To ask about safe bedsharing?

[Oaktreepark]

I am reluctantly bedsharing with my 2 week old little boy as sometimes he will just not settle in the Moses basket beside the bed. I have read up on safe cosleeping/bedsharing guidelines but I am a bit confused. I wrap the duvet around my knees so it is kept well away from him. Is that ok or should we not be using a duvet at all? He sleeps in a grosnug with his arms out, and a baby gro and sometimes a vest underneath depending on the temp. If I bring him into the bed during the night should I remove the grosnug? We are breastfeeding/not drinking etc

That's where DD is 95% of the time too - but the bigger bed does help!

I still because with my 18 month old.

When he was first born, he wouldn't sleep anywhere but on me. Which was blood dangerous! He could have rolled off me and onto the floor! We needed that sleep, we needed whatever we could get to survive without losing our sanity.

Throughout the first 12 months, I wouldn't say I slept per se. I lightly slept, so whenever he stirred, I was up instantly whilst attending to him.

My HV gave me some brilliant advice that made it much less worrisome. DP was behind me, I was in the middle, DS was on the other side of me. I used the C shape to sleep next to him. Duvet on my legs. At the edge of the bed, we wedged in his Moses basket. So if he did roll, he would roll straight into that. Took alot of the worry out.

DS also used a sleeping bag because he kicked off the blankets. I always checked his temperature and as he fed multiple times during the night this was not an issue.

You will be aware of your baby far more than people think.

Follow the rest of the SIDS advice and I'm sure you will be fine. It's finding what works for you and baby too. That's the key.

*bedshare

Possibly also consider watching out for dressing gown belts, tie cords, scarves and long hair as they are suffocation hazards ( i co-slept with DD1 for 3years and am now also doing so with DD2. Wouldnt do it any ither way and it helps toilet readiness too )
And as with a cot, ensure that no curtains or cords are near your baby.
Also, agree with PP that a DH, especially a tired one, is the biggest risk factor. Offer him the spare room because you are doing him a massive massive super favour by allowing him to sleep in peace
SIDS and suffocation are two different mortal dangers with different risk profiles, but several overlapping ones.
And after a while, eg when your baby is about 4 months, you learn to twist yourself to feed from both boobs (one at a time obvs) whilst staying on the same sides of the bed, meaning you dont have to put baby in the middle of the bed between you and DH