'D'p has his priorities wrong?!

[Polkadot1502]

Aibu to be really pissed off about this?
Partner is football mad and I feel it comes first!! Would anyone else put up with this or am I being harsh?

• 3 days after emergency c section he goes out to football leaving me to look after myself and 3 day old Dd when I could barely stand let alone walk properly.
• I had mastitis felt horrendous like that had flu and my boob was sheer agony, found it painful to lift dd... out he goes to football.
• Dd now 1 unwell go to doctors with partner doctor says she has a chest infection, so poorly she doesn't know what to do with herself... off he goes to football
• yesterday Dd has temperature and generally unwell ( she had diary and could have been that as she's dairy intolerant but not sure ) whilst his playing his game of football Dd is breathing different to usual I call ooh doc, he comes home from football and we go to the ooh docs.

He doesn't see an issue with it but I think his being unfair to us so mumsnet jury what do you think?

That’s a very poignant and sad post flynn

3 or 4 nights a week?

I'd say he was having a laugh but it's not actually funny.

Are there matches on weekends too?

So tonight I told partner I was leaving and would stay at my mums with dd for bit and guess where he is??
Yep football! I'm packed and ready to leave with our dd !

Well he is certainly clear on what he wants isn’t he!

Go to your mums and plan a happy and secure life for you and DD On to cms first thing.

Also organise contact.

Let him see what his life is going to be like from here on in.

Well done Polkadot. Make it a very long stay at your mum's.

He’s a grade a prick, enjoy your mums. I wouldn’t be in any rush to go home.

Seriously???? Get to your mums quicksharp! He's being a total cuntybollocks what a fucking arse

Didn't think he'd go but out he went begging me to be here when he got home

If he was that desperate for you to be there, he'd not have gone out in the first place. I reckon you should still go, he still put football first.

Wow just wow. Think that’s a pretty good indication of where his priorities lie. Go to your mums and start thinking about the next steps to getting rid of this man child.

Didn't think he'd go but out he went begging me to be here when he got home
Hahaaa really. I hope youd rather be slowly boiled in oil than there when he gets home.

Didn't think he'd go but out he went begging me to be here when he got home

Yeah. No.

Fucking soccer!! It's crazy how it comes first in so many people lives. Turning adults into toddlers with tantrums if their teams don't win.

I don't have time for it and never will. Hope it all works out on your own. He can't see it's destructive and obviously doesn't care.

I was going to say that the instances where your DD was a bit poorly and he went off to play football aren’t so bad (the post csection and mastitis issues however would not have gone down well AT ALL). Then I read your update where you said he plays 3-4 times a week. That’s madness. He needs to cut back. He has a family now, he can’t be so selfish. When do you get a break?

Agreed!^

Did you leave OP? I hope it wasn’t an empty threat.

He’ll play the victim, but don’t fall for it. If he was committed to a partnership with you and fatherhood he would be cancelling all and any plans to spend time with you to work things out. He’s selfish and will never be able to see that his behaviour has been appalling, so you’ll just end up feeling more and more resentful. Enjoy a stay with your mum while you work out a plan for you and your lovely DD. Good luck.

You told him you were leaving him and he still went to play football!

Presumably he didn't want to let the team/his mates down but couldn't get it through his thick skull that his priorities are completely wrong.

Sorry OP he has shown you how he really feels, go to your Mum's and start planning your future, I know (from experience) how hard it is to take that first step.

so he wants to talk but only after football? oh my god

I hope you have left him

Is your house rented or owned

I’m sorry but I laughed when I read “Out he went begging me to be here when he got back.” He really doesn’t have a fucking clue does he?

Wow. He's saying you're leaving me because I prioritise football, please don't leave me but I'm off to football. What. A. Dick. He clearly wasn't sorry then, just empty words. And any apology he'll do now (after football) again will be empty words. He won't mean it.

Any begging messages to give him a other chance, why not reply with this handy picture - a language he understands!