Husband sending weird messages - not sure if I am overreacting

[BlueskiesLonglies]

So my husband is at the rugby and I've been home with our toddler. DH is rugby mad and it was a last minute decision he was going to the rugby with a mate. This I have absolutely no issue with. He doesn't go out often, doesn't drink a lot, and I have no complaints about our relationship. However, as I suspected, he has decided to go out drinking after the game. He has sent me a photo from FB of three girls I used to work with, who I was friendly with, and for various reasons I won't go into I am NOT friends with now. Under the photo he has wrote - three fannies. I wrote back - where did you get this ? Do you think it's funny ?
I have blocked these girls from Facebook.
He wrote back, Facebook thought it was funny.
I said why would it be funny ? You are meant to be out with friends drinking not trawling through FB and screenshotting pics of MY excolleagues who I don't even work with now and you know how I feel about ! Why would you waste headspace or time on them ?

Am I being over sensitive because of how I feel about these girls or is it a bizarre message ? How would you all feel ?

I just don't understand why, when he is out drinking with mates, he is pissing about screenshotting photos from FB and sending them to you

Bizarre

Hes trying to have a laugh with you. You have acted weirdly. You sound a barrel of laughs.

I think it is bizarre. I can't say I would be too impressed and would let him know that when he was sober enough to give a coherent response.

Until then I doubt I would pay him any attention. It would just irritate me too much.

I'm not normal. I don't try to be. But my dh wouldn't behave like that. So you don't need to be concerned about me being controlling.

I do think it’s weird that he’s out with his mates and trawling fb

You're overreacting to a drunk, silly text

I think it's cute in a weird way that while drunk he thinks he'll be funny by mocking people you don't like... He could be doing anything while drunk and yet sees a photo of them and thinks 'Oh, those people wife doesn't like. I know, I'll call them FANNIES ha ha ha that will show them' in a really lame, pointless drunken revenge/being on your side thing.

He could be trawling pictures of attractive women to say 'haha she's fit!' or doing any other idiotic thing but he's siding with you in a conflict, albeit in an idiotic way.

I would assume the photo came up on his timeline (maybe a friend of his liked it) and he just screenshot it and sent it to you, with the accompanying message meaning ‘three idiots’ in what he thought was solidarity with you (I’m guessing there was some sort of falling out from what you’ve said). It was drunken and misguided but I do think you overreacted, and were a bit odd.

Cross post Rixera but a very similar opinion!

I don’t get the issue, he’s obviously seen the pic on social media and is taking the piss out of them because he knows you don’t like them?

When I’m out I’d look at Facebook, if my pals were out the toilet etc, that’s not odd.

Seems like he’s seen the pic, knowing you no longer talk to these women sent it to you. I don’t find it that odd tbh. It’s a private message between you and your husband.

Unless the reason you don’t talk to them is that one of them had an affair with your dh then I think you are over reacting.

He thinks these people are twats. He thought you'd be amused. He's trying, possibly misguidedly, to check in with you in a light-hearted way.

Personally I'd wonder why the hell he was bothering with FB when he's meant to be enjoying a few post-match drinks, but that's just me being stuffy about over-using phones in a social context.

I'd just laugh because he's calling them idiots. I can't see anything wrong, except your huge over reaction.

I think its weird personally.

Now that calling people fannies in Scotland means idiots, it makes perfect sense. He’s Drunk texting you that he’s got your back.

Yes I feel better about it now, thanks everyone. I'm maybe a bit over sensitive with dc2 on the way and not sleeping well at the moment.

In my experience rugby=pissed.

Why the hell would you be on facebook when you're out with your mates.

One of them probably popped up as a suggested friend and had this pic as a profile.
I had often goog giggle about facebook friend suggestions

Sounds like he was scrolling through FB and they came through on his feed. He knew you disliked them so called them idiots on screenshot to you. If that's the case I would have replied, yes they are aren't they? I don't know what you are cross about unless you think he has become their FB friend knowing how you feel about them.

It sounds like the behaviour of a 14-year-old, but I also think you’ve overreacted. He probably thought you would laugh, and clearly misjudged it.

Some very serious, pompous people on this thread. Do you never have a joke with your DH and call someone a twat privately between you?

Oh if it means idiots then that's fine. I thought he was being a perv .

Why the hell would you be on facebook when you're out with your mates

Sounds normal to me. Only takes seconds really.

Oh I forgot that "fannies" doesn't have the same meaning in England! It's his first night out in a long time so I'll put it down drunk banter!