sounds like a recipe for disaster if you were ever to have a male friend.

he doesn't really see women as real people worth conversing with

Agree with @BertieBotts on this one.

I had an ex like this, we would go out and the men would go on talking about golf while me and my friend just chatted like we were on our own. It’s just an old fashioned way of socialising and some men think this is the standard. You often get couples who go out together because the men get on together and the women do too.

But with my DH it’s not like that, we all just chat together.

So YANBU. I don’t know how you’ll change his mind though.

It’s similar to the old idea of the women chatting in the kitchen while the men drink beer and sit around at a party. Or “I’ve got a friend I’d like to go down the pub with, his wife is nice, you'll like her” and then you get stuck sat next to a woman you barely know all night. It’s old fashioned.

He sounds a sexist pig that thinks women should talk about fluffy stuff whilst the important men have the real conversations. Either that or he thinks his wife shouldnt converse with other men. How would he be if you decided to go out alone with a male friend? Surely he has always been like this though. How did you not notice before you got married?

Holy shit, I could not be with someone like that. He sounds like he doesn't find you very interesting or has much respect for you. Why invite you along at all if he's going to ignore you all night?