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I know IABU

42 replies

BiscuitDrama · 27/10/2018 20:03

but I need confirmation.

DS, 8, reeled off to sister “I love you and brother and mummy and daddy and the cat and dog, but the cat and dog most of all”.

So I half jokingly said “you love the (unfriendly) cat more than me?”
He said he does.
I was childish/needy and then brought it up ten minutes later and asked again and yes, still the case. I haven’t reacted to it in front of him but I’m really upset. Either he prefers a pointless cat to me, or he’s a mean bugger who’s trying to upset me.


OP posts:

GreenDinosaur · 27/10/2018 20:45

My DS loves our cat best in the world.

Our cat can't stand DS! 😾


BigRoundPumpkin · 27/10/2018 20:50

My son said he preferred his tablet to me!!! :) they r just kids!! (Usually I'd just move on to the next discussion, what lego man did this or that or why sharks are not green etc... However, on that particular day it actually led into quite a long discussion about the differences between toys/tablets/material things and love! We discussed mummy always being around and there for him etc... We talked about what would happen if mummy wasn't there vs if tablet wasn't there etc... and it was a really nice discussion I think, which helped him understand a little bit about love and about our relationship and how I will always be there for him and always love him :) (he probably still prefers tablet to me!!!! Halloween Smile) Don't sweat it OP! He's a kid :) he doesn't mean it!!!


LadyBathory · 27/10/2018 20:55

Don’t stress x my lil sis was insistent the cat was her sister too godamn everything was twinklesis this etc her password usernames onwards drove me mad. But in the end it’s a phase x


Duck90 · 27/10/2018 20:56

An 8 year old boy that loves his cat! I think that it shows good character. He has identified that the cat is vulnerable, and possibly that you don’t like the cat.


FiveGoMadInDorset · 27/10/2018 20:58

I have a friend who has a chocolate brownie business, they are amazing, DS always tells me he loves them more than me, I did offer him to her but she declined


redstararnie76 · 27/10/2018 21:05

If you asked my son who he loved more, me or the cat, he would 100% say the cat - it isn't that he doesn't love me, but I'm there all the time and he doesn't have to think about me, and I wouldn't want him to (he would say the cat because our other cat died and he's scared that something will happen to 'his' cat).
You have to expect a happy, well-adjusted child to take us for granted really, in that sense - you wouldn't want it to be otherwise, as that would indicate that they are insecure....


Ellisandra · 27/10/2018 21:09

I’ve been lower down the “love” list than an iPhone. 🤷🏻‍♀️
At least your cat is an individual actual living thing.

It didn’t upset me.


FusionChefGeoff · 27/10/2018 21:11

Oh God DH does this (worries about DC saying stuff) and it drives me mad.

You're the adult, don't be a needy child!


snowgirl1 · 27/10/2018 21:12

When I was a child I can remember my DF saying 'I think you love that cat more than me'. I didn't answer because I did, at the time. As others have said, the cat didn't force me to eat vegetables that I hated, didn't tell me off for mucking around at bedtime etc. etc. AND was cute, furry and sat on my lap/slept on my bed. I do love my Dad and we have a good relationship, but at that time the cat was nicer. Try not to be hurt by it, it's just how a child's mind works.


GreatDuckCookery6211 · 27/10/2018 21:13

I said to DH the other day " I love you, nearly as much as the dog " he said " bloody hell, I am in the good books " Grin


mildshock · 27/10/2018 21:13

It's a non-event really. DS (5) once told my mum "I love mummy and daddy and my baby brother. I don't love you cause you don't live with us." Grin

He also was very upset when I told my mum that I loved her. "NO MUMMY! You can only LOVE US, NOT GRANDMA TOO!" It was quite funny.


Mulberry72 · 27/10/2018 21:15

YABU to be jealous of a cat!

We have four cats and I’m waaaaaay down the pecking order!

Chill out!


LaurieFairyCake · 27/10/2018 21:22

I think you've done a fantastic job with him as he's developed enough empathy to know the cat needs him more than you do.

He sees the cat as something to be looked after - which is bloody brilliantly. You did that.


BiscuitDrama · 27/10/2018 21:31

Thank you everyone, I have thoroughly got a grip. Grin

Thank you also for the kind bits about it being good he feels he needs to look after the cat and how he should take me for granted.

And I only say the cat is pointless in relation to him! She’s not very friendly with him, I’m perfectly fond of her.

OP posts:

MrsStrowman · 27/10/2018 21:31

I tell my cat I love him the most, DH always says what about me and I say nope definitely the cat. I'm kind of joking, but I've lived with the cat longer than DH, he doesn't expect or need anything from me other than food and somewhere warm and dry to be and I don't expect or need anything from him. He's just furry and funny and cuddly and we have a simpler relationship than you can ever have with a human. I get where your son is coming from.


littlemisscomper · 27/10/2018 21:33

Children come out with all kinds of crap!! When I was little my mum was upset about something and, thinking to cheer her up, I gave her a hug and said 'Don't worry Mummy, I love you nearly as much as my animals!' Which must have made her feel heaps better...

Seriously OP, don't overthink it.


CharlieandLolaCat · 27/10/2018 21:45

My DS (4.5) loves his giraffe most of all ...

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