To want heads on platters? Utterly inappropriate school assembly

[Renarde1975]

This is a fucking corker. I am fuming but I'd like the hive minds' view.

At DS assembly today. Topic is 'Evacuation: WW2'. All good. Actually, they've done a great job and it's really excellent. Then this.

Towards the end, Christine Aguilera's 'Candyman' comes on. I'm watching open mouthed. I still cannot believe it.

MN: let me refresh you on the 'choicest' lyrics.

He's a one stop shop, makes the panties drop

He took me to the Spider club on Hollywood and Vine
We drank champagne, and we danced all night

He's a one stop shop, makes my cherry pop

And no, MN - this was NOT the radio edit.

And then to cap it all off for some inexplicable reason we are treated to two renditions of Don't Stop Believin' by Journey

A singer in a smoky room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on, and on, and on

WTAF? Did I smoke crack this morning and enter into a parallel dimension? I am a teacher, that another member of my profession could fuck up so royally is just, wow.

I don't want my nine year old son to be singing this in a school assembly, or listening to words that objectify women and glorify alcohol. Turns out the kids were practicing the dance moves to Candyman for three weeks!

“Do you turn off the radio when don't stop believing comes on?”

“I do.
Because it's shit”

Now you’re just trolling.

It probably went right over their heads. I wouldn’t worry if I were you. At age 7, my cousins and I were cheerfully singing ‘Sex On The Beach’ by T-Spoon and it hasn’t scarred me in any way. If I recall correctly, my mum even bought us the CD.

OK MN - the title is deliberately inflammatory.

No - I was more thinking about having a quiet word with the teacher.

I don’t get the problem with don’t stop believing tbh, his 9 so I’m sure he knows people smoke and come on we’ve all smelt horrid cheap perfume from time to time.

Even candyman 🤷🏻‍♀️ again I’m not really getting the issue

Your that parent aren’t you? Or did you just need something to be offended by today?

kind of amused at all the "get a grip" replies. If that happened where I am, there would be a queue of parents complaining.

I doubt they will even listen to the lyrics let alone understand them. I have heard those songs loads of times and not given the words a thought. Think you are being a OTT.

I have a ten year old, who wouldn't have the faintest clue what 'make your panties drop' would mean, so she'd just ignore the lyrics. I think these kind of lyrics are worse when they know what they mean, not when they're too young to understand. So this wouldn't bother me.

I imagine the candy man lyrics will go over the children’s heads; they went over mine

I think this would make me uncomfortable to be honest but I couldn’t articulate why as my dcs wouldn’t appreciate what exactly the lyrics meant.

I would probably have a quiet word but I wouldn’t go in all guns blazing. I’ll save that for more serious issues.

pallisers

Intriguing!

I was revisiting my teenage years via Spotify the other day.

I listened to many of the songs time and time again as a teenager and sang along quite merrily. Turns out that whilst I knew the lyrics, I didn't actually hear them. One of the songs was about cheating on a partner and the subsequent regret, another was very similar.

I was 13/14 at the time and I just heard them as songs. I doubt a 9 year old will consider the meaning of the lyrics.

I'm wondering if your ds is your eldest, because if you get this hysterical over a couple of songs you're in for a hell of a time when he reaches his teens.

Even candyman 🤷🏻‍♀️ again I’m not really getting the issue

He's a one stop shop, makes the panties drop

He's a one stop shop, makes my cherry pop

Are people really happy with 9 year olds singing this? No issues at all?

My year 3 child (7) has recently had assemblies celebrating children's authors such as Lauren Child and Julia Donaldson and singing, 'I went to the animal fair' - it is a junior school and I think this is how it should be. I moved my DD from her previous school partly because they had this age inappropriate approach to assemblies, Christmas productions and a ridiculous talent contest that made those rejected feel 'talantless'- tacky, tacky, tacky! Not everyone's cultural references are Saturday night TV shows!

I would probably have a quiet word but I wouldn’t go in all guns blazing. I’ll save that for more serious issues.

No - not all guns blazing. You know, I have never felt the need to have 'a quiet word' before.

Maybe it's because I am also a teacher that I'm more than a bit surprised by the choice. The threat of complaints from parents really used to make me feel super anxious (I teach A Level primarily). Complaints against you are usually held on file somewhere and can be whipped out a moments notice.

This is why my sons teacher would’ve let year 6 children watch a pg film on their last day of school forever treat. Too hardcore apparently....... U only. I thought the teacher was mental but now I get it.

Yanbu - the music must have been chosen by somebody : it wasn’t like it was just passing through a shop/listening to the radio. I just think it was a stupid CHOICE and should be flagged up.

But that’s just me ....

Hey OP - say Candyman three times and see what happens!!

The teacher will laugh at you. Then they will talk about you in the staffroom and everyone will laugh at you and how utterly ridiculous you are.

As long as you're OK with this, go for it. We like a good laugh, us teachers.

Ha. I understand you, OP. Although I wouldn't be spitting feathers over Journey, I would definitely not be happy with Candyman at that age.

Mind you, I got the hump that my son's school happily allowed Uptown Funk - and was also told I was over-reacting (almost certainly correctly!) - because of the "funk you up" bit. I get that people funk up clothes, funk up their rooms etc. but "funk you up" just sounds entirely too close to "fuck you up" and I just wasn't comfortable with it. However, school said it was ok so it was allowed (and it IS a good dance song).

I'm with you, OP. I spent my dcs' primary years chuntering (to myself) about playing pop songs in assembly. Nothing wrong with pop songs. Without outing myself, this household's knowledge is extensive...

But, to limit pupils to (usually teachers' choice) bland chart music is sooooo frustrating. I did actually once mention this, and was shot down in flames with, "The children cannot access classical music."

Btw, my WTF moment was when in the Christmas show the children filed in to Fairytale of New York - let's all sing now, "You're a bum, You're a punk, You're an old slut on junk"

I'd object on the grounds Candyman is cod modern pop take on 1940s pop and not remotely authentic, it should have been the Andrews Sisters.

I do see your point, but the lyrics would have gone over the children's heads and they'll have forgotten them by next week.

1. I think you are totally over reacting.
2. I never turn the radio off. I don't think any lyrics are inappropriate. Only turn off YouTube etc for swearing.
3. You lost me at 'its rubbish'. Journey, Don't stop believing is on my top 50 list.

And, to be clear, I did NOT take that up with any of the school staff - it was a discussion with other parents that I had.

Yeah, I'd be unhappy enough to say something about Candyman OP, agreed. Am a bit at the posters who say the lyrics go over children's heads - mine can't be the only one who listens and asks? And yes 9 year olds know about sex but do they have to know about it in this soft porn ish way with talk of big cocks and panties dropping and whatever? Really?

I would also wince a bit at the other one but not say anything. I just think there are so bloody many songs in the world, why not choose something better? In terms of appropriateness and quality.