AAIBU about ballet exam?

[Dramaticmuch]

Feeling annoyed with ballet teacher regarding ballet exam booking. At the point we were asked if our 5 year old could be booked into her first ballet exam, we were told it would be in November, please pay X amount. For the past few years, 5 year old has had the odd Saturday lesson cancelled as other pupils needed the slot for their exams. Fine. So far, so good. With a couple of weeks notice, we have had a letter asking us to take 5 year old out of school and half way across town to a different school with no parking available, for her exam. I feel as though it would have been REALLY USEFUL to know that the exam may be on a school/work day, and in a different location before we paid, rather than now, when it's all a done deal and our options are to go along with this somehow, or lose the exam fee. I have asked if it could be booked for an out of school slot and been told no. Show up or child misses out and we lose the booking fee. Ballet teacher has sent a non-apology that she is 'sorry I didn't realise it would be on a school day'. How would I have 'realised'? I'm not psychic! She also booked all our kids into a summer dance club a few months back then sent me an email to say she'd got the dates on her leaflet wrong and wasn't running the club that week, leaving all 3 kids disappointed, so I'm a bit naffed off with her crappy level of communication! Grrr.

Really bizzare to have it on a school day. My son attends Taekwando on a Sunday and their grading is done at the weekend. We had our session cancelled a few weeks back due to grading but arranged an extra one to make up for this.

I would have expected anything to be in the evenings or weekends due to school

it seems there is a level of assumed common knowledge that I just don't have yet, I think!

DD is 12 and has been dancing/doing exams since she was 4. There is no hope if I've not learnt it by now!

I've danced my whole life and now my daughter does.

Dance exams are like driving tests. That's your slot and that's it and yes, most are during the school week.

Due to this, you'll find that you won't get a fine and the very few that have, have been able to contest it easily.

I think DD's dance school must book a whole day of exams - the examiner comes to the hall they use and seems to spend the whole day there.

I understand OP. It's that assumed knowledge thing.

I know the ropes now as I've been a parent for 19 years, but there have been many times when I was like "how the hell was I meant to know that?" with things. Sure, I need to take responsibility as a parent, but being told "Oh, it's always been like that" just makes you feel a bit crap as a parent new to an activity or the school system or baby health clinics and what have.

Also, as for character shoes they are the shoes used for the character section of the exam which usually involves dancing from other cultures (e.g Russian, polish).

Find a local dance supplier/shop take the letter of what's needed and they can help you.

You've probably only heard about Saturday exams as they clashed with your daughters class. In reality, several exams will take place throughout that week, it's just during the school day, there aren't really classes on to be cancelled

Yes, it is very similar to school with assumed knowledge!

Soup, I think our dance school must do the same with booking a whole day.

One I remember for some reason is that our school includes the Foundation/Reception year when they refer to Key Stage 1.

They announced the times for the KS1 disco. I had thought that the foundation class went as well, but knew that that class is not part of KS1. So I wasn't sure. I checked with the school and I felt they thought I was trying to make a point about semantics. I really wasn't - I just didn't understand.

Check she actually needs character shoes first. It could be a generic letter to all and if she is only 5 then chances are she’ll be doing primary ballet which if it is RAD doesn’t have any character in it - that comes in at grade 1. Other exam boards may vary but I would do a double check first.

I would cancel the exam. There is no way I would be putting a small child through additional exams or (given she doesn't understand what it is yet) sending my small child to perform in a strange new place in the middle of the school day.

Kids should be enjoying activities, and enjoying improving their skills. Doing things to get badges and pass exams is a terrible precedent to set for your children....the school system will do enough of that damage for you...don't compound it!

It is interesting that those whose children are older and involved in performing arts exams etc think it's unreasonable not to know all the stuff they themselves already know. How did you all discover the things you now take for granted?

Well, when my child's music teacher said we'd be given a date for her first exam in (say) November, I took that to mean simply a date in November, and we'd be advised of the venue,and didn't assume that she actually meant to say a Saturday in November at the usual venue.

It's really obvious to anyone who gives it any thought, that examiners work across all days, and many locations. It's not logical to assume that they only work on Saturdays, or will only be examining students from one particular dance school on any given day.

The OPs statement that ALL exams have previously happened on a Saturday is likely an incorrect assumption too. Some may have, but unless she has been given a list all the exams everyone has taken with dates, times and venues, then she really can't know whether they all have - and it's really extremely unlikely.

The problem here is that the dance teacher said one thing, and OP assumed they meant something else. That's not a problem with the dance teacher, it's about the OP making assumptions.

As PP have said, I would try to find a friendly dance supplier and ask them to help you. Even if it is online, some give good telephone advice.

Ideally I would try to speak to the teacher and asked her / him if they are linked to or can recommend a dance shop.

Firstly she won't need character shoes until Grade 1 and the minimum age for Grade 1 is 7, she would have been wearing them every week for classes if she was doing Grade 1.

