When do you stop buying Christmas presents for nieces/nephews

[GunpowderGelatine]

Is 17 too young to stop buying Christmas presents for nieces and nephews?

I ask because we're on a bit of a tighter budget this year. We're not hard up by any means, but we've got bills for our garden revamp, extension etc to pay and so we're cutting back on present budgets wherever we can, including for each other and our own kids (5 and 2).

DH's sister has 3 kids - 21, 17 and 4. We stopped buying for the 21yo last year, and we are thinking of saying to SIL that 17yo won't be getting a gift. It's very hard to buy for the older 2 - they only like designer make up like MAC and Bobby Brown, and designer clothing (even their underwear has to be Calvin Klein or they won't wear it). So the last few years we've gone down the £30 voucher route but really that doesn't buy then much for their tastes, they end up having to find at least another £30 to buy a single thing they like, which has been commented on before. So we can't even try and get away with a cheaper present!

We will still buy the 4yo a present. SIL always buys ours, but in fairness from birth we've bought all of hers too.

Is it the height of tightness to say no presents for the older 2? I've only ever dealt with young children and I am yet to enter the arena of Christmas present politics 🙈

I would still do the 17y/o as you were still buying the older sibling at the age. We have a blanket rule of no gifts after you have turned 21 in our family. It seems to work

It's maybe worth mentioning that they both have their birthdays at the beginning of December, and again we always got a £30 voucher - I know they struggle to buy things with that amount as SIL has mentioned they have to wait until Christmas, when we give them another £30 voucher, before they can actually spend it 😬

We stopped Xmas at 18 but carry on with birthdays

That comment is just bloody rude though. I buy a family member a £10 gift voucher for MAC. And she puts other money to it.
And most things in MAC are around the £20 to £30 range (thinking lipgloss/eyeshadow/primer etc).

I find it incredibly rude that you’ve effectively been told your gifts are not expensive enough! I’d have spotted buying after that was said....

stopped (not spotted)

Can you just give cash instead of a voucher?

Well yes I was a bit when we were told not much could be bought with the vouchers! I don't really wear make up so have no idea of the cost but £30 has been our niece/nephew budget since the dawn of time so that's why they get it!

As for Calvin Klein knicks, they could be £3 a pair of £300 a pair for all I know 😂

18 ive bought for younger cousins but stopped at 18 which means this xmas one get something, one doesnt. The 18 year old suggested it as he is 18.

We stop at 18

I think get them a present, but spend what you can afford. So if that’s £10 in a card then that’s what it is.

I would give cash but it would have to be less than £30 and I'd be a bit worried that it was so obviously less than they usually get!

I think I need to unclench

Yes I think it’s very generous of you to spend £30 on gifts for them! Cheeky of them to insinuate you aren’t giving enough.

I find that no matter how much I spend or what I buy it will never be right.SIL has even said she regifted some of our presents or threw them away.People can be rude over Xmas gifts but when you are trying your best it’s not very nice.

I say do what you feel you want to do,don’t be guilt tripped into spending more than your budget allows.

We stop in our family at 21. But they would never be rude or pass comments. They would just be delighted as mine were at that age. Money is money and not to be scoffed at. I would stop at 20 since you stopped the older dd at 20.
Maybe its best to just give cash so they can spend it as they go along.

I stopped buying at about age 18. They've had their own children now so I buy for them

21 here.

After hearing that smartass remark I would just call a halt to it completely. Cheeky fucker. And if they question it you can just reply "Oh I thought that wasn't enough so didn't see the point". Entitled gits.

With my own nieces and nephews it was 21.

I stopped when they were 18. The last few years were "gritted teeth stuff" because of no "thank you", or a "thanks" tagged onto a Facebook message from their parents.

This year is the first time we aren't buying for older nieces (21 and 18) and vice versa for my two. Still do Birthday presents, usually gift voucher or cash
We still buy for my brother's 3 but they are tiddlies still
Don't buy for my other niece - my sister and I came to an agreement a couple of years ago, they live abroad

.... Doesn't buy to their taste so they have to top up??

I'd be thrilled to get any money towards anything... So what if they have to top up! At least they are a good way there.

There are some really ungrateful people out there.
I'd be grateful for a fiver in a card for my dds from their childless very wealthy aunts.

They don't get anything at all.

We stop at 18 & your SIL insinuating that your £30 voucher isn't enough is downright bloody rude - I'd be tempted to tell her to sod off altogether!!

I stopped at 18 for my nephew, due in part to him stopping thanking us/acknowledging gifts at 16.

My niece is 21 and we exchange gifts.

Why would it need to be less cash than £30 if the voucher is £30??

December birthdays are irrelevant.

I would keep going until 21 as you did for the older one to be honest and just give cash. It seems a bit tight to say "We're going to stop gifts a few years earlier for middle child so we can save for our garden revamp & extension"

Depends how close you are to them.

If very close you never do but then they are unlikely to be rude. If not close when they leave full-time education and if they are rude, when they become rude.

We stop at 18 for birthday and Xmas, but get a really nice present for 21st birthday. But, as you got a present for the older niece/nephew until 21, I would keep to that for the 17 year old as it doesn't seem fair.