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AIBU?

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Original poster

To really think there needs to be more help available for childcare

143 replies

pinkcreamsoda · 16/10/2018 18:30

I am looking at nurseries as I am really hoping to have a baby in the next eighteen months.

I earn 45,000 a year so I know I am luckier than most. This translates as about 2400 monthly pay.

Nursery is 1200 a month.

It’s a lot!

OP posts:
Redland12 · 16/10/2018 22:50

You are absolutely right to be looking at childcare so in advance. I am a childminder and I have a waiting list. As soon as you know you are pregnant look straight away. Also, when my children reached 2 1/2 they went into private education, full time at 3, you will probably find it cheaper than a nursery.

BackforGood · 16/10/2018 22:51

I too think there’s a lot of help.

Childcare vouchers
Tax free childcare
Funded hours at 2/3/4 years of age
Tax credits
Universal credit

Sputnik - I think you have gone back several generations.
Myself, and all my peers have all always worked (lot less maternity leave, and none of the free hours, nor employers schemes, nor tax breaks etc.) Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying these are't really positive improvements, but you need to get your "history" right.

My dc are now young adults - pretty normal for them to have gone to University and moved round. Pretty normal for my generation to have gone to University and moved round. Indeed, my parents both moved to the City they met (several hours from their homes) for work in the 1950s. My Dad's Dad travelled a lot of England and Wales looking for work in the 1920s......
My Mum worked when I was a child in the 60s and 70s.

BarbarianMum · 16/10/2018 22:52

Yeah all those greedy farmers wanting to be paid a fair price for the food they produce Tulips Hmm Clearly they should do it for free.

IvorHughJarrs · 16/10/2018 22:53

@OwlinaTree and @SputnikBear. I don't know how long you define a generation as but DH and I are approaching retirement and our children are late 20s and early 30s. We bought our first home for £39k, big difference between that and £8k! Maternity leave was 12 weeks, childcare was not cheap, workplace nurseries were a taxable benefit and we certainly could not afford to live on one salary
We just managed like all generations do

OwlinaTree · 16/10/2018 23:02

I never said it was all rosy in the past, just that there were different problem then to now. It must certainly have been much harder to be a working woman in the 70s, with less mat leave and less reliable childcare.

I don't know when they bought their first house, would have been about 1975 I should think. A quick Google shows a similar property in that area now costs £225K.

SputnikBear · 16/10/2018 23:30

I’m currently a parent with a baby. I was a child in the mid 70s and it was fairly uncommon for mums to work, at least in Yorkshire. My own parents were born in the late 30s and no mums worked. They paid £2k for their first house and lived a few doors along from their parents. It would have been unusual to even move out of the village never mind move further afield. And that’s 1-2 generations ago, not several.

GreenTulips · 16/10/2018 23:32

Mums didn't work because their husbands salary covered the mortgage and bills - now you need 2 people to run a basic house and afford a long term mortgage.

It's just wrong

Berniethefastestmilkwoman · 16/10/2018 23:46

I think it is sensible to consider whether you can afford a child before you have one. I don't get why so many pps think you should only worry about such things after you have a baby.

BackforGood · 17/10/2018 00:19

I think it is sensible to consider it to, but £45K is a good salary, by any ranking. Yes, the 2 (or just over2) years when you are paying out for FT childcare is an incredibly expensive time, but it is what it is. You save on other things - like going out anywhere yourself, and tighten your belts for those lean years. You don't expect other people to pay for your choice of lifestyle.

BackforGood · 17/10/2018 00:20

*too Blush

Dontfeellikeamillenial · 17/10/2018 00:23

Who takes the profit from the £1200 per month fees? I mean, is it state run, or private?

OliviaStabler · 17/10/2018 06:45

Because, weirdly enough, it’s in society’s interests for women to have children... shocking I know!

Really? I'd never have guessed Hmm

So, what others parts of society are you going to cut the benefits from to fund this extra childcare? There's a limited amount of money to go around ... shocking I know

Eliza9917 · 17/10/2018 06:55

Why aren't there government nurseries with capped costs?

When I see the cost of childcare - per child, per month - it does make me wonder where all the money goes.

