To think I've outgrown my friends? And maybe should not continue?

[penny234]

I'm 33 and i have 2 friends one I've known 15 years and the other 5 years and the 3 of us are friends.
Both of these use cocaine on a night out.
I have never and would never touch any drugs (not trying to be mrs perfect but never seen the point) they've both said I'm the only friend who doesn't take it and actually tried to make it seem like I'm the one who isn't "normal"
She's just sent me a Snapchat at a kids show saying "think this guy is on the sniff"
This made me think ..god your pathetic.
The girl I've known 5 years,will drink herself to oblivion and falls over constantly on nights out,becomes aggressive and told me she urinated on someone's door stop after night out and was laughing about it.

I just don't find it funny,it's pathetic and I just don't feel like we have anything in common.
I'm meant to be on a night out on Saturday with them ...I really want to cancel and stay in and watch strictly.
I know I probably sound boring etc but I've found myself ignoring phone calls lately from them both.

I'm with you OP, they would not be the kind of people I would want to hang out with TBH, I would much rather a pizza and movie night! But I'm 33 and clearly an old lady and boring too!

I'm probably old before my time but now the nights are getting darker I love lighting my candles n takeaway.
God knows what il be like in 20 years time

Neither alcohol or cocaine is clever. One just happens to be illegal.

I think you're just growing up and realising that as much fun can be had from activities that don't involve drugs or excessive alchohol!

I think sending a message along the lines of what the @thecakediet said would be a great starting point.

Cancel, I wouldn't imagine you would enjoy being out with them when they are off their faces.

Strictly, candles, wine and a takeaway sounds like a normal Saturday night to me.

OP I've done all this wild child behaviour in the past & let me tell you you aren't missing anything & the day after these 'benders' are like near death experiences.

Taking drugs isn't cool & it isn't clever, and neither is pissing on someone's doorstep!

Coming from a previous party animal here sadly they should have should outgrown these antics by now 🙄 It is the behaviour of young un's rebelling ..... not women of this age.

Leave them to it & lets hope the supposed 'coke' they are shoving up their noses is just that as nowadays it's cut with rat poison & all sorts ( drugs have never been safe but back in the day they were more pure if you get my drift )

Also police are more onto this now with sniffer dogs etc & again back in the day there was much less chance of getting caught.

Absolute losers , bin them off 👎🏻

You don't sound like you have much in common with them. You certainly don't sound as if you like them. You are allowed to not like and not be friends with people- it's totally OK to decide you don't want to have anything to do with them.

I've found that cocaine users and non cocaine users can't really socialise together. My large group of friends became two smaller groups for this reason.

I'm the same age as you OP and am so, so over crazy nights out. I've been over them for about 5 years now. Surely they should have gotten all this out of their systems in their early 20s?

I gave up recreational drugs a while ago, and dropped all my drug using friends when I did. One, so I wouldn't be tempted but two, because that was what we had in common and what bonded us. Its no fun being on a different wavelength to your buds on a night out. Find some new friends.

I don't see how anyone who drinks alcohol can pass judgement on a drug taker really!
Sounds like you have nothing in common with these friends anymore, theres nothing wrong with that. Different people like different things, do what makes you happy. Lifes short.

You've grown out of them.
Where's the fun in holding up two " buzzin" 30 year old coke heads in piss soaked pants on a Saturday night?

I have an old school friend who I lost touch with for a few years, we are back in touch casually (odd group night out) she had a drug problem in the years we were out of touch. Sniffs, clenches her jaw and grinds it a lot it’s so sad to see. This is the other side of it which people don’t think of, starts as a laugh and then Snowballs into life being taken over. She’s clean as far as I know but the damage is done. I saw so many people in my clubbing days looking like absolute twats off their faces on drugs, i decided that it was not for me and I’m glad I did

Alcohol and illegal drugs aren't really the same tho age they ...
Anyway don't want to turn it into that kinda discussion as it's been done to death and don't want any arguments etc
We all have different opinions and that makes the world go round.

*are

I'm around the same age as you, i have a couple of friends that I've drifted apart from also due to cocaine use. I don't judge, however it's not something I'd ever do and had a few nights out last year where they constantly disappeared and to be honest did my head in until I went home on my own. One of these also goes out drinking every weekend often Friday and Saturday. She has children but is separated and their Dad has them every weekend. I still see her just not for nights out, I try and arrange things with the children instead and go for lunch. Admittedly sometimes at lunch I struggle with finding common ground anymore as we're in such different places in our life.

As for being boring, if you want to get cosy, eat chocolate and watch strictly do that! I know personally that's my Saturday night nowadays, and nights out are the odd occasion and I make an effort (blow dry, new outfit etc) and have a great time but I certainly have no desire to do this weekly.

Sounds like you can't handle the sesh op

Cocaine was once legal and alcohol illegal. I wouldn't judge either way particularly.

I would hardly compare a few cocktails to cocaine.

The main difference between alcohol and drugs are that with alcohol 99% of the time your getting exactly what you asked for and you can be confident of that- with drugs you never know for sure what you’ve got.

I don't see how anyone who drinks alcohol can pass judgement on a drug taker really!

BECAUSE DRUG TAKING IS ILLEGAL AND EVEN IF YOU THINK IT SHOULDN'T BE (OR THAT ALCOHOL SHOULD BE) THE REALITY IS THAT USE OF ILLEGAL DRUGS WILL BE FUNDING ALL KINDS OF HORRENDOUS THINGS YOU PROBABLY WOULDN'T LIKE. ITS LIKELY THAT SOMEONE HAS SUFFERED OR DIED IN ORDER FOR YOU TO GET HOLD OF THOSE DRUGS.

ALSO BECAUSE ON OCCASION DRUGS ARE BADLY OR DANGEROUSLY MIXED AND CAN KILL. IF YOU BUY ALCHOL FROM A LICENSED PREMISES YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE BUYING.

sorry for shouting, these threads always descentd into an argument about drug use.

OP do what you want on a saturday night, if you want to remain friends with these people meet them on your own terms, for meals or coffee or whatever, you are not old before your time you are normal, they are immature and stupid. I behaved like that ( minus the illegal drugs) when I was a teenager, they are in their thirties, it's pathetic. ( urinating on someone's doorstep - wtf?)

I hope you have other friends who you have things in common with

Why do they get a loose jaw?

All excellent arguments for legalisation and regulation, garethsouthgatesmrs

I probably could be seen as dull (and I'm a fair bit older than you) but a night out with those 2 sounds bloody awful. Who wants to sit through other people getting high and then aggressive.
Ditch them OP. Can you find some other friends who would enjoy going for a coffee and a chat or shopping and a nice meal? Much more enjoyable stuff to do.