Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

To want to put a mall TV and console in each child's room?

78 replies

losingmymindiam · 23/10/2018 08:34

My 10 and 13 year old constantly argue about whose turn it is to use their console (each bought their own with birthday money) as they are both hooked up to one TV. We have a games room and one other TV in the lounge. I don't want a console hooked up to that. I have always been against TVs etc in bedrooms but OMG they are driving me insane. Time on devices would be regulated so they couldn't just scuttle away for hours. What are your thoughts on electronics in bedrooms?

OP posts:

bumblebee39 · 23/10/2018 12:52

I also was not a teenager that long ago and things have not changed that much

Through the wonders of modern technology I am doing a degree mostly from home whilst raising 2 kids which is amazing wonderful

I still prefer books and crafts and write out index cards 50:50 to make computerised spider diagrams because the combination means I'm learning in different ways constantly. Literally without my laptop and smart phone I would be so much worse off right now in fact my life needs those things to function.

That's why I'm so grateful to have equally lived without those thing for periods of time...

I don't think it's an either or I think it's about teaching our children responsibility and creativeness and letting them play, write, draw, dream, build etc.

Nobody I know who works in tech was allowed free reign on the PlayStation/Xbox/computer as a child.

I can't name one who even had a TV in their room!

Camsie30 · 23/10/2018 12:54

I wasn't allowed to have a TV in my room until the day of my last a level exam!!

Dontsweatthelittlestuff · 23/10/2018 12:56

Having a tv in a bedroom is not new. I am in my 50’s and had a tv in my bedroom from about 10. Ok it only had 4 channels and no internet gaming but it was still screen time. Happy to report I have never suffered any mental health problems from watching dr who in my room and I am sure my mum was glad of the peace. I don’t even watch tv now even though I have 100 plus channels to choose from.

Mamabear4180 · 23/10/2018 17:37

Television in bedrooms is linked to lower academic achievement and increased mental health problems. So no, I wouldn’t and didn’t. They can always watch on their laptops downstairs in a different room.

Agree 100% with this. My 15yo has never had a TV in her room and her mobile phone has to downstairs by 10pm.

OP I think it would be too easy to lose good intentions on times, I've never managed it without physically removing tech from my older daughter, even with rotas/chore rotas/set times etc and the best will in the world! It's just too easy for kids to switch on and too easy for us to ignore it on busy days or when we're tired. It's a slippery slope imo.

LoveManyTrustfew · 23/10/2018 20:09

My DS (now 17) used to ask when he could have a TV in his room, I used to reply, when you find a Pepperami in your lunch box.

After a while he looked at me and said it is not happening ever is it. Got it in one buddy. 🤣🤣🤣

He did however say the other day, that he spends a lot of time up in his room, which is more than fair enough at his age but he is happy that we only had one TV so we had to spend time together and we were reminiscing about TV programmes.

So long answer short - NO.

Kokeshi123 · 24/10/2018 00:47

Why on earth wouldn't the OP see their children if they were in their rooms playing a game for an hour a day? JFC.

Sure--if it does end up being just an hour. But I suspect the OP will end up spending a lot of her time chasing the kids out of their rooms and it will become a source of stress, and then eventually she will cave and they will spend more and more time in there.

Unless she puts in place some sort of technological means of ensuring that the bedroom TVs can only be used for 1 hour a day. But if you are going to do that, why not just put that technological restriction (on a rota basis) on the one TV that they already have, and make them take it in turns? Having the one TV seems to me like a good starting point for setting some rules about time usage.

As for the squabbling and whining the OP mentions? The appropriate response to this is to take the damn TV and consoles away altogether for a week or two. With an explanation that they will be coming back after both boys have had a chance to calm down and a rota and restrictions have been decided. And a warning that the consoles will be going away againfor an even longer period, next time roundif there is any more trouble. OP, you need to grow a backbone on this one.

Original poster

losingmymindiam · 24/10/2018 06:29

I'm not afraid of being strict with my children, it's more a case of the fact that the tv is on twice as long as it needs to be because they are alternating and taking turns. If they could just play at the same time it would save some grief. Also it is at changeover time that the issues occur and for the record they do lose future time for fuss made. My children are loud and vocal and like to make their feelings known. Nothing in the ten years that they have both been alive together, that I have done, has ever changed that. Like I said before, I want to make our lives more peaceful and pleasant but not at the expense of their health!

OP posts:

PatrickMerricksGoshawk · 24/10/2018 06:37

TVs in bedrooms are disastrous for sleep.

ForalltheSaints · 24/10/2018 07:07

Arguments would be ended if the OP decided who had their turn when, and if broken the consoles are locked away. Tough at first but perhaps the best solution in the end.

TVs in bedrooms not only bad for sleep, but for getting anyone up and ready in the morning.

ThePants999 · 24/10/2018 07:24

Funnily enough, I've had a TV in my bedroom my whole life and it hasn't had an impact on my ability to do a PhD. DS has had a TV in his room since he was 3 and is More Able so that's utter bollocks.

