to wish my baby had an off button?

[Terrense]

He's 5 weeks old. He's beautiful. I'm completely smitten. I would do anything for him. But...

... he has been attached to my boob for 3 hours. Solid. My nipples are bruised. Sore. I'm tired. DH is at work. I need to eat. He's still going...

Growth spurt?

AIBU to want to switch him off?

On a serious note. Anyone else find their baby would very, very occasionally feed for hours at a time? He's never done this before...

He hasn't been solidly feeding for 3hrs, he'll be comfort sucking in betweenfeeding.i used to take my baby off when she was just comfort sucking, and then put her back on when she wanted to feed.

I wouldn't sit there for 3hours. You can put the baby down and make some food

@Lazypuppy I've tried. He just screams until I put him back. Literally, screams the house down. I'm considering a dummy as this is so draining...

I found my dd was a suckly baby... after 6 weeks I introduced a dummy. Helped no end.

If you need a rest and food put baby down. If he or she cries it's ok they won't come to any harm for a few minutes

In a few weeks or so you may master the art of moving around with baby attached to you or eating one handed!

Yanbu but you are doing a great job I can't offer any BF advice as I never managed to crack it with my DS but if you want to try a dummy then go for it. Your baby, your rules

We introduced a dummy at 2 weeks for this reason! My baby used to feed very efficiently for 10mins max every 3 or 4 hours at that age. I never used to let her comfort suck, i'd cuddle her but she'd have her dummy.

And i would put her down if i needed to do something. A minute or so of crying is necessary sometimes, you can't hold them all the time

Also download the wonder weeks app if helps you to know when anticipated growth spurts are and why they may be crying this week. (Changes more often than I change my knickers)

Also there is an app.called colic baby which has loads of sounds. I used to play white noise or plinky plonk music to soothe mine.

How people just shove their babies up their tops and carry on is beyond me! I can't ever imagine being that confident.

Ds1 was a sucky baby, I introduced a dummy when he was 6 weeks after he spent 7 hours attached to me and cried if I dared take him off me.
I also learned to feed him in a sling, which helped as I could at least get off the sofa.

Just cluster feeding. Part of normal breastfeeding behaviour - he's increasing your milk supply.

Sucks (litterally I guess) but 🤷🏼‍♀️

He should have a dummy anyway fyi. They're now encouraged as they've been shown that they reduce sids.

Get a dummy. I didn't use one with dc1. Didn't like the idea. Coped with a constantly feeding Velcro baby for 12 months. Cooked, washed up etc with him.in a sling. Ate over his head as he fed.

Dc2, also bf, dummy from a couple of weeks old. Game changer! Also one bottle of ebm a day.

Why don't you want to introduce a dummy?

It was a godsend in the early months and is still a comfort at night to my 12 month old.

Nothing at all wrong with them :)

Sorry can't advise on the breastfeeding though.

I learned how to BF in a sling, was very useful! Baby Bjorn was really good for this.

I wish I could get mine to take a dummy! He just chews on it and spits it out tried all the brands I could find! He definitely comfort suckles if I let him (which is not always possible with a 2 year old dd!)

Yes, I could have written your post. My little one went through a phase where he just wanted my boob all evening. And would cry at it and seem unhappy sometimes too.
I worried I would never be free again.
I worried I didn’t have enough milk.
My boobs ached and i started to dread the evenings.
And then, just like that, it passed.
Some wise Mumsnetters urged me to stick with it and I did. And I am so grateful.
I love the life we have now where I can go out with just some nappies and wipes in a bag and I can feed him easily anywhere.

The wonderweeks did help me understand the process too.

It will pass

Poor you it's a tough time. Both my dd didn't have dummies but the choice is yours. My advice is to let him cry for a few minutes while you dash the the kitchen for some snacks and a large glass of water find a film or box set on TV and slob out on the sofa, I even take my bra and top of . Your in it for the long haul today love. X

I really feel like there should be something inbuilt with kids where, after you've interacted with them sufficiently in a set period of time a button pops of of their forehead giving you 10 minutes where they're on pause and you get to just have a quick break. It should only ever appear if you have deserve it but my DD doesn't seem to have this feature. Sigh

@mykingdomforfree just to check have you tried the nuk dummies..they are the orthodontic ones. It's the only dummy my dd would take and even knows the difference with the cheaper but same shaped ones. They aren't cheap but feel really nice and doesn't seem to pull the jaw in like a round teeted dummy (and yes I tried them...dd thinks it's funny)

The whole feeding while moving takes practice.. I didn't do it often but it helped if I needed to get something. I also had a basket with all my essentials which I carried around the house so like a bottle of water, biscuits, book, phone ect so if I got caught in a different room or seat I always had my things with me to hand. Also made it easier to carry baby and all.my bits and bobs up.and down stairs etc

DD was a cluster feeding champion (she didn't have a dummy, we did try it at one point but she wasn't keen and it wasn't something I really wanted so we didn't push it).

If DH was out for the evening I'd build myself a snacks and drinks fortress on the sofa (sometimes in bed if feeling really lazy) and just settle in with netflix and a good book.

My PFB DD did this. With my second I realised that a lot of the time that he wanted to feed, and I thought he was hungry, he was actually tired, even if he hadn't been up for what seemed like very long (an hour from wake up or two hours any other time of day). And because of the school run etc with DD he got taken in the buggy a lot anyway so couldn't feed for that long and slept in the buggy. So if you have a way to get him to sleep not on you then you could try that more often - even if it means pushing the buggy inside/ round the block/ pointless car trips. Good luck!

Why are you torturing yourself withholding a dummy. There’s no prizes for not using one. It may not work but it might.

3 weeks is classic growth spurt time, stick it out, with or without a dummy, your supply will increase very soon to accommodate

Sounds like you're doing an amazing job and well done for breastfeeding 👏🏻 I remember when my DS was around that age he'd feed from 4pm til 10pm if I let him 😂 lookup cluster feeding. Its totally normal. My baby was BF and we had a dummy, you just need to watch for signs of hunger as well as the sucking, otherwise you could miss them. But yes as someone else has said, you'll learn to feed and eat and clean and do everything one handed with baby attached to boob 😂

Side note. My little boy is 2 now and I still wish he had an off button. Probably more so now 😂

Xx

I'm not intentionally trying to withhold a dummy, he just hasn't done this before so we haven't needed one. I don't have one to hand...

No baby ever died from crying. I could have kissed the HV who said this to me.
Baby isn’t Feeding for 3 hrs solid you are being a human dummy. The crying when you take away the boob is because baby hasn’t learnt to self sooth yet.
You are doing fine.
It does get easier
You will get your body back and some semblance of a life I promise.
Sometimes it is better to feed baby until they are full, burb and feed a bit more then pass them to someone without boobs who doesn’t smell like milk to settle them.
You will learn to ‘feel’ the difference between baby actively feeding and using you as a dummy so you can stop at that point.
On the dummy no dummy front, do what gives you a break and helps your child, sod public opinion.
I was anti dummy until I realised I was a human dummy. dc1 swapped a dummy for thumb very early, Dc2 loved dummies. Both gave them up around 3 and their teeth and speech are more than fine. Tbh the dummies could have gone a lot sooner but we held out until after a long haul airplane trip we had planned.

Mine cluster fed like crazy around that time. It was so, so hard but it did pass. He genuinely was hungry and he put a ton of weight on, I found going to get him weighed and seeing the numbers rise helped as at least I knew all the feeding had a purpose. I also used to try to express in the mornings so my husband could give him a few oz by bottle in the evenings so I could have at least a short break.

I hope it passes soon for you!