Nodancingshoes · 17/10/2018 07:14

Countries where childcare is heavily subsidised usually have much higher income tax than us. I believe its 45% in Denmark! You don't get anything for free unfortunately... Childcare is expensive but there is more help available than ever now with tax free schemes, 30 hours funding (be aware this is only 22 hours of your nursery is open all year round) and tax credits paying up to 70% for many people.
I don't think you are silly for looking into this now - you need to know what you are going to be paying and good nurseries fill up fast

Cucciolo · 17/10/2018 07:18

If you choose to take on the costs of raising a child single-handed

It's not always a choice.

Original poster
pinkcreamsoda · 17/10/2018 07:44

It is in my case to be fair.

OP posts:
Original poster
pinkcreamsoda · 17/10/2018 07:45

Although I’d far rather raise a child with a partner. Having a child is a choice but alone is more through necessity.

OP posts:
ChipsAreLife · 17/10/2018 07:59

It is expensive, I had two close together and the nursery fees were eye watering.

There is help though. 20% tax free is brilliant and once they hit three they get 15/30 hours. It would be great to have what other countries have but there is no money for it.

Maybe start saving now so you can ease the pressure.

Good luck with the baby!

Xenia · 17/10/2018 08:14

It certainly remains very hard. I never even though was entitled to teh 6 weeks on 90% pay (you needed 2 years of service for that in those days) and then I was self employed for the last children) so took about 2 weeks off and used annual leave and worked until I was in labour. My children's father was back at work the next day. It was not easy then or now and the mortgage interest was atbout 12%. In fact the same house we bought then you can buy if you have the same jobs we had then today IF you can raise a 5% mortgage of £10k (we like my off spring and my own parents and theirs bought ap roperty before having babies and with 2 full time wages in the case of my parents who put off babies for ten years in the 1950s, me and my child).

What I would say to young women now is the same as I have always said even if it feels hard it is better for an equal marriage for power and control over your life if you both keep up a career however hard that feels as those years when the children are young are very few compared with your whole life and unless you will never earn more than the minimum waeg it tends to be safest to keep working.

Even though childcare took 50% of each of our net wages in a year or 2 of the 80s we then both got pay rises and over time that 50% became less and then children go to school too.

Dnemakr's 45% tax is not that different from sokmeone on 20% income tax 13% national insurance and 9% student loan - graudate tax though ( 42%) and I won't mention young professionals in London with babies (as people think they are "rich") who end up in the UK 40% tax bracket but obviously they are paying even more if they have the student loan than people in Denmark and yet with none of the childcare help.

ShatnersWig · 17/10/2018 08:27

Here we are again. Parents wants more free or subsidised childcare. Everyone wants more money spent on the NHS. Everyone wants more money spent on this, that and the other.

If we want all these things, then its not just closing tax loopholes and ensuring corporations pay their whack, but every single person paying about 5p more on income tax and 2p more on national insurance. Not just higher earners but everyone.

Scandinavian countries have much more free childcare but there tax system is much higher than ours. Oddly enough, in the UK, most people want all these things but most people don't want to pay for them.

Caprisunorange · 17/10/2018 09:02

Ill pay for them. Or as suggested above, Make free hours (already budgeted) for working parents only. Incentivise companies to provide on site childcare. Increase the amount of childcare vouchers available (which actually cost the government very little as the parent pays for them and you simply sacrifice that level of tax contribution)

formerbabe · 17/10/2018 09:14

Here we are again. Parents wants more free or subsidised childcare

I don't get the impression that that's what people want. I think people want wages that match the cost of living.

ShatnersWig · 17/10/2018 09:19

@formerbabe But the OP didn't say anything about wages (and she's on £45k as it is). She wants more help available for childcare and complains about the cost of a nursery. Sounds to me like someone wanting someone else to pay for it rather than asking for increased salary!

Caprisunorange · 17/10/2018 09:21

Well I do want someone else to pay for it Hmm that’s the whole point of tax isn’t it? Happy to contribute my £2 a month or whatever but yes, I want to tax payer to subsidise it. The alternative is SAHP who don’t pay any tax whose healthcare, national security, pensions etc my tax money pays for. It’s no different.

Jimdandy · 17/10/2018 09:22

Although I’m grateful for any free childcare, I’ve never understood this 30 hour thing at 3. I know the 15 hours was brought in to help the child not the parents, but the tories specifically said the increase to 30 was to encourage parents to work. I don’t know anyone who has a particular kind of job who can quit between mat leave and the term after their third birthday and walk back into their role. Or work term time only those jobs are gold dust and unheard of in the area I work in.

I’d rather have 15 hours constantly, than it jump to 30 hours after a certain age.