You have a PhD, and yet you think that you can extrapolate from your own experience to the general population? THAT'S bollocks, and if you really have a doctorate then you know it. A correlation between TVs in bedroom and lower academic attainment does not mean that every child with a TV in their bedroom will do badly. You cannot reject the hypothesis with a sample size of two!

ProfessorMoody · 24/10/2018 07:50

But I suspect the OP will end up spending a lot of her time chasing the kids out of their rooms and it will become a source of stress, and then eventually she will cave and they will spend more and more time in there

Wow, that's some insight! You must know the OP really well to be able to predict that. I restrict my child's TV and have never chased him out of his room, or "caved" and it's never been a source of stress. Odd.

Thenewdoctor · 24/10/2018 07:51

100% get another tele. Two consoles and only one tele makes no sense to me.

ProfessorMoody · 24/10/2018 07:53

@ThePants999

No, I don't have a PhD actually, I'm currently doing one.

Please tell me where I said that my experience means that it was the same as every member of the population ever? Oh, that's right. I didn't.

A correlation between TVs in bedroom and lower academic attainment does not mean that every child with a TV in their bedroom will do badly. You cannot reject the hypothesis with a sample size of two

Again, please tell me where I said this. Oh! Again, I didn't.

You can't say that every child with a TV in their room will do badly either.

Also, if someone provides their personal experience on an internet forum, it doesn't mean that they are using them as part of a research sample.

HTH.

SuburbanRhonda · 24/10/2018 08:06

OP it sounds like you are quite screen-focused already as a household with your gaming room, so I would go with whatever makes it easier for your family. It doesn’t matter how many people tell you their non-existent PhD is or isn’t linked to having a TV in their room.

Do it if it works for you.

BarbarianMum · 24/10/2018 08:09

Every time mine argue it all goes off for 24 hours (evil mother). Their negotiation skills are much better these days.

ProfessorMoody · 24/10/2018 08:11

Suburban, again, if you'd RTFT, you'd realise that was my point. Funny how snarky people get when a PhD is mentioned I only brought it into the equation because someone suggested that children with bedroom TVs don't attain. It was revelant in that context. Oh and it will exist in about two years, thanks

ProfessorMoody · 24/10/2018 08:13

Barbarian, I do the same with everything. Any moaning about something that has a time limitation results in a 24 hour ban of whatever it is (console, iPad etc). It worked after only a couple of moans and we've never had any since.

gamerchick · 24/10/2018 08:24

100% get another tele. Two consoles and only one tele makes no sense to me

This in a nutshell. You can have 2 screens in one room. You dont have to put them in bedrooms

leiaskye · 24/10/2018 11:05

Absolutely no issue at that age.

My children are 8 & 11, and have both had TVs for a year or so now. The games console is downstairs in the play room though.

The eldest watches telly sometimes, the youngest only when she has a sleepover.

I always had a telly in my room once I was a teenager. Did well at school and have no mental health issues. A link to MH & TVs in bedroom is something I have never heard of and wonder why it would cause them?

As long as you limit use, no issue what so ever as far as I am concerned.

leiaskye · 24/10/2018 11:12

TVs in bedrooms are disastrous for sleep

Only if you allow them to watch it then.
Mine don't. They've never even asked.

VioletCharlotte · 24/10/2018 11:17

Both my DS had TVs in their rooms from about age 9 and PlayStations from 11. They're 19 and 17 now, perfectly well adjusted, doing well at college/ uni, very sociable.

ThePants999 · 24/10/2018 19:22

@ProfessorMoody - can I invite you to just go back and read your post!?

You were replying to this:

Television in bedrooms is linked to lower academic achievement and increased mental health problems

And you said this:

Let's recap: you said that a statement about a correlation in the wider population is "utter bollocks" because it's not true of your son.

So there you go. There's where you said it. "HTH."

leo14606 · 24/10/2018 19:52

My boys 9 & 12 share a room and have a tv each one is our old living room tv and the other is from a Nana 2nd hand and both have an Xbox each which they got last Christmas. They can play when ever they want when they get in from school up till 8pm I’m not very strict with them as they are quite active and outdoorsy so I don’t worry about them being on it to much and they are up and down the stairs in and out of the house and go and play with their little sister in her room to. Some days my 9yr old will play all day because he needs to just be in his own little world which I don’t mind as I have days where I just want to live in Netflix 🙈 TVs, phones and iPads are all off at 8pm no arguments. As long as you have rules no use befor school and set an off time then it will be fine 😊

ProfessorMoody · 24/10/2018 20:22

ThePants - I'm not sure if you're aware, but I actually typed my post, so I realise what I said.

My statement that it was "utter bollocks" is referring to my own child, and pointing out that it doesn't have the same impact on everyone. I'm not sure why you can't seem to understand that. You do seem to be having some difficulty with comprehension skills - may I suggest some Oxford Reading Tree books? There are some sweet little questions at the end that you could use to practise.

ThePants999 · 25/10/2018 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.