to ask WHAT THE JEFF HAVE I DONE TO MY TABLE??

[TwllBach]

WHAT THE FUCK

DP spent ages painting and varnishing this table last winter. I left a wet towel on it rolled up with a blanket I’d knitted inside it to try and block it, then took the towel off and it wasn’t like this I swear...

Then I laid the (cream) blanket on the table while it probably was a bit damp still and put ge place mats around the edges to try and stop it rolling. Left it for 24 hours.

What has happened????

More importantly HOW CAN I FIX IT??? Preferably in the next hour...

It's a water mark isn't it? There are home remedies like mayonnaise (promise I'm not joking!) but in my experience only sanding and vanishing properly works.

Does it look like it’s getting better??

Ouch. I feel a frosty evening in Bach Towers coming on.

It looks like you’ve stripped the varnish off do you have any left over from when it was done?

Oh my gooooood

None of it has transferred to the blanket though so surely it can’t have stripped it?

Maybe it’s just wet. I’m going to try the hair dryer...

OK! Be brave...

Grab a think, clean towel. Put your iron on With your iron on a dry low-to-medium setting, NO STEAM NONE AT ALL!!!!!

Iron the towel carefully for a few seconds at a time, check under to see if the wood under has now dried out - you are aiming to release the moisture and soak it up with the towel.

Repast until the stain has disappeared, then polish and smile

Not: this only works with new water marks.

Put a thick towel over it and a warm iron on top. It draws the water up from under the varnish. Go carefully though, obviously. Don't want to burn it

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not the hairdryer!

That could be too hot and might make it too dry, then it will buckle and look worse!

I DONT HAVE AN IRON

Snap Wisest

Oh! Bugger!

Ask next door!

ok this is going to sound weird but smear it with mayonnaise and rub off , if no improvement than you will have to be a bit more aggressive with a little toothpaste and baking soda mixed into a paste, then when that's off try mayo again...your trying to get oils back into wood that's become water damaged, when stain fades you want to wax the wood or oil it
in time it will also fade if you can put near sunlight this will help too, but I understand you don't have time

Tell me it’s getting better

I’m going next door...

Mayonnaise takes about 12 hours, OP asked for a quick remedy!

And yes! It is looking better

I did this at a holiday rental once shat myself.

The iron idea sounds good, although mine just sorted itself out.

I think it’s getting better though? It’s approaching a stage where you can deny all knowledge / blame kids.

Sorry - that sounded snippy. But I now how OP feels, that's why I know that mayo takes too bloody long

I have the iron. You can’t see it at all from one angle now, so I’m hoping a quick go with the iron will do the final trick

Yes, looking better. Do tell him, though.

Only AFTER you've made it look good. Tinkly laugh, head tilt and tears - should be fine

I've used a mixture of olive oil and white vinegar to get a water mark off wood.

Deny all knowledge and cover it strategically.
I polished out a watermark, but I hate to tell you it was many months before it disappeared.
Is it totally dry? It takes some time to dry completely.

That might be the next step, aiming at any darker marks. But hopefully, as it is new, it will just disappear with a little bit of heat!

Oh I’ll tell him —only if I fix it— I’m not scared of him or anything, I just don’t want to be the one that fucked his table! Not after he lovingly cemented in a slate hearth he’d repurposed from a scrap yard and I chopped wood in it and knocked whole chunks out with the axe

It can’t be me that messes with yet another household feature