To really need some support for Monday

[cricketmum84]

I know that in the grand scheme of things people are out there going through so so much shitter times than me!

I've had anxiety, panic attacks and depression for about 18 months. I'm at my worst when I'm at work as I'm just in a constant state of heightened anxiety.

I've basically copped out of going in for the last week blaming childcare issues. I'm pretty sure that if I don't go in tomorrow i will lose my job. I know that I have to go and that I mustn't keep copping out but my anxiety is literally through the roof, panicky feelings, on the loo every few mins.

I just really really need some advice and support to get me through this week.

I've been applying for jobs in a totally different field so I'm hoping to god I get something and it makes a difference to my life.

Can you see if you can manage the catastrophising? I know that it is tricky, but try to stop thinking through all the scenarios of how it will go horribly wrong. Try and think of one thing you CAN do towards your goal of going to work tomorrow. Can you pick out an outfit, can you make a packed lunch, can you put everything you need by the front door. Just take one small step towards your goal and then see how you feel.

@cricketmum4 - have you seen your GP? You can discuss a fitness to work certificate - you sound as if you might benefit from some time off work, and/or medication/talking therapy e.g. CBT. If you are already taking medication, doses can be adjusted or medication changed to find something that suits you better. This link may be useful www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/mental-health-helplines/

Thanks. Yes seen GP recently and had dosage increased although it can take a couple of weeks to settle and have some effect.
I can't afford to take any more time off work 😢

Just remember that getting to work will be a big step but once you’re there, it won’t seem so bad. Do you like your job?

Sounds mental but tighten your bra straps it works as a distraction (slight physical discomfort not till it hurts?) My anxious friend does it all the time it works for her

Can you get yourself some cbt ?
It’s very good at changing thought patterns and instilling realistic thinking.
My dd has just had 10 weeks of it with camhs.
1 hour a week. It’s makes sense when it’s explained to you.
Hang on in there op. It’s tough but there is a way to help.

No I'm not enjoying it to be honest. I've only been there a month too!
I've basically gone from managing a full end to end process to only specialising in one part of the process but on a much bigger scale. It's quite boring, I'm not able to use any of my best skills and so far still just watching someone else doing their work.

I've got 40 mins of peace before I need to set off so gonna use that time to have another look through job boards.

Can you incentivise yourself?
Plan a family treat for Christmas that you can only afford if working?
*disclaimer- good mental health is far more important than any objects/ things, but if you are trying to get yourself through, it might help to picture the excitement of Santa express or whatever- think about that and interrupt the negative cycle?

Good luck.

I have no useful advice, though. If I had any I’d be using it myself. As it is I’m sitting on the stairs trying to calm my breathing before heading into work myself. Today’s the day I’ve got to face my boss to tell her that unless I move roles I will suffer a severe breakdown.

So I offer a handhold. We will make it through today and tomorrow will be better.

@JammieCodger hand holding right back at you. I've just had to delay my start time by half an hour and offer to work through lunch because (TMI) my stomach is like a bloody washing machine and I can't leave the loo! Trying to breathe deeply and calm myself before I ring a taxi.
We can do this! I'll be checking my phone throughout the day so feel free to PM me if you need a chat x

@Cantchooseaname we fly to Spain in 3 weeks. So I just need to get through these next few weeks and then I have 2 whole weeks of stress free beach and sun time. That's keeping me going at the moment (as long as I don't think about the flying too much lol)

Some of the stuff I've been taught in CBT which do help:

• Mindfulness/body scanning - something as simple as naming sounds you can hear, things you can feel, what can you smell etc
• Worry trees - list what you are worrying about, what it REALLY means (i.e. I am worried about a presentation, but really I am worried about fear of failure or embarrassment in front of others), and then can I do anything about it, yes or no?
• Identifying where you are catastophizing, where you are making assumptions about things you can't control, and challenging these thoughts.
• Breathe this way - cover one nostril to breathe in, cover the other to breathe out.
• Go through the anxiety - sit with the feeling, don't try to make them go away, just allow yourself to feel awful and believe that that too is ok, you can manage, give yourself a set time to worry and try to raise your stress levels and then feel them come back down again.

@cricketmum84 - I used the service below - a managing anxiety 6 week group course, 90 minutes once a week - a few years ago when I developed A&D for the first time. It helped me to understand what was happening & how to reframe my thoughts & emotions so that I was in charge instead of my anxiety. This support may not be available where you live but the link includes a link to an online course & NHS recommended mental health phone apps www.steps2wellbeing.co.uk/updates_and_info/online_courses/. Take care

Hand hold to you both.
If your job is making you unhappy and anxious please put your health first and foremost. I failed to do this and ended up with burnout which is taking one hell of a long time to recover from.

2 hours to go. Still surviving! (Just)

Still surviving! (Just) but you’re doing it, it’s bloody hard but you’re still doing it, go you star

@JammieCodger how did your day go? I held it together until the last hour but then literally felt like a caged animal, hot and flushed so my glasses kept steaming up, could feel my breathing getting faster, legs shaking, going dizzy.

But I got through it and apart from being late this morning worked my full shift. Although am now worrying about telling my manager I have a hospital appt Friday afternoon. She already thinks I'm taking the piss.

A hospital appointment is in no way taking the piss. If your boss thinks it is then the problem is with her.

I've already cancelled it once because I was too anxious to tell her I needed the morning off!
It's my first appt for physio on my back for 2 bulging discs that are causing me a lot of pain. If I cancel it again then I'll lose my referral.

Many organisations will allow time off for hospital appointments without using annual leave or needing to make up the time - take a look at the policy for your employer.

Should probably change the thread name to Tuesday now!

So my stomach is so anxious this morning that I've thrown up. All over the kitchen floor Cos I couldn't make it to the loo in time. Now I'm going to be late again Cos I need to bleach and mop and get showered and changed and redo my makeup.

Oh OP, this sounds awful for you. Have you told your employer about your anxiety? Do you think they will be understanding?

I mentioned it to my manager but we haven't had a proper discussion about it. I've not been there very long and didnt want to go in with a list of shit that's wrong with me :(

The stupid thing is it's just a day at work. That's all it is! Why can't my stupid brain just see it that way and get it over with!

I just resigned... effective immediately.

Do you feel the weight lift off your shoulders? I bet you do and you feel as if you can breathe. Enjoy her holiday and worry about job hunting when you get back. But please look into CBT - worked a treat with me and my D and A