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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What is the fuss about Christmas dinner?

111 replies

allupsidedown · 18/11/2018 13:02

AIBU in wondering why people get in a panic about cooking Christmas dinner. I make the starter (soup) days before and defrost and reheat on the day. The kids help prepare the veg on Christmas Eve as another incentive to show Santa they are good helpers!
Then it is just a glorified roast dinner with a fancier decorated table.
Again the kids help lay the table whilst I cook and other adults muck in where needed.
I just don't get why people get worked up about it. Surely they cook for their family on other days? It isn't that difficult if you prepare and sort out the timings beforehand.
After it is cooked and eaten I leave the clearing up to other adults and get tucked into the gin! Sorted!
I've had people announce on the morning they would like to come (their oven broke) no problem we always have way too much anyway. I've had people not come because of a sickness bug. Again, no problem, just leaves more leftovers for later.
I just don't get the angst. Am I missing something crucial?

OP posts:
babster · 18/11/2018 14:32

I have recently taken over hosting the family Christmas and find it stressful because 1) expectations 2) timing (maybe this will come with experience and confidence) and 3) the oven is just too small!

allupsidedown · 18/11/2018 14:32

My glorified roast Christmas dinner is:
Scotch broth for starter, made in advance
Main:
Turkey
Ham cooked in slow cooker overnight
Pigs in blankets - butcher prepared
Roast potatoes par boiled night before
Boiled potatoes
Mashed neeps prepared Christmas Eve
Carrots in sesame seed
Boiled carrots just for dd1
Honey parsnips (frozen and extra honey added at last minute)
Cauliflower cheese prepared Christmas Eve
Brussels sprouts with pancetta through it.
Red cabbage (though I might forget this as no one except me really eats it!
Skirlie bought
Turkey gravy bought
Bread sauce
Cranberry sauce made in advance

Dessert:
Trifle made by someone else and brought along
Christmas pudding made by my aunt and given as a gift
Gluten-free cheese cake from Markies
Pavlova (meringue made before but assembled by dds in morning)

Later mince pies,
Smoked salmon on bagels
Nachos

Lots to do but not too stressful. No one touches my oven though. I might murder them!

OP posts:
Aridane · 18/11/2018 14:33

I started this after speaking to some friends about ordering from the butcher. They were horrified by the prospect of me hosting 12 adults and 7 kids.

I would be borrowed too!

Aridane · 18/11/2018 14:33

Horrified, not borrowed !

Aridane · 18/11/2018 14:34

Fuck me - just wouldn’t have the space to cook all that!

Aridane · 18/11/2018 14:35

(let alone the space to fit 19 people)

bengalcat · 18/11/2018 14:38

Used to help parents do Christmas roast from my teens upward so not stressful for me just an extension ' of childhood '

chocolatebox1 · 18/11/2018 14:43

I'm only used to cooking for myself and sometimes for two, so I find it quite intimidating! That's because I'm not accomplished at making a normal roast though! I hope it's something I can become more confident with in time.

festivellama · 18/11/2018 14:47

The most faff I ever had was the year I did Christmas dinner for us, and also one for the NDN & her kids as she'd broken her arm two days before.

So 14 of us altogether, and with all manner of things cooking in ovens in two different houses it was a shambles like a military operation.

I'm sure I still have some dishes missing...

LoveAGlayva · 18/11/2018 14:48

I love cooking and have always hosted. We have 8 adults (maybe 10 as 2 are yet to confirm) and 6 children plus DH and I. I love the run up to it and never feel stressed or worried about it. I normally do 2 starters, turkey and ham with all the trimmings and a vegetarian meal. I also do a sherry trifle, Christmas pudding and profiteroles or ice cream for the children. I have a double oven and a 6 gas burner though - I don't think I'd manage if I didn't have those. I also use my mother's hostess trolley to keep everything warm before it's served.

WorraLiberty · 18/11/2018 14:49

It really is just a roast dinner

If people get all worked up about it they either need more practice or perhaps choose something else to eat.

I also think the sheer volume of food some people cook, is what causes the problems.

Keep it simple. No-one needs 57 different types of vegetables and 3 different kinds of meat.

It's just a dinner after all and as lovely as it is, it's still only a tiny part of Christmas day.

WorraLiberty · 18/11/2018 14:51

Mind you the OP has 9 different vegetables just for one dinner Confused

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 18/11/2018 14:55

Does anyone CHOOSE the boiled spuds over roasties, or are they just a backup for if you run out of roasties? Grin

MartyMcFly1984 · 18/11/2018 14:57

Oh my days do people really have starters? Is that the “glorified” part? I thought that was pigs in blankets 🐷😱

driggle · 18/11/2018 14:57

I think the stress can be down to wanting everything to be perfect. It is a glorified roast dinner really but there's an expectation of it being extra special. And the tricky bit for some can be fitting it in the oven and timing it to all be ready at the same time. I realised years ago to cook the pigs in blankets and stuffing for the last half an hour of the turkey cooking and then reheating them at the end just before the potatoes come out. When I wasn't a very experienced cook I'd end up in a flap trying to time things to be ready together. It can be a bit of a juggling act if you have more people to cook for than you do on your average Sunday.

