To wonder why anyone wants to be friends with a quiet person

[dustowl]

I have a few friends, and they seem to like me. But I often wonder why, I'm quiet and I wonder why they wouldn't want to spend time with louder funnier people . I imagine it's a confidence thing , but anyone else feel like this ?

Like JayoftheRed I'm naturally quite loud and really value my quieter friends, and take their lead.

When I'm around other noisy people we all seem to get louder and listen less, when you have a balance of people it can remind everyone to spend more time listening and not just waiting to speak.
You sound like a lovely friend, but also maybe too modest though - there's a difference between quiet and thoughtful and not able to contribute. What you have to say is just as valuable even if it's said more quietly.

Are you quiet as in you don’t really speak? Because I’d probably get a bit frustrated if you were not talking and it would probably be quite awkward as I’m a talker.

Loud on the other hand can sometimes be a bit much, but I’m crass and disgusting and I like my friends to be similar.

They like you! Don’t overthink it!

I have a quiet friends, and they are the most decent lovliest people ever. Not everyone wants loud and in your face. Or somebody who will just talk and talk and not let you get a word in.

Wow loud people are taking quite a bashing here

Loud people always get a bashing on MN.

It’s one of the most annoying things about MN.

I would never ever be rude about quiet people but on MN it is completely acceptable to roll out the usual stereotypes about loud people being rude, brash and obnoxious.

In real life all the loud people I know have a range of friends of all different temperaments.

It’s only on MN that quiet = good and chatty = very, very bad.

It’s quite disappointing really.

I find quiet people a balm to my soul. I enjoy the peaceful company.

It's a shame- it's perfectly possible to point out that there's nothing wrong with being a 'quiet person' without simultaneously tearing down louder people. I wonder if all the people who are doing so because they want to reassure the OP realise that by criticising loud people they are doing damage to others.

Sloeberri it is not you, it is them. I am a quiet person who would love a noisy loud person to liven things up. Those people behaved abominably towards you. I think I recognise the uptight middle class mini-Peyton Place PTA crowd and you are well shot of them than trying to break in. I hope you can find friendship in other areas of your life.

Once your children get to school age, it is sometimes easier to make casual friends with the mums of your dc's good friends as the children will want to have playdates together and you will have more in common. Chances are your dc will probably also gravitate towards children with similar background.

Anyway, I like loud. You are wonderfully transparent and brave to put yourself out there, even if it is to get a few laughs.

They listen
What they do say is more carefully chosen.

There is difference between noise and conversation.

Quiet people can be calming and let the louder people talk - as they are wont to do. There is a lot to be said for people who listen more than they talk. However...

Some quiet people however simply never speak - maybe a shy giggle or smile at everything anyone says; IMO they are actually just very dull. Not having any opinions on anything, any passion, any reason to make an effort is actually draining for others in any social situation where you are trying to include these people.

Being quiet isn'ta flaw I am quiet I think i give reassurance to louder friends that sounds big headed but I have been told I make people feel safe sure im not the life and soul but im a hoot fine to be around. Don't talk yourself down Op your friends like you for you.

Blue shoes you put that so well.

Because there's more to us than a personality. It can come through more when the noise stops.

What they do say is more carefully chosen.

That may be true but it isn’t always true.

Being a naturally quiet person doesn’t automatically make someone wise, or kind or thoughtful.

chatty = very, very bad

Chatty is not the same as loud.

Your friends simply enjoy your company OP! Don't over think it!