To think it is inappropriate for exOH to ask 10 year old to pour his wine

[NoMoreLimbo]

So, my ex OH, that I am still under the same roof as, is a big wine drinker. He sometimes asks the DC's (8 and 10) to go and get his 'juice' and asks them to pour it for him. I think this is really wrong and am wondering whether I am overreacting because it is him

What do you think dear mumsnetters? Would you be okay with your child of this age d,be asked to do this?

I'm not sure about the pouring, but he definitely should not be calling it juice incase they decide to help themselves.

Under the circumstances I wouldn’t be ok with it at all

With someone who didn’t drink too much who asked a 10 year old to pour and pass them down a glass of wine in a restaurant say, I’d have no problem.

I kind of know what you mean, but I think it’s mostly driven by the fact that he’s your ex, but he’s still there.

The pouring wouldn't bother me so much but my parents taught me to use the bottle opener when I was still in primary school so maybe not the best for advice...
Calling it juice is probably a bad idea though.

Oooh I don't like that, definitely wouldn't be comfortable with it. Plus they aren't his slaves he can get his own bloody drinks

Pouring you drinks?

That’s, like, reason number 2 why you have kids isn’t it?

I used to love pouring drinks for people as I felt grown up; but calling it "juice" doesn't sit well with me.

I would but be comfortable with that. We saw a relative ask 8yr old to pour her wine in the afternoon in front of us like it was normal. Nothing to stop the kid having a mouthful on the way in and it was just strange all round.

Tricky one! I was expected to make tea and coffee for my parents from the age of 8 despite not being allowed to drink coffee myself.

But at least they called it wine. Calling it juice makes the kids think they can drink it sometimes.

Pouring fine. Calling it "juice" - weird and wrong.

I definitely haven’t taught my toddlers to bring me Budweiser from the fridge

My dd has been pouring my wine for years.

Dad used to send us to the fridge to fetch him bottles of Becks at about age 9. It wouldn’t bother me.

And open them.

I wouldn’t have a problem with children pouring wine (my mum used to let me help her make cocktails from a young age and I haven’t turned into a raging alcoholic) but calling it juice? No.

My dad taught me how to make drinks for our family parties by the time I was 8. Neither one of my parents are drinkers and I only drink wine at night so I don't think I was irreparably harmed by it.

I always loved making the drinks but I was also taught that it was alcohol and for adults only. Calling his wine juice is just silly.

My 10 year old pours my wine sometimes!

I have my 11 year old pour me when when H isn’t around and I’m feeling particularly lazy! I call it “mums juice” but she knows what it is.

I think the fact he is your ex is clouding your viewpoint.

People saying they might drink some...there are a lot of wines that taste foul to an adult, let alone an 8yo.

My kids love to pour me a wine (and indeed any other drink like juice or water) but I wouldn’t call wine juice.

I used to mix my grandma's whiskey and lemonade from about that age. I've never drunk whiskey, can't stand the smell so I don't think it did my much harm! Agree calling it juice is a bit weird.

I’m sure the average 8 year old will know full well it isn’t actually juice. My kids know what wine is, regardless of what it gets called.

I used to take great pride st about age 9 in correctly mixing my grandfather’s nightly ‘medicine ‘ for his bronchitis ( very small toddy glass, two fingers of scotch, two of hot water, teaspoon of sugar ) - he barely touched alcohol otherwise.

My DDs referrred to my husband’s home from commuting G& T with extra ice as ‘Daddy Juice ‘.

None of us have any kind of problematic relationship with alcohol.

Generally speaking, no issue with it at all. I was a whizz at the perfect Brandy & Dry (my Nana’s drink) by 9 and happily made other drinks, poured wine, fetched a beer etc. I was allowed a sip if I wanted to try something...i really can’t see the issue.

However, I’d HATE it in your situation. You NEED to find a way to live separately. ASAP.