Or is my mother being silly?

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

At home, ill. Signed off for a fortnight.

My mother comes over twice a week and does our cleaning. We pay her for this.

Dog is currently spark out on the sofa and cats asleep on my bed. My mother keeps calling them lazy, telling them to get up and do something

Obviously they are not going to, but surely to God that is what being a cat is all about - sleeping. And dog is a PITA puppy so quite frankly sleep is much to be desired.

What does she want them to do, run the Dyson round and put a wash on

I cannot fathom paying a close relative to do my cleaning though

They are pets, what are they meant to do?

Is she being PA and talking to you through the pets

It was her idea. She wanted to pack in her job but needed some money coming in. I was about to employ a cleaner - she suggested she did it.

She also collects kids from school - again, paid to do it.

If she can train the cats to hoover I'll triple her wages...

As it seems like such an odd thing to say to some pet animals who have no concept of 'lazy', I would assume that, consciously or unconsciously, she wants you to understand she thinks you are lazy. Whether that's because you outsource your cleaning to her for money which I can imagine being complicated or because you're signed off, and she thinks you should be doing your own cleaning during this period.

But I would see it as a possibly unconscious message to you.

Now this sort of mindless chatter is what I do with my animals!

I’m with DarkDarkNight, I think she was being PA and calling you lazy. I reckon she was expecting you to muck in, or have made more of an effort to clean before she arrived.

I cannot fathom paying a close relative to do my cleaning though

Nah,....they are there to exploit.

There's nothing unconscious about her thinking I am lazy, although she is very good at PA.

Maybe the pets have inherited my bone idleness?

If she was expecting me to muck in she is dafter than I thought. The place is tidy enough but not to her standards.

Meh, we tell our cat he's lazy all the time and ask him when he's going to start pulling his weight and get a job. We also point out to him any working animals we see on TV. This is all light-hearted of course.

Is it possible she is used to chattering away to your pets whilst cleaning when you are not there?

I think you need a nanny cam to see what she makes the animals do while you're usually out of the house. Perhaps the extended naps are out of character.

Well my ddogs make fantastic Hoovers (or should that be Dysons?)
And if you dcat could flick its tail around like a duster it would be handy...
Sounds like you being in has disturbed your dm's day tbh!!

I'm grasping at straws but could she be worried that with you being ill they aren't getting the normal amount of daily exercise they normally get? And so she was telling them to get up so that they would move about and be active?

Maybe they usually chat to her when you are not there, and are now keeping quiet so as to not let the cat out of the bag. .

I talk rubbish to my cats all the time, they always meow back to me (obviously just humoring me). If my dp comes into the room they ignore me and give him the side eye, as if to say to dp, "will you listen to her wittering on", and they pretend they never answer me.

What does she want them to do, run the Dyson round and put a wash on 

🤣🤣🤣

I thought I was the only one that showed my pets working animals. Especially the cat food adverts “all that cat does is walk and eat and he bought him mummy a house. You just eat my jumpers”.

Your mother's prattling to the pets and you're taking it seriously? Why?

We keep asking our cats to put a kettle on or run the hoover round. Little bastards just lie there being all happy. Makes me sick.

I agree that it is a PA attempt of saying you shouldn't be lazing around either!

Your mother doesn't think you are ill, and you are lazing around getting on her nerves. She is using the pets as a way of conveying this message to you.

I know instantly when my kids are pulling a fast one, I guess she is onto your op! Try and look a little more sickly if you can

Meh, we tell our cat he's lazy all the time and ask him when he's going to start pulling his weight and get a job. We also point out to him any working animals we see on TV. This is all light-hearted of course.

I point out the RSPCA adverts to my cat to show her that she's not as hard done by as she seems to think.

Also wonder if your mother is secretly resentful having to clean for you twice a week. It is slightly demeaning.

Try RTFT snowymountainsalways

I talk to the pets all the time. It's the idea of laziness that tickled me.

I will be drawing them up a chore list as of tomorrow. They can start earning their keep.