Secondly it is very common for dance, music and drama exams to be on a weekday. A few exam boards allow teachers to book Saturdays only but not RAD.

Having to travel to a different venue will either be because the dance studio is not large enough for the board requirements, or the teacher does not have enough students so is combining with another school.

Saying that it would have been useful if the teacher had communicated that. I have usually had a letter stating that your dd/ds is ready for an exam, this will take place during the month of X between the hours of Y at Z location but the exact date and time will not be known until approx 2 weeks beforehand (when the exam board notifies the teacher).

all exams at this school since we started have happened on Saturdays

If that's the case then you made a natural assumption and the teacher should have been careful to give you the right info. She sounds terrible at communication and 'sorry I didn't realise it would be on a school day'' is an appallingly snitty non-apology.

I'd go and see her and throw my weight around, personally. Remind her that exams at this school have always happened on Saturdays – inconveniencing your child and presumably others.

I'd ask for a refund and go elsewhere.

I suggest you talk to her teacher or to some of the other parents who might know more, but I don't think she needs character shoes - these are for the character dance from Grade 1 RAD ballet upwards and you're supposed to be at least 7 to take Grade 1 (she'd also need a character skirt). I'm assuming since she's 5 that she's doing Pre-Primary. She will need an approved ballet uniform leotard (might be a fixed colour for your dance school depending on how fussy they are), ballet shoes and pink ballet socks. RAD is not the only exam board, but I think it's the most popular one for ballet.

If you want to check this there are lots of youtube videos (google RAD pre-primary and see if the music sounds familiar - the dances might not match exactly what she does because some are set by the teacher).

If there are enough candidates for the exam/exams then you can have an examiner come out to your studio, which might be why they've run sessions on a Saturday before.

Hopefully, they'll do some lessons on exam techniques before the actual exam - maybe a mock where the teacher pretends to be the examiner and explains what she's expected to do on the day. I think in Pre-primary the teacher can actually go into the exam with them.

Find out from the teacher if there's a Facebook group for your dance school or a newsletter. It doesn't seem like they're very good at communicating.

Is it RAD? They can't do exams before turning 7, so this will be a 'certificate' and kind of pointless really.

My daughters have completed grade 1 and were too young for the exam so will skip it and take grade 2 the next time the exams come around.

They have worn character shoes and skirts all the way through Grade 1, and had random things like a watering can for props.

@M3lon cancelling is a little OTT and these exams can actually be helpful.

Doing them regular at dance growing actually helped me to become less phased about exams in general meaning I was a lot calmer than some for my GCSE.

It's also a good way of teaching studying before hand (classes and practicing at home) as well as learning about honouring commitments you've made.

My dd exams both dance and music were on school days.
We've never been given a saturday exam, do the examiners work on saturday?
You just have to keep your ears open at these small schools, we were never told anything either.
Find yourself a parent whose child has been there for a few years, they'll know.

DramaticMuch
Can you get the time off work? What are the implications if your dd takes the exam later? Will she be leaving her classmates behind if she takes it or will they leave her behind if she doesn’t? How does your dd feel about the exam?

Tbh there is very little stress and pressure on the children in my experience at dds dance school as they teach the children the steps inside out. The only caveat for your dd is that it’s in a different location.

cjt
Martial arts exams are often done internally up to a certain grade. Not so with dance. This is a large, well oiled machine.

DarlingNikita
No way is op going to get anywhere asking for a refund from the exam board.

I agree with others- DD has been dancing for 14 years. And sat dozens of exams.
Almost all of them have been during school hours- but school has always been fine.

You'll need to check what uniform she needs if you don't know already.
We had ribbons on/off, satin ballet shoes and socks just for the exam, then back to leather shoes and tights for classes.

Character shoes aged five?! What? I'd be looking for a new dance school.

OP, I know a bit about how it all works as I did ballet myself. My girls are at a school the follows the ISTD syllabus and my eldest did her first exam at 6. 5 does feel very young.

The school sounds a bit rubbish.

Interestingly, we've just left a music school for the same reason. Really unfriendly staff, really really poor communication. You seemed to have to be on the "inside" to understand what was going on. We found another provider with which we're much happier.

Gosh, this is bringing back memories, the hair as well.
I can do a bun in about a minute now. I still have the hair nets and of course the paler brown hair grips as they had to match the hair.

Actually as Thesnobby said, in general I do think exams can be helpful. I am pretty used to tests and exams (not dancing ones myself!) and it certainly helps when you need to do them in other areas of life if you are used to managing your nerves, etc.

No experience of ballet, but the music exam forms make it very clear where your exam centre is and that your exam will be anytime between x date and y date. I take it there is nothing similar on the ballet exam forms?

I do agree it may not have been spelled out as it's assumed as common knowledge - but equally OP could have checked.