"Probably a medical issue" AIBU to not agree

[Schlecky]

My 18 month old DD is not walking. She Is well ahead on all other measures and crawls and cruises around really well but will not walk without holding onto something and won't walk confidently. There doesn't appear to be a medical issue but her child minder insists it probably is and wants me to take her to the doctor. I went to the doctor with her recently about myself and mentioned the walking issue whilst I was there and he said no she's fine it's just she's not ready yet don't worry. However doctors have our old address (don't want to change it as will be forced to change surgery and they're brilliant) and he said I could go for support via the health visitor. But I don't know how to access a health visitor, she hasn't seen a health visitor since she was probably 3 months old? I just had no reason to take her for the weigh ins etc so I just didn't.

I'm now also worried she's not "in the system" or they've written to the old address because a friend mentioned a 1 year old questionnaire and check up via the health visitor. I think I might have to change our address now to get access to the health visitor etc but I have no idea how to go about it and I'm worried they'll all judge me for not seeing a HV enough and for not getting my daughter support if there is a physical reason why she doesn't want to walk yet. I'm a bit lost now and not sure what my AIBU is but any words of advice much appreciated.

Are her legs strong, can her legs hold her own weight while you hold her hands, at least for a minute?

Yes she cruised very well and walks around a lot but always holding onto furniture or something. She has sturdy legs.

My son didn't walk until he was 18 months old. I know for a fact because we videoed the first steps he took. He's 17 now and absolutely fine developmentally. He was considered dyspraxic when he was taking his GCSEs, and used a laptop to do them. But whilst he's been slow to get the hang of some physical things he always gets there in the end. I wouldn't assume your daughter definitely had a problem.

My older boy was 19 months and youngest 16 months, both chunky babies. I was not too worried as could see progress from pulling up, cruising around furniture etc. So I would say nothing to worry about if she is making progress

DH has a cousin whose kids all walked late. They were ace bum shufflers. By kid3 she didn't even worry about it. That last one walked at 22 months. They all grew up to be good footballers.

Honestly in OP's situation I'd probably lie to the CM about getting a reference to be assessed & in reality wait until at least 21 months before actually seeking a GP's advice. If the child is cruising loads, she'll probably walk independently very soon.

18 months is still within a normal range, especially if crawling and cruising. My DD was 18/19 months

Anecdotally, a young relative of mine was not walking at the same age, but she started to walk soon after and is now a healthy and intelligent 18 year old. I suspect it will turn out to be nothing to worry about!

My DS started walking at 19, nearly 20 months.

DD was late to walk and never crawled. She was a bum shuffler. Then at about 19 months she just stood up and walked across the lounge. No wobbles no falls. At 18 months I wouldn't worry if she cruises and can stand with support. I'd be seeking advice at closer to 2y if she still isn't off.

I work as a health visitor, just call the receptionist at the GP surgery they should be able to give you the contact number or often just googling health visit + your area will bring it up. Usually if not walking at 18mths we send them to GP to check there isn't anything underlying causing it. Usually it isn't but should be ruled out, we see this fairly often.

Don't worry about not attending since 3mths, lots of 2nd time parents don't bother, it's an optional service. As previous poster said clinics are often run in children centres and may be able to give you the number. Failing that most areas have a 'Family Information Service' within your local council website who should have the details.

It's good to hear I'm not alone. She is my PFB but I'm just very laid back and she's always been so bright and happy and I don't worry about her. Its only because my childminder has said about it that I've started worrying.

Not helpful really but I didn't walk at all until I was 19 months. No issues - just lazy I think! Fingers crossed your LO is the same. But definitely try the Sure Start Centres - ours was a God send xx

Google children's physiotherapy in your area as well and see if they have any drop in clinics. Or just phone them. Mine cruised for ages but turned out to have issues with her joints that I'd never have noticed myself. She got special supportive shoes and I was given exercises to do with her and told some things to do more of/avoid doing, etc.

@sueshoes thanks that is really helpful. I've googled and found a few in my area which I'm going to look into tomorrow.

@Schlecky oh definitely, if only to put your mind at ease that there isn't anything else going on!

Hope she takes off soon, then the fun really begins

My daughter wasn't walking at 18 months but she also wasn't crawling or even weight bearing so there were a number of red flags. She does have problems.

Sorry to hear that @OhWifey hope she is doing ok now

DD3 wasn't walking at 18 months and the doctor referred her to the hip clinic at the hospital to have her hips checked (not because I asked him to but because she was so undersized they were taking extra precautions). They were fine and about a month later she did start walking. And once she started she was a good walker from the off (not like DDs 1 and 2 who stumbled about and crashed a lot the first month or so they started walking). I would say no need for you to worry yet!

Like past posters, I would recommend updating your address details at the doctors though. Seeing a health visitor is not compulsory (and I never found them very helpful when mine were little as we never saw the same one twice and they always seemed to give contradictory advice) so they won't judge you for that. When mine were babies the health visitors used to go on rotation round the different doctor's surgeries (eg they were always at our surgery on a Tuesday) but later they centralised the system so you had to go to a particular health centre to see one. Maybe you have something like that in your area?

You'll have so many people telling you that their child didn't walk until almost 2 and they were absolutely perfect children, and they'll be completely right .

However, there are a few of us, a much smaller number, for whom that late walking was a sign of other issues. DD1 was a late walker, very much as you describe. She finally took her first steps at 23 months. Then, she walked 1.5 miles the very next day and boy you weren't going to stop her!!

Despite her love of walking, once she got going, she did eventually go on to develop epilepsy, get a diagnosis of global developmental delay, then moderate learning difficulties and goes to special school.

Obviously, she is at the other end of the spectrum to the late walking genius, but that's why Health Visitors always tend to refer late walking babies for assessment.

Interesting post thank you I'll bear that in mind

Do you know for definite that you'll have to move surgery because you've moved house?

I know all areas are different and my experience may well be different, but I moved 6 miles away and my surgery didn't even mention having to change doctors even though I pass another surgery now to get to the original one.

She'll probably walk just in time to take your decorations off the Christmas tree when you least expect it!

Are there any boisterous older children at the CM's, and has she been knocked over?

Schlecky, register and ask at your new GP surgery about a health visitor or go & see the doctor for reassurance - but I must say I've known a couple of babies who didn't walk at your daughter's age. Once they took off there was no stopping them! None of that has any bearing on how they are now, great young adults.

(I also know one person who didn't speak one word before the age of three and she is an intelligent person.)

I expect you'll come back in a few weeks and tell us how you are running around after her, trying to stop her getting into things, pulling out pots and pans and brushes from cupboards.

My dd didn't walk until 19 months. HV kept going on about it and the fact that she didn't turn over on her own (never mind that she just sat up instead) and insisted that the GP see her, but GP (and I) were not worried at all. She could clearly stand up holding on to things. And as my dd got older (she's now 16), it became clear that this is her personality. She doesn't do something in public until she's good at it. When dd did finally walk she walked, she didn't toddle and she never fell down. As opposed to Ds who is 18 (years) and still crashing into things.