Friend declined my invite because she wanted “to have fun” !

[GhoolsGoblinsandGobshites]

AIBU to be a bit hurt by this ?

I have 2 DC aged 7 and 9.

Every year on Halloween , we have a party tea and play party games at home.

We dress up but we don’t go trick or treating as a) not many houses take part here and b) I feel uncomfortable about it.

I do take the DC to the neighbours we’re very good friends with who kindly give them sweets but that’s about it.

I also do mini party bags for the boys and get sweets in for any trick or treaters (we never get any !)

Both my boys seem to enjoy our Halloween.

I invited my elder son’s friend to join us today and told him what we had planned. His mum scoffed and said “oh no thank you, we want to actually have some fun !”

I don’t think she meant it menacingly but it stung a bit (competitive parenting rearing it’s head ?!) .

It’s got me thinking whether my boys are “missing out “ because we don’t trick or treat .

When I was a child, my siblings and me did it and enjoyed it but I feel differently now I’m older .

If we did decide to do it , we would probably have to walk for miles to find a house participating or drive to another area - which is ridiculous!

Does our Halloween sound rubbish?

The mother then turned up with her child to trick or treat at our house - They were passing in the car so thought they’d pop in!

Surely this is fine! I grew up somewhere quite rural, and so most of the halloween festivities I remember were parties - some small, some big - in private homes. We'd dress up and play the traditional games etc, but no trick or treating.

When we moved to a street with a lot of halloween-observant neighbours I trick-or-treated from 11-13 or so but I never felt I was missing out before that. If it works for you, and especially for DS, having a party at home is a perfectly nice way to celebrate! I really wouldn't worry that you are depriving them.

I’d have loved your party when I was little. We went trick or treating and I found it a bit awkward as a kid. I didn’t really enjoy it at all. Sounds like you’re doing great

That is such a rude thing to do, even if you don’t particularly want to attend something you make a polite excuse. And an absolute cheek to turn up & knock on your door .

I’ve never taken my DS trick or treating, although I always hand out sweets to children who come round. When he was 9 he did ask to go & DH took him but I think he (DS) thought the experience was so dreary that he never went again ! I’ve always given him some sweets & chocolates just to stay in !

My children would have loved to attend your party! She sounds a little rude.

Your tradition sounds like it works for you. She was rude.

You’re making an effort and that’s the main thing. How about inviting some. School pals next time or find our where everyone else guises. (Enough of this trick or treating...)

She was rude to answer like this. Your evening sounds lovely. Our family would love to join! I don’t understand trick or treating. It doesn’t exist where I from originally and I think it’s freezing and boring and pointless especially as we have very few family houses around here.

Does our Halloween sound rubbish?

Our Halloween when I was a child consisted of my dad turning off the living room lights, letting us have a coke float and a bowl of skips or wotsits to share and watching something like Casper on the tv.

We loved it. It was just me and my sister and dad. That was our Halloween party. We genuinely looked forward to it. We had no idea what anyone else did.

Your DC are having a blast. Please don’t worry about keeping up with the Joneses. You’re creating lovely traditions and hurting no-one. I think your DC will look back so fondly on these parties.

She's rude!

Gosh how rude of her.