I think as well with all the Christmas cooking programmes and magazines and cookbooks, there's the expectation for the food to be way more amazing than your standard roast dinner. I mean, how many ways can you really roast a potato? But there's a new Good Food mag out every Christmas telling us this is the way to roast them this year! I guess some people get sucked into it.

dontalltalkatonce · 18/11/2018 14:58

If you don't have space to do it all it can be a bit stressful, especially if you're hosting. If you've got a nice kitchen, big oven, nice cooker, plenty of storage in fridge and freezer then not so much.

Greensleeves · 18/11/2018 14:58

I love Christmas dinner cooking. Our MO is to do stockings first, then buck's fizz and croissants/brioches, then open pressies and drink the rest of the prosecco, then leave Grandad and the kids enjoying the pressies while dh and I go and cook Christmas dinner together, slightly tipsy, with Christmas music on. It's one of my favourite parts of the day!

Scatteredthoughtss · 18/11/2018 14:59

This post is hilarious! Some people want to feel superior and others want to be martyrs. I suspect most people just get on with it, but that doesn't make for a good story. OP telling everybody to calm down is ridiculous enough, but then posting a really long menu with several kind of meat and really quite gross sounding to me sides, who messes about with carrots like that? . Wouldn't fancy Christmas at yours, OP, sounds like it's far too rich.

stevie69 · 18/11/2018 15:01

We’ve got our Christmas dinner down to a fine art!

So have I. I eat out and let someone else worry about the cooking. I've never cooked a roast dinner: wouldn't know where to start Blush

Greensleeves · 18/11/2018 15:02

"Wouldn't fancy Christmas at yours, OP, sounds like it's far too rich."

And the award for the most hilariously bitchy Christmas-related post goes to...

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 18/11/2018 15:05

”I think for some it's an extension of the general Christmas related stress and anxiety. There is so much going on, pressure, living up to peoples expectations, family silent feuds. I wonder if the faff of dinner and the facc that's it's the highlight of the day itself means it's often just the straw that breaks the camels back, as it were.”

@tellmewhenthespaceshiplands - I agree with this. I know that I am prone to stressing over things, and the cumulative stress of organising the presents, the cards, the decoration, the food etc does get to me. It has got better over the years, as I have worked out the short cuts and tips that make it easier (shopping online, making things in advance and freezing them, and buying a Christmas pudding instead of spending 6 hours boiling Delia’s pudding, just for everyone to be too full), and so I am much less likely to make a big deal out of it than I used to be, bit I can still be pushed over the edge if something goes wrong.

The dses still tease me about the Great Goose Leftovers meltdown that happened a few years ago. I had a plan for the food over Christmas that had roast goose on Christmas Day, cold gammon (cooked and glazed on Christmas Eve) with baked potatoes and coleslaw on Boxing Day, and the leftover goose cooked in honey, five spice and soy sauce until sticky, and served with rice, on the 27th. But when I went to get the leftover goose on the 27th, half of it was missing! Ds2 had decided to treat himself to a delicious roast goose sandwich for his lunch.

It really wasn’t a disaster - we had salad, some leftover goose and cold gammon, and no one was going to starve, but it was the final straw for me, and I completely lost the plot - there were tears, there was shouting, there was snot and more tears - and dh had to take me away and give me a stiff gin to calm me down, then sort out supper. Blush

It Is a family legend now - I will never be allowed to forget it!

MyGardenNeedsHelp · 18/11/2018 15:06

The only time I got stressed cooking the Christmas dinner was the year I'd had too much pink champagne in the morning and managed to throw the roast spuds across the kitchen floor when getting them out of the oven Blush

greendale17 · 18/11/2018 15:07

I agree OP. It is normally the people who cook a roast dinner every week all year round then get in a massive flap cooking it on Christmas Day

AChefIsTrappedInMyCellar · 18/11/2018 15:08

I hope you scooped them up, dusted them down and told no one! Grin

morningconstitutional2017 · 18/11/2018 15:08

A lot of people feel that everything must be 'perfect' and drive themselves up the wall about it. It may well be a glorified roast but not everyone makes these on a regular basis.

I count myself as a reasonably competent and experienced cook but even I would get a little worried about cooking this for a large number of people for who I don't usually cook.

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