Old lady shouted at my child

[Whereisthecoffee]

I was bringing my child back from preschool he was having a strop as his friend wasn’t there so he was upset he hadn’t played with other children. I was dealing with him and finding out what the issue was. An old lady started shouting be good for your mummy! I know she was trying to be helpful but AIBU for being a bit pissed off that she shouted at my child when I was dealing with him ? I’m a firm believer in it takes a village but she didn’t need to interfere when I was there.

I’m sorry if that’s perceived as ageist. Was not my intent.

‘Old lady’. On MN it probably means she was 41. 🙄

I'd just come out of the hospital after a sore operation and called into Aldi with my Dfather.
We'd done shopping and were queuing with a mother and a toddler behind, toddler being loudly outraged and furious about his new car being on the belt... Mum said in a really clear, plummy voice
Stop it Now or I will let that Old man take you!

My poor Da's face

Is it Wizard? Why is it ageist to say generations do things differently?

Surely it is only ageist if you are being rude or insulting about the person or persons, saying something is different is hardly that.

I thought sh had delivered a mouthful of abuse when I saw your thread title!

You are being oversensitive. She probably wanted a small opportunity to have a minor human interaction. She was being pleasant.

Cut her some slack.

When I had small DC this sort of thing happened almost daily. It's part of living in a community with lots of different people of all ages and cultures. Its just part of daily life.

Not everyone behaves exactly as you would wish, and I am sure that you occasionally annoy other people. It really is puzzling me that you would start a thread on it, and even more so that you would actually be pissed off.

I didn’t show her that it annoyed me , I asked because I wasn’t sure if I was just being sensitive now I know and will try to chill a bit.

I think she was helping you. I had the same. When collecting mine from nursery she threw a massive tantrum on our walk home. She refused to walk anymore and screamed. An old man shouted at her, "shut up, be good for your mummy" winked at me then left. At first I thought how dare he, but realised it made my child stop. He was doing it to help me, and it worked!

Genderwitched people start threads about all kinds of stuff. Like you say not everyone behaves exactly the way you do, so I'm not sure why you'd be puzzled!

Get yourself some coffee Op and let it go

MargoLovebutter I'm puzzled because an incident like this is such an everyday sort of thing that if you let it annoy you, you would be annoyed rather a lot. Like if the supermarket had run out of bin bags or something, I don't know.

And when I clicked on the thread I was expecting something a bit more exciting.

No that’s not it. As we age our bodies age physically, mentally and emotionally. We lose friends and relatives. Our general anxiety levels increase and some us suffer dementia and Alzheimer’s which makes us say funny things.

How olds old. At around seventeen we are at our peak. From then on we hit the long decline. John lennon reckoned thirty five was an age beyond which you could tryst no one.

35 is my definition of old.

@whereisthecoffee

The lady meant well (probably) but YANBU that it was naff-all to do with her, and she had no place saying anything.

As for saying old lady, big deal! Some people on MN just LOVE to make a massive hoo-har when you have the TEMERITY to call someone 'old.'

'Oh, this old lady knocked me over yesterday, deliberately, then spat on me, whacked me with a rock, then called me a cunt. I spent 3 hours in ER and my cheekbone is throbbing where she hit me with the rock.'

MN response; did you seriously just call this lady OLD, wtf has her AGE got to do with anything? Shame on you. You disgust me...

No I get you, she probably was just being nice but I would've found it so patronising.

Sounds to me like she was trying to be supportive of you. If she'd kept quiet you might have thought she was silently disapproving! How old is old by the way?

I absolutely love the word bold used in the Irish sense. It's perfect in a way that we have no exact alternative.
< misses point>

I'm afraid this is everyday ageism. you mention Possible cultural differences, would you have mentioned an ethnic background in the same way? "Old lady" it makes my blood boil.

I wonder what she thought she was going to achieve tbh. Shouting at an already upset child is hardly going to have them stop crying and starting to behave angelically is it! She was seeing a snapshot and had no idea why he was upset. Yanbu.

For goodness sake she didn't shout AT your child.

She was helping you out. I would have taken the opportunity to teach my boy.

35 is my definition of old There is no reasoning with stupid. 🙄

35 is my definition of old

Good grief How old are you then? 4?

I think the age of the lady does have some bearing in terms of how society has changed. If she is say in her 80’s she’d be from the generation, who would get a clip round the ear from a police officer. She’d also be of the sort of age that when she when a mother with a toddler it was more common for a more experienced person from an older generation to approach a child in this manner.

Does it matter, I’ve had many an older person interfering when my kids have had tantrums, occasionally annoying if they tried speaking to them but they were only being nice and trying to help and as most of Them told me they’d been there themselves.