Feeling trapped at work due to family situation

[MandalaYogaTapestry]

Hi all. Would be grateful for any thoughts.

Have been in my job for 8 years. Every year at the annual appraisal I have been asking to give me more responsibilities. Not even managing others (not possible in our office structure) just to do something else apart from my current duties. I am usually done with whatever I have to do by 2 pm. Half of my work day I am browsing Internet.

Have never had big f**ck-ups in my time here. Not asking for more money. Just for some development. Every year I get promised it and nothing happens.

Now for the dilemma. My salary pays for our children's schools. The elder one is doing GCSEs, the younger has started secondary. So not a good time to switch schools.

At the same time, being at work is a struggle. Also had a major fallout with a colleague which is not helping.

I am not sure I will be able to find a job which would pay as much. So I guess the question is what can I do to bear those few remaining years without going crazy and depressed.

I learnt this morning that my idea of what else I could do has fallen through so feeling completely down.

You look for another job! Saying you won't find a job that pays as much as defeatist!

Do you mean the job pays your children's school fees?

Stay at your job but do some studying after noon . In stead of asking managed ask for courses . Get as many course done as you can so when you leave you have other options.

Antigon, yes that pays enough to cover the fees

Anyone else stays in an unsatisfying job? How do you make peace with it?

If you are openly spending your afternoons twiddling your thumbs, then I would consciously fill the time.

Take a class. A slow job can be great for studying. It can be career oriented or just personal interest.

Read books
Write a novel.
Learn a language.

purple is it really ok to do that in your paid time? If colleagues come over to my desk they will see that i am doing something not job-related, regularly.

Obviously not but you said from 2pm you just browse the internet anyway, so this wouldn’t be any different to the current situation just more personally productive!

Look for a new job at home in the evening. This isn't difficult.

If the training will help you in your job I wouldn't feel bad about doing it in work time providing everything else is done.

sushi the job is quite niche. Which is why I won't be able to find another one with the same salary. But that's the minimum I neee for next 2.5 years at least

I used to study at my desk in my slow job a few years ago. Was frowned upon, but I didn’t care

I think you should either study or find a new job.

Sorry it was meant for aquamarine

I would look for a new job. There may be one out there that pays the same money, but will stretch you more. And keep your existing job until you find one.
Also consider moving your eldest into the state system for Sixth Form. If you no longer have his/her school fees to pay, you wouldn't necessarily need a job paying as much.

mouse I've been doing this job for 8 years, there is no more training I could so which would be related to this particular position

Leeds that's true and I did think about it. But he is in one of the best schools in the country, it would be a shame to pull him out and he loves it

Why do you think you wouldn't find a job which pays enough for the school fees?

Finding another job while employed is much easier than after leaving and it will tell you whether there is scope for more pay in the role. I would think about the next responsibility/job you want in the current organization that might also help get a job elsewhere and see if you can do anything for training while at work. See about what the next problem to be solved at work it. There is always something to be done/improved and since you have the time it might lead to that next greater responsibility you want.
As for me, learned the City Slickers "One Thing" so can keep doing what I don't like forever.

quartzy i don't have a vocation. Was lucky to come across this position but I don't have much to offer to a prospective employer which would warrant this kind of salary

Well if you think you have nothing to offer then no, you won't find anything else. All jobs have transferrable skills. If we had an idea of what you do then we could suggest alternatives. Salary expectation? Do you have a DP/H/W who works or could work to make up any shortfall if you leave for slightly less wage even in the short term?

That's one of the reasons why I have tried hard to expand my duties - in order to learn something new, to become potentially more employable

But what do you do at the moment?

Perhaps reframe the situation. You’re in a role that you can do easily and pays well but you’re bored and would like more challenge and responsibility. However that job and the pay it provides allows children to have a great education. So maybe you choose to look for an alternative but if you can’t something that enables you to continue to provide that education, rather than thinking “I’m stuck”, you can make a conscious and positive choice to remain in the role for the benefit of your Children. And when that cost driver goes you will be free to do other things.

TheMobile i do have a husband so he would provide for the family if I were to find myself between the jobs. His salary won't stretch to any part of the school fees though.

What do you offer your current employer to justify your salary? I find it odd that they'd pay you if you don't have skills!

How about starting something on the side and building it up into a different role? What would you like to do if money weren't a consideration? What skills in particular are you trying to gain from your current employer if they offered you more responsibility?

TheMobile I'd rather not be specific about what I do. But it's a niche job which pays well due to where I work. In another place it would command a significantly lower salary because it's very unlikely that I will be utilising the knowledge and skills which are required here. Sorry for being vague.