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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I know IABU

42 replies

BiscuitDrama · 27/10/2018 20:03

but I need confirmation.

DS, 8, reeled off to sister “I love you and brother and mummy and daddy and the cat and dog, but the cat and dog most of all”.

So I half jokingly said “you love the (unfriendly) cat more than me?”
He said he does.
I was childish/needy and then brought it up ten minutes later and asked again and yes, still the case. I haven’t reacted to it in front of him but I’m really upset. Either he prefers a pointless cat to me, or he’s a mean bugger who’s trying to upset me.

Confused
OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 27/10/2018 20:04

In the nicest possible way, you’re overthinking this Flowers

HoraceWimpIsThisYourLife · 27/10/2018 20:05

Yabu. I prefer my cats company over dh and the dc any day Grin

He probably doesn’t mean it and obviously does love you. Don’t take it to heart.

Nenic · 27/10/2018 20:05

My ds says he loves our dog more than us. I just laugh it off. He’s young

dontticklethetoad · 27/10/2018 20:07

My kids say things like this all the time. It wouldn't occur to me to be offended.

SoyDora · 27/10/2018 20:08

Bloody hell yes YABU

Bluntness100 · 27/10/2018 20:10

Gosh, have you something else going on with you, a back story? Most people would just laugh this off. It's a typical kid thing to say,

NoIsACompleteAnswerSometimes · 27/10/2018 20:10

My grandson said he loved mummy, daddy, the dog etc but he only liked me. When i asked why he only liked me rather than loved me, he said it was because I'm old and might die soon! I'm only 57!

Bluetrews25 · 27/10/2018 20:11

Try not to take it to heart! The cat never makes him go to bed or clean his teeth or go to school. Equally, it doesn't cook his food or buy his birthday presents or any of the other multiple things you do every single day. He will appreciate you properly in time. (And probably does now if he really thinks about it!) If nothing else, he is secure in the knowledge that you love him, or he would not dare to say that.

Blanchedupetitpois · 27/10/2018 20:12

Oh my god, he’s a kid. Kids aren’t capable of quantifying love. In fact no one is, but adults think they can. The cat is cute and animals are cool and it doesn’t tell him to tidy his room or eat vegetables. It doesn’t mean he really loves the cat more than you, or that he would choose the cat over you. He’s just a kid, and kids talk crap.

Also it’s slight mean of you to call your cat pointless. It’s not the cat’s fault your son prefers it to you Grin

WhiteDust · 27/10/2018 20:13

YANBU! He's 8 not 2. Was he trying to piss you off?

JeanPagett · 27/10/2018 20:17

Unless there's some big dripfeed about your mental health coming, this is bizarre. He's a kid, you are way overthinking this.

HarrietKettleWasHere · 27/10/2018 20:17

Oh my god, get a grip.

Racecardriver · 27/10/2018 20:18

He’s clearly just British.

Gronky · 27/10/2018 20:21

Look at it from his point of view: the cat doesn't tell him he can't do something because it's dangerous or prevent him from having a second/third dessert.

PristineCondition · 27/10/2018 20:24

I constantly tell my kids I love the hamster more than them.
Ive got a teen- the ham smells lessGrin

Original poster
BiscuitDrama · 27/10/2018 20:25

Crikey, just as well I don’t have any mental health problems.

The cat is pretty pointless actually. She’s not very present.

OP posts:
PrincessWire · 27/10/2018 20:25

Get a grip OP!

Gronky · 27/10/2018 20:28

The cat is pretty pointless actually.

Evidently, your DS disagrees. It's rather fortunate that the overall value of a person, animal, plant or item isn't based upon the perceptions of one individual, imagine if yours were based exclusively on your DS's perceptions.

JellyBears · 27/10/2018 20:35

Is this lighthearted? Bless my 2 year nanny charge told her mum she liked me better because I let her have an extra marshmallow. Lol then she told me later she liked mummy better then me because I said no to tv until later!

AllTakenSoRubbishUsername · 27/10/2018 20:38

Of course the cat is not his top favourite. You are his world. But you've done such a good job of it that he just accepts it as his solid foundation - it hasn't even occurred him to question it. He would be lost without it. Take it as a compliment.

SirGawain · 27/10/2018 20:38

He's 8 OP, cut him some slack!

ShackUp · 27/10/2018 20:42

'Men love women, women love children and children love hamsters'...

puppymouse · 27/10/2018 20:42

Pretty sure I might love my horse and my dog a bit more than DH. Pretty sure DH knows this. My DD told me she didn't like me today. Pretty sure she didn't mean it.

You're way overthinking this.

daisypond · 27/10/2018 20:43

To be honest, I would expect a child to say they love their cat/dog more than they do their parent. It's hard to understand what "love" means at that age. They can stroke their pets, hold them in their laps, hide under the duvet with them, play with them, whisper secrets and sweet nothings to them. I'd say it's a good sign that a child loves their pet a lot. Love and relationships with people, especially adults, especially parents, are more complex.

Armchairanarchist · 27/10/2018 20:44

He's eight!

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