Don't want baby to grow up

[Nocoletta]

How do I get past this feeling? My baby was born a week ago. I'm in awe. Baby is beautiful and I can't stop staring.

I'm not enjoying any of it however as I'm aware of the fact that baby is going to grow up and there will reach a time where he no longer needs me in the same way. Won't rest his head on my chest when he sleeps. Won't breastfeed. Won't make those wonderful little noises...

I so strongly feel down and sad about this and it is affecting my life and time with little one.

Is this normal? Will I always feel like this?

No abnormal, no. I remember feeling like this to an extent. Every development is amazing, but also a bit sad (I found). I'm quite a nostalgic person though so I think I'm inclined to this way of thinking!

I felt like this when my DD was a new born but after a few weeks I became fascinated with each new change and development as she grew and stopped feeling sad about the fact the she wouldn't be a teeny tiny little thing forever. Watching a baby grow and develop their own personality is fun. Even now that she's 6 and she's driving me batshit crazy most days, I'm in awe of her growing up process, her expanding vocabulary, her learning to be an emotionally intelligent little girl. It's all just as special as the new born stage. Different, but still special 

I remember crying as DD1 would never be 3 days old again. It’s completely normal, be kind to yourself and it will pass.

I felt like this!! In fact DS is 3 and a half months and it has lessened but still there - sometimes makes me cry. I think is just motherhood/the experience of a first baby.

Well theres other equally heart melting stuff to come. But yes I know what you mean.

It's totally normal to have weird sentimental feelings at a time in your life when you're at your most hormonal. Give yourself a break.

Are you feeling ok generally?

All I can say is, be happy she will develop and grow. My 3 year old has a rare syndrome and will be forever reliant on us for care. It's not the future I saw for either of us - it's hard.

However, I also fully remember wishing I could keep both of them teeny tiny forever so I'd say it's a normal feeling but now I'd give anything for my youngest to 'grow up'

I don't want my baby to grow up either, and he's 6.

This is one of the things about being a parent, I think. You're constantly torn between looking ahead and being excited about the next stage, and feeling the constant tug of nostalgia for the one that's passing by.

It will lessen though, the intensity you feel now. At one week, you're still a bag of hormones, sleep deprived and coming to terms with how different your life is. Don't expect too much from your emotions, just let them drift by. And if you don't pick up, talk to your health visitor.

Gosh, I'm the opposite. Nothing fills me with more love for DD than watching her learn new things. I couldn't wait for her to get out of the boring and relentless newborn stage! I promise, there's lots more fun to come OP. They get better and better.

CheeseCrackersAndWine

If its any consolation, children still cuddle up and rest on you when they are poorly /tired or when they fall asleep when you are carrying them :)

And I still enjoy a cuddle with my mum.
Congratulations by the way :)

Aw OP :) one word: hormones.

You'll always get nostalgic when they progress and reach milestones but you'll also be extra proud when they do.

It's totally natural like falling in love, well it is falling in love, so you get a bit of the fear but you'll be fine promise X

It's fabulous that you are appreciating your little one to this extent. I think what you describe is the ongoing pain of motherhood/parenthood, but I think you mostly get used to it and learn to ride along with it. Then at milestones it comes to the fore again, and bites you in the bum. It's part of the deal, I think.

Each stage comes with something even better!! In a few weeks he will smile when you walk into the room, a few weeks after he will laugh when you blow bubbles on his tummy, then he will walk to you and put his arms up to you, then he will say mummy and after a few years he will tell you he loves you for the first time and everything you feel now you will feel over and over again, the baby stage is brilliant! But nothing compares to your baby telling you they love you! He will need you for many many years to come :)

Completely understandable. I cried putting away DS's newborn clothes. Now he is nearly 7 months and I can't believe how much I am enjoying watching his development. I love him more every day. Every stage has its own magic I'm told!!

I felt this and have gone through it at every age and stage!

My dd1 who is 18 just left home for university. She comes home (same city, she wanted to move out) and we love to see her but we also let her choose when to come "home". And at 18.6, I'm delighted that I've raised a strong, confident young woman who is ready to leave home. Even though it seems like yesterday I was sitting in my kitchen feeding her.

Enjoy every stage for what it is. I'm currently loving the "how do you cook xxxx" phase!

Also, I felt so much pressure to "enjoy every moment" when they are a newborn. Have to say I enjoy him so much more since I stopped trying to savour every minute. As strange as that might sound.

Enjoy your wee newborn bubble! Mine are 16 and 21 and I don’t want them to grow up !

Didn't feel this so strongly with my first as I knew I would experience it again
But with my second and last baby I am really really REALLY struggling with this
I almost can't cope with the fact that I will never have a newborn again
I just try not to think about it

As others say, you'll also get more and more joy soon as they learn new things - from smiling to crawling to rolling their eyes at how deeply uncool you are

Is this your last baby? I didn't feel like this with my first (he was very unsettled and I just wanted him to grow up and get over colic), but have with my 4th and last, every milestone is bittersweet.

My first and possibly last. I just love him so much and can't believe he's going to get bigger. I'm in bits over it. Silly I know...

Put it this way @Nocoletta I was heartbroken when my baby started to grow, she is 2 now and i wouldn't ask for her to be a newborn again, she is so much fun and so clingy to me ! I just love her so much 😁

Before I had children I genuinely was quite cold and emotionless. Yet here I am crying because I remember how tiny her hands and feet were, it's only been 7 months

I cried today cos my 5year year old has to go to school when she wad a baby I was always stressed and found it tough but boy do I miss those days of lying in bed with her till 12 and always being with her she's an only child and I can't see it happening again. Just enjoy every day even the tried ones x

OP this is possibly understandable to people like belfast who are nostalgic and overwhelmed by producing a new human being whom you love so much. And congratulations. It's a lovely time!

But shake yourself out of it if you can - you want to enjoy every moment and day of their wonderful development without looking forward. You don't want to be that woman who babies and restricts their fast-growing child - and ends up being the MIL from hell because no one is every good enough for their son.