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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bus driver taking off, baby in a sling

63 replies

IABURQO · 26/09/2018 19:10

Many times now when I have the baby in a sling, the bus driver has driven off before I have any chance of sitting down. Usually there are free seats, so I'm not taking time even by waiting for someone to get up. One yesterday started driving away as I touched the card on the reader, not for the first time. It isn't the same driver, nor even the same bus; quite a few will wait but an equal number don't. AIBU when I shout to ask them to wait as I have a baby in a sling? Should I assume they'll take off and ask them to wait for me to sit before I touch the card? It feels so dangerous for the baby when the bus is rocking around and other passengers wobbling about; is it just me that worries because I have tendonitis and I can't rely as much on holding on, so I should be explaining that to the driver instead of assuming they'll realise a baby is vulnerable? What do other people do?

OP posts:
redsummershoes · 26/09/2018 19:12

yanbu
report the driver. I assume london? then a text number and bus number is at the side close to the driver cabin.

Creeper8 · 26/09/2018 19:12

They always do this. With a pram its annoying as no hands to hold on. but yep its the norm. they should wait really.

StoneofDestiny · 26/09/2018 19:14

I'm fearful every time I see someone with a baby in a sling, the risk to the baby if the parent trips is immense - so I can imagine the worry about navigating a moving, shuddering bus!

Original poster
IABURQO · 26/09/2018 19:17

@redsummershoes - would the bus companies care? I'm assuming their training doesn't currently say "make sure babies are seated/parked safely before taking off", so maybe the companies would rather they keep to the schedule.*

  • until someone's baby one day gets badly hurt and they get sued, then everybody's training might be updated
OP posts:
Creeper8 · 26/09/2018 19:17

You could use one hand though surely? sling still allows one hand free? I use to stand up all the time with my baby in the sling as bus was always packed.

NotUmbongoUnchained · 26/09/2018 19:20

They’re fuckers. I had to get a bus when once when I was pregnant and he didn’t wait for me sit down before he sped off and I fell backwards down the steps I was going up. And nobody helped me up!

Moody123 · 26/09/2018 19:22

The drivers always set off before you get into your seat, I've had my baby in the sling many times... YANBU but I wouldn't say anything, it's just the way it is

PorkFlute · 26/09/2018 19:23

Report it. I used to have the same issue getting on and off with my toddler and on one occasion saw an elderly lady go absolutely flying. There’s signs on our buses saying you must ring the bell and remain seated until the bus has stopped but If you do that they just tend to carry on past the stop. Very annoying.

LostInShoebiz · 26/09/2018 19:23

Happened to me loads when I was on crutches with my leg in a frame. Bus companies just don’t care. They’ve got schedules to stick to so they don’t give a toss.

Cyw2018 · 26/09/2018 19:27

YANBU
In order to pass your D1 (minibus) or D (bus) driving license, you have to pull up to and pull away from a bus stop safely, this includes checking that all passengers are safe and seated before pulling away.

Cornettoninja · 26/09/2018 19:28

I don’t think yabu at all but honestly I never took dd on the bus in sling. It just seemed dangerous in the event of a crash to not even have the pram as protection.

Where I used to live the buses are as you describe and everybody walked up and down the aisle while it was moving and the drivers expected you at the door ready to get off when they stopped. Where I am now are almost religious about everyone being in their seat when they’re moving.

Original poster
IABURQO · 26/09/2018 19:28

@Creeper8 - that may have felt safe to you, but my tendonitis makes it hard to rely on either hand for stability if the bus jerks. Maybe I'm just more (unnecessarily?) anxious / nervous about other people bashing into the baby too, I couldn't say if I'm being irrational there or not. I definitely always ask for a seat if there isn't a free one and I can only think of people being happy to get up, whereas when I was pregnant it was a lot harder to get a seat. Which suggests to me that subconsciously almost everyone but bus drivers sees the baby as being a bit vulnerable.

OP posts:
pinkmagic1 · 26/09/2018 19:29

Our local buses all do this. Pregnant women, small children, old folks, disabled people, they don't care. I am sure they have a score sheet in their staffroom for the number of people they can make fall down in a day.

Original poster
IABURQO · 26/09/2018 19:30

@NotUmbongoUnchained - that sounds horrible, I'm presuming you were ok or would have said so, but that's awful.

OP posts:
NotUmbongoUnchained · 26/09/2018 19:33

Baby was ok. I just sat there and cried!

Creeper8 · 26/09/2018 19:33

Yh i wouldnt dream of asking for a seat. I didnt feel comfortable but i just stopped taking the sling tbh (not saying that you should.)

SnowOnTheSeine · 26/09/2018 19:38

It's normal here too although we did once have a driver who refused to move until someone gave DH (who had the sling) a seat.

JLG19 · 26/09/2018 19:38

Yep, our bus drivers are arseholes too.

53rdWay · 26/09/2018 19:38

YANBU and they should take more care anyway. An elderly lady local to me was very badly injured from a fall when the driver did this.

speakout · 26/09/2018 19:47

What about passengers who are standing because the bus is full?

Most of my local buses are packed with passengers standing at rush hour- what should the driver do then?
Refuse to move because not everyone is seated?

pinkmagic1 · 26/09/2018 19:50

Of course not Speakout, but they should make sure any vulnerable people are seated before pulling away.

LittleBookofCalm · 26/09/2018 19:51

do you have to use the sling op, can't you use a pram? you would feel safer then.

nocutsnobuttsnococonuts · 26/09/2018 19:52

Yanbu bus drivers can be wankers. When I had dd1 in a sling the bus driver started shouting at me saying I was endangering my baby and if the bus stopped suddenly I would fall over and crush my baby and she would die. Went into detail, It was awful he ranted for ages, unfortunately I had to get that bus so I got on and sobbed the whole way. Not one person asked if I was ok. My mum then met me and she rang the bus company and really had a go at them. I hope he got given a warning or something, if slings were deemed unsafe they wouldn't allow them on the bus.

On another note I dont think buggies are safer, I was on a bus that went fast round a roundabout, the buggy swerved and baby fell out. Was the baby ones where they aren't strapped in. Also many don't put the brakes on and I have had someone nearly fall onto by buggy before as that's where people all stand.

redsummershoes · 26/09/2018 19:52

or that anyone is in a position where they can hold on and stand safely.

LittleBearPad · 26/09/2018 19:53

It never really bothered me but I was used to standing on a moving tube train.