Aibu to not control my facial expressions?

[FaithHopeAndSkulduggery]

I am very controlled in what I say and am polite to a fault.

However

I think the repression has spilled over into having an over expressive face. Someone said to me ‘smile, it might never happen’ and I rolled my eyes. I hadn’t even realised I had done it until someone pointed it out.

I can’t help it. If I am surprised I have a cartoon surprised face. If someone says something I think is stupid I get a ‘wtf’ face. If I’m happy I beam, if something is funny it’s all over my face.

I'm the same, my mouth can be saying one thing but my initial expression before I can stop it says something completely different, before I get chance to change it.
Causes problems sometimes tbh. I just try and bluff my way through it by being extra nice (happens at work a lot) and trying to be more amenable so that maybe the person thinks they imagined it!
Does tend to happen a lot when I'm dealing with idiots though so maybe not all bad.

Me too.

Can't be helped.

I'm in your boat! My face gives me away constantly even if I'm desperately trying to keep my "swan" face showing. I like to tell myself it's because I'm a nice, open person!

Don't apologise for yourself. Nothing you describe is problematic.

Someone who said "smile, it may never happen" deserves a lot more than an eye roll!

That's the way it's meant to be, don't change!

Are you my daughter?

She is really hilarious, though, to be fair, not from her point of view!

Whatever she is thinking is written all over her face. One day it'll get her into trouble!

YANBU. My face says it all, no matter how much I try to hide it.

Also rolling your eyes is the least they should expect after such a patronising statement. I detest it. It's almost exclusively said to women by men and it's such a stupid thing to say because the person in question might have good cause to look so down.

I snapped at a guy on the bus who said that to me once. I said If I look like this it probably has happened, and it had. My Grandmother had died just a few days before.

Me too. I in no way have a poker face.

I'm the same. I did a broadcasting training course a few years ago so we could take what we'd learned back and run our own training courses, and the tutor told me after I'd done my 'to camera' interviews: 'You come across well but you have a very expressive face. It's very clear when I ask something you think is a stupid question.'

When I watched the DVD back at home, he was right. It was a bit mortifying. But I don't really know how to stop it so I'll just merrily go through life offending people!

I have the exact same problem, years ago in my job I wanted to progress from team member to management. My then manager said before that happens you need to learn to control your face.
Current day, totally different job one of my colleagues finds my facial expressions hilarious
I did become a manager, but obviously didn't learn to control my face in the process

I don't need to use words. My face says what I'm thinking.

I don't think it's a bad thing. Especially not in my role.

Im exactly the same as well. I’ve got sore ankles from where my bosses and colleagues have kicked me over the years because of the expression on my face.

I’ve tried doing neutral face then got feedback I was looking menacingly at people and scaring them

I don't have a poker face. It's best to just roll with it. I quickly learned early in my teaching career that I'm useless at dead pan and to perform with what I've got.

DS2 is my mini-me. Every thought he's ever had has passed through his face 😂

Hah! One of my colleagues always makes sure she can see my face at meetings because my expressions are apparently priceless. I suspect it's mainly this one ->

I have the same problem! Sorry OP, no advice, but at least you know it’s not just you!

@Pickledchutney - I’ve found my people.

I used to get into trouble with teachers at school because I would show exasperation or contempt with my face if they told me off. I wasn't really aware I was doing it. I was the same at work in meetings or if the boss said something I thought was ridiculous. Trying to control it was a nightmare.
My mother used to say it would land me in big trouble one day

And, my partner reckons I look at people like I'm going to kill them when we are out anywhere. If anyone has a cure I would like to know.

I have found the only way to improve this is to cultivate a genuine interest in others' points of view and a humility about what they are trying to achieve. Nobody asks a question THEY think is stupid. Or asks you to do something THEY think is pointless.

When my face shows instant judgement I know it's because I am not holding enough space for the other person.

I do this! I don't even know how to stop it... awful though I always feel bad when it gets pointed out :(

Nobody asks a question THEY think is stupid. Or asks you to do something THEY think is pointless.When my face shows instant judgement I know it's because I am not holding enough space for the other person

You are probably right, it's a judgemental issue. The problem is when you are faced with a person who has proved their stupidity on numerous occasions
But seriously, I think you have a point which I will take on board.

Oh yes this is me! I just can't help it

spiderdemon

I see your point, but some people do speak without first engaging their brains (we’ve all done it). Why should I be all interested in inhaling that brain fart ?

@Gottagetmoving

I think I’ve also got a bitchy resting face too.

I can’t sneeze quietly either. I just don’t know how .

Ha ha this is me too....my face says everything and I don’t even realise! I’m an honest person but sometimes that isn’t helpful so I shut my month but my face gives me away apparently!