To quit my job with nothing to go to?

[iamloading]

Sorry will try to keep this as short as possible whilst giving context.

All my life I've done the sensible thing. I'm a pretty boring person really! Worked since I was 16, straight to uni, straight into a graduate job, series of good jobs since then that are ok (can't say I actively enjoy them!) I've been very fortunate to have had a very well paid career to date, with a few nice redundancy pay offs, and now earn 6 figures and have two modest houses paid off. However the flip side of that is a very long commute, very long hours and high stress levels.

Ironically despite everyone seeing me as a career person, all I've ever wanted from age 5 was to be a mum. I've now got a gorgeous 3 month old child and work expect me back in 3 months time. There is a potential option of working 4 days a week.

The AIBU is I just don't want to work for a while. I want two years off with my baby. She will be an only child and I will only get this precious time once.

If I quit I will never get another job that pays half as much as I live in the arse end of nowhere. It's pretty much career suicide. Long story but returning to this job later is also not an option. My husband has a low paying job three days a week, due to health issues he cannot work more.

So sensibly he should of course become a SAHD whilst I work. But for once in my life I don't want to be sensible. We have an incredibly modest lifestyle (helped of course by no mortgage!) so pretty much my whole salary goes into savings. We could manage on just his salary.

Am I being stupid? My mum isn't around, and I suppose I just want someone to say "fuck it, you only live once so do what you need to do to be happy!"

Go for it - you've earned this. Maybe use one of the houses to create extra income?

Fuck it, you only live once so do what you need to do to be happy.

Ask and ye shall receive!

You can afford to take a break much more than most so what's stopping you? When she's older you can work your way back or not if you don't have any pressure. It may be an opportunity for you to do something totally different that you love. Changes are scary but can be really positive and throw things into perspective.

In a very similar boat to you and I resigned yesterday (out of the blue as far as colleagues were concerned). Do it.

Do it you and your child deserves it.I wish I had.

Quit and enjoy the time home with your baby. Rent one of the houses out to help financially. I loved being at home with dc when they were young and they're only little for a while

Fuck it ,you only live once Do what your heart tells you
Enjoy your time off and the future will take care of itself x

If you can afford it then absolutely yes! You never know, you might find a lower paid job but closer job just as fulfilling. With your experience and obvious drive when the time comes to get back into career mode (if you want to) then I am sure you can apply your skills to one outside of your current one.

It wouldn’t actually be sensible for DH to be a SAHD unless in the event of a break up you’d be Ok with him having more custody of the DC and possibly also paying spousal maintenance. (I wouldn’t). Being a SAHP to a toddler can also be physically and mentally demanding, which may not be best for his health.

The most sensible option seems to be for both of you to work part time.

Why do work “expect you back”? maternity leave is a year and it sounds as though you can afford to take the full year.

Well paid jobs part time (4 days) can be hard to find after a career break.

Thank you for taking the time to reply (with what I wanted to hear 😂) I do rent out one of the houses but I currently see very little income from it due to the tax bracket I'm in, however that would change if I quit so would bring in an extra £13k which I had forgotten about!!

Moving closer to work would also be sensible. Living far away from good jobs makes things difficult.

You sound very wealthy, but probably still not wealthy enough not to have to consider your medium and long term financial earnings prospects, eg pension . There may be options you haven’t thought of, eg moving within your field to a lower hours/stress role but still with decent pay.

You sound like you’ve done incredibly well out of life and your sensible decisions have set you up for a wonderful future. You should be very proud! Your break is well deserved

Are you in the UK? You are entitled to a full year off. Take advantage of that but I have to be honest I would go back for 4 days a week in your shoes. You may find yourself in a baby bubble now but desperate to be back when she’s a little bit older. Don’t close all the doors yet but please ensure you take the full year and take the time to really consider your options x

Sorry @Loopytiles - cross post. I agree that it will be hard to find another part time job. The challenge is for those four days it would mean leaving home at 6.30 and getting in at 7.30 ish. Such long days. Regarding taking the full year mat leave, all legality aside my life there would be hell if I did that. It's a very male dominated industry and I (totally unfairly) would lose all respect from them. Unfair and illegal I know, but that's the situation.

Enjoy every minute with your child if you have that option. I know it is a cliché but they really are little for such a short time. I can only see you regretting it if you don't take this opportunity.

Do it. Like you say, you won't get this time back with your little one.

Fuck it, you only live once so do what you need to do to be happy!

If you can afford it, and think you will be able to manage long term on a lower income, then do it. You only live once!

I would start by taking the full year of maternity leave and see how you go. So what if they “lose respect for you”? Sounds like their respect is worth nothing and you’re contemplating resigning anyway. You don’t owe them anything. (I work in a male dominated environment too - at the senior end anyway - so know what it’s like).

If after the year off you still want to resign then do it.

Awww

Do It Op as it sounds like you can afford too with savings .

If you’re thinking of quitting anyway, then discrimination by colleagues seems less of a concern - notify work that you will be taking the full year, which will give you more time to reflect.

If you do decide to return length of commute is indeed an issue. But that may be an issue in the future too.

If you have pretty much made up your mind not to go back why not avail of the year maternity leave to allow you further thinking time and will mean the length of time your not employed on paper is less.

completely agree in taking the year, dont cut your nose off to spite your face- who cares what your co workers think if you were going to quit anyway. Demand your year and dont be pushed into making this decision yet.

What’s the point in working so hard and earning so much if you never get to enjoy it?
You have one life and you are right, you won’t get this time back. Enjoy your baby.

Is there any element of the skillset and experience you've accumulated in your job that is non-geographic and could be used from home? - I know several people who have quit from highly paid and highly qualified professions to act as life/career coaches/mentors to those still working in that profession. It's quite popular in the legal professions, for example. And 90% of their "contact" time with clients is Skype/Facetime.

Could you consult later?