When a man (let’s face it, it is generally a man) fucks off leaving a woman holding the baby, do the man’s parents have a responsibility towards the welfare of that child?
This is regardless of whether they ‘get to see the child or not’.
In my case, after a couple of years my ex decided that actually, he didn’t want to be a parent after all. He registered as self employed so as not to have to pay anything towards his child, then finally left the country altogether. He has a sister here and I have encouraged dc to have a relationship with those cousins and she’s nice enough. I generally communicate with her. His parents have never made direct contact with me. A couple of times dc has spent a half term with them having travelled with other cousins and either the grandparents or his sister have paid.
I know they are quite well off and they have bought dc an iPad and on another occasion some clothes for Christmas but that’s twice in a decade.
My aibu is am I being unreasonable to take a rather dim view of the whole family. If my son had a child and took no responsibility for it I would see that as a failure on my part to instil morals and I would pay for at least swimming lessons, tuition, SOMETHING on a regular basis, to ease the burden on the person doing the day to day care.
He has another sister who lives an hours drive away and has visited dc about 3 times in her life. I find that poor.
Am I being unfair?
I’ve given them al every opportunity to be involved but it appears to be too much effort for all of them apart from the one sister.