To hate it when people say they'd love to spend Christmas alone?

[Ruckup]

I had to, for many, many years. It was awful and I nearly ended it. Shut off from everything and everybody and tbh i still don't much like christmas now.

I see the crap about christmas alone on here and I'm sorry, I think it's bull.

When I was on my own I didn't have a DH. I still enjoyed the day.

I can appreciate you and others might feel lonely but I don't understand why you are so defensive about others saying they aren't and enjoy their time alone.

Oh FFS I do actually give up. It's another race to the bottom my story is more worthy than yours thread and I got sucked in

OP you have no idea what you are talking about. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes and then you might understand. Too many assumptions on your part.

You are being ridiculous.

I loved Christmas on my own. A special day - peaceful, fun, happy. Why shouldn't I say that just because you didn't like it.

This is my dad! He hates having people around Xmas. We've come to a set up of every other Yr we go there..with siblings then the following Yr he has day on his own with an egg sandwich.
I hate the thought of it. But his choice he's a grown man. We go boxing day instead.
He only accepts the alternate yrs as I have a dependant sister who is there alternate yrs.
He also refuses to come here or anywhere.

It is nearly always rude and insensitive to say "I'd love to X" if you bring it up as something you're being forced to do but don't want to.

They're not lying though.

People who think they would like it, often would like it.

I see the crap about christmas alone on here, and I'm sorry, I think it's bull
Think whatever you want, your opinions and experiences are no more valid than anyone elses.

Like others have said there’s a difference between someone genuinely choosing to be alone and people making that comment when they realise you’re alone.
I have no close family alive. Very few friends who live local. And the friends I do have have their own families. So when one of those with a loving family say they’d “rather be me because it sounds so relaxing” etc it does hurt. So I get what the OP means. I used to love Christmas with all my family and I’d give anything to have another full on busy Christmas Day. Instead it’s just me now.

I once got talked into spending Christmas with a family because they wouldn't accept I wanted to be alone and 'how awful it would be'. Never again, I hated it and was so much happier on my own. I think the OP is one of 'those' people who can only project their own life onto others.

I don't like Christmas because it brings back traumatic memories. I participate because I do it for my dc. I saw a time when I wouldn't have to do it anymore but now most are adults (youngest is nearly sixteen) they all come home and I still have to participate. I dream of the day I get to spend it alone and can ignore it all tbh so YABU some people would happily spend Christmas alone.

YABU! I’ve met plenty in my life who aren’t people people, and would rather be at home alone than sat round the house of a relative or acquaintance they barely tolerate.

This always makes the Grinch in me smile every December.

Why are you alone? Invite someone or go out. Lots of pubs and restaurants all budgets doing Xmas lunch, volunteer, go for a walk, loads of options. It's just one day. I hate it too, but no need to be alone if you don't want unless you are housebound, even then I bet you could find a volunteer to visit.

I can see both sides. It's lovely to spend Xmas day with your husband and children. It's also a nice idea to completely chill out all Xmas day eating ferreo rochers and Pringles. Watching what ever t.v you want, without having anyone to run around for!!

As long as it's what they want and do so through choice, then what is wrong with wanting to be alone on Christmas day? As someone who enjoys my own company, I really don't understand other people's fears of being alone.

Is this more of a complaint about people who don't appreciate the friends and family that they have around them? Who moan about having to go to Aberdeen to see great aunt so and so and would rather be alone on the day instead?

Ruckup ... I think I understand where you are coming from. I have never spent a Christmas alone. My Christmas's have always been a mixture of spending time with family and friends for pleasure and doing the family duty stuff. It's easy to sigh deeply about the family duty stuff and feel it would be great to get out of some of it and spend the time alone but this is very different to having no choice about it year in year out.

At this time of year it must be particularly galling to have people in my situation who never experience no choice about being alone at Christmas telling you that they would 'love' that. It is fine if being alone at Christmas is a personal choice ..but that is not what you are
talking about are you.

I am sorry that being alone at Christmas used to make you want to 'end it' and I hope you have the Christmas of your choice this year.

Maybe we should all be more sensitive to those around us. Especially those alone at Christmas. Maybe some prefer it that way but there will be others who just say this out of being too proud to admit to their profound sense of loneliness over this period.

Depends on the circumstances I suppose, I spent from 18 through all my 20s alone at Christmas and I absolutely loved it. It was quiet and peaceful compared to Christmases growing up, my first Christmas alone was in university halls and I remember thinking how brilliant it was, I made myself a full christmas dinner and really enjoyed Christmas for the first time.

YABVU. Some people honestly don't care about it, it's just another day. Some people have been bereaved and for them Xmas will never be the same and they'd rather be on their own for it (I have a mate who lost her only child and she prefers to spend the day alone). All sorts. You sound very bitter and hateful and I hope you can get some help with that.

Well done for everyone being sensitive.
When you’re lonely, it’s very easy to say take up a hobby or enjoy a relaxing bath.
If people are too stupid to realise that the op is saying it through the pain of being alone and not wanting to be alone and then told by others how they can’t bear all the hustle and bustle and cooking for 10 etc
Then empathy is something you need to work on

I truly love being alone at Christmas! I've often worked Christmas day, so Christmas day alone at home wearing fluffy pjs and eating mince pies is my perfect day!

I think what OP is trying to say is that it's different wanting to spend Xmas alone, or having a partner who can't be with you but would be to finding yourself alone because there is no one. It's a time of year where if you are very isolated and lonely it can hit you like a ton of bricks that you have no-one. Choosing to spend it alone or knowing you are alone through circumstances but being loved and 'wanted' is different. I think.

@Holdingonbarely nobody has to be alone at Christmas if they are able to leave the house - as a pp said, there are pubs and restaurants open, lots of volunteers needed at various places, and a scheme where you invite some other lonely person to spend the day with you.

I love having Christmas alone.

It’s not that I don’t love my parents and family and friends, or wish they didn’t exist, I just don’t like Christmas and don’t want to celebrate it. That’s not hard to understand is it?

@RyderWhiteSwan
I think that would class you as one of those people that doesn’t understand the difference between being alone and debilitating affect of loneliness.

"Bitter and hateful"? Bit harsh!

Fucking hell, I'd rather drink my own urine than "find some other lonely person to spend the day with"

You can feel even more unwanted in those situations. Which shows people really don't get it.