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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To complain about what teachers wear?

178 replies

Bunchofdaffodils · 22/09/2018 07:03

More is she being unreasonable? Visiting a friend the other day with a daughter in year 5 I think. Just moved to a new school ( New to area).
My friend suddenly went on a rant about how it wasn’t on what the teachers were wearing and should she say something about it being inappropriate? Apparently it’s things like short skirts(other parents have commented about seeing Miss Xs knickers!), high heels and being over the top, like a fashion show.
She thinks it’s not a good example to set the children? Was she being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Allthewaves · 23/09/2018 10:42

Out nursery attached to the scool wear school polo's and trousers. Teacher actually implemented it because she was sick of paint and gunk over her clothes.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 23/09/2018 10:46

Let’s hope none of them have eczema then and can wear horrible scratchy polyester.

NoLightInTheTunnel · 23/09/2018 17:21

My DD's Y3 teacher used to wear skintight leggings/very short skirts, with low cut blouses showing lots of cleavage, and flip flops. I thought it was totally inappropriate.

Marie0 · 23/09/2018 17:24

I think you should focus on what really matters i.e whether the teacher is doing a good job rather than her clothing choices

Angelil · 23/09/2018 17:54

As a secondary school teacher myself I try to apply the same rule to myself as I'd apply to the students. If you can see up, down, or through it, it's not appropriate.
Apart from that, I'd say anything goes.

PlinkPlink · 23/09/2018 17:56

When I did my teacher training we were told 'No boobs, no tums, no bums'. Which I found a little condescending but hey, I guess not everyone knows. Everything else should be fine as long as it's smart and professional.

I got pulled up in one of my observations for wearing jewellery. I was wearing a chunky bracelet and some hoop earrings.

I found it fucking ridiculous. I was dressed smartly. I had a knee length skirt and tights. High top on and a cardi. I found it a completely irrelevant point as to how it impacted my teaching... how, precisely, is criticising my choice of accessories going to help me get a difficult group of Year 9's to actually listen to what I was saying? If I wore no jewellery, they would still be pissing about (I hasten to add this was in my first term of teacher training so I was not confident at all - that was why they weren't listening).

YearOfYouRemember · 23/09/2018 18:04

Don't be ridiculous again .......hen.. Men don't generally wear clothes that show their penises or arses to work

Polarbearflavour · 23/09/2018 18:08

I do reading in primary a school via Beanstalk...the female teachers all look like they dress in White Stuff / Sea Salt. And so do I! Grin

lemonadefloat · 23/09/2018 18:08

Good lord isn't a teacher's job hard enough without all this. They are adults and should wear what they want.

RainbowGlitterFairy · 23/09/2018 18:16

If you can see her knickers its not appropriate for school, especially primary school as you are likely to bend over a lot more than at secondary.

I wear leggings if I am wearing a skirt to school so I don't have to worry about accidental flashing and so I can cross my legs on the carpet, I also wear a vest after realising that a lot of tops that look fine when you are stood up flash a bit of boob when you are leaning over tables/tying up shoe laces.

Cantusethatname · 23/09/2018 18:17

Before I left, the women had taken to wearing bodycon dresses

Why would you do that in a school full of adolescent boys?

MaisyPops · 23/09/2018 18:21

Why would you do that in a school full of adolescent boys?
Why would the presence of adolescent boys make the slightest difference to a female member of staff's attire? I assume you're also of the view that girls shouldn't have short school skirts in case the boys get distracted?
Confused

Body con can be anything from super tight form fitting sexually alluring dresses to boring jersey pencil skirts that are made of stretchy fabric.

Like many secondary teachers, I wear jersey pencil skirts to work. They're perfectly professional. The idea I shouldn't wear a pencil skirt because a boy might think of sex is ridiculous.

Spotify · 23/09/2018 18:21

I work in a SEN secondary and there is no way I'd wear anything too revealing. It's bad enough when you are fully covered! I'd imagine mainstream secondary is much the same but the inappropriate language is less out there! As much as I agree that teachers should be able to wear what they decide to within reason. They should be sensible and be aware of the hormones flying around. I think it's pretty unfair for a 15 year old boy to have to juggle between looking at a teachers bits or the whiteboard!
Marie, I agree but hey, these kids are not 30 something women with kids! I am sure they'd agree once they are old enough!

Embracethechaos · 23/09/2018 18:24

My dh works in a school and complains to me that his female colleges don't stick to the dress code. Male teachers in my mums school have to wear full suits whereas female dress code is more relaxed. It's pretty unfair in the heat.

TatterdemalionAspie · 23/09/2018 18:29

I think that children should learn that there is a difference between being a child and being an adult.

Well I agree entirely with that, @midnitescribbler, but I don't think the best way to do that is to insist that students have to conform to a strict dress code while teachers wear stuff that would be more suited to an evening out (bodycon dresses with high heels, shirts and trousers so tight that they outline cock and balls) or the stuff that students will be penalised for (jeans, trainers, pink hair or whatever). Surely either everyone in the school has to adhere to a professional-style dress code and look smart, or the rule is pointlessly arbitrary and unlikely to be respected by the students?

Amaaaazing · 23/09/2018 18:29

I teach in secondary school. I think a sensible dress code is absolutely necessary for everyone. My school is strict. I wear knee length skirts/dresses and my cleavage is absolutely not out. I would be mortified if I had teenage students going home and saying they could see right down my top. Sorry, but would be distracting and unprofessional.

I certainly don’t conform to a boring grey suit though. I wear Monsoon workwear or Next or a mix. It is possible to be an individual and not look like you are going clubbing.

Used to work in a primary school...definitely lots of leggings, short skirts and plunging tops there.

The only thing I don’t agree with is not being allowed to wear sleeveless dresses. Plenty of professional work dresses that are not spaghetti straps/casual/reavealing.

katseyes7 · 23/09/2018 18:29

l'm 60 next weekend. So when l was at infant and junior school in the 1960s, l remember young teachers wearing miniskirts.
Having said that, a friend of mine is a first school teacher, and she wears trousers/combats for school, mainly because they're comfortable and don't show anything.
l'm sure if anything's inappropriate, it's up to the head to raise the issue.

Obi73 · 23/09/2018 18:37

As a primary headteacher I receive many personal comments about staff and their choice of clothing. Professionally, I’m more interested in the teaching and learning going on rather than the fashion sense of my staff and I try to make sure the parents understand that, as politely as I possibly can. 🙄

OlennasWimple · 23/09/2018 18:42

Midnite - we live on a small tropical island now Smile The teachers all wear smart casual, with the men tending towards chinos and open necked shirts, and the women wearing palazzo or cropped trousers and a cotton top, or simple dresses. Perhaps it's because it's actually cooler to cover up than wear skimpy clothes, but the teachers here show far less flesh than the various other schools my DC have attended (UK and elsewhere)

PlinkPlink · 23/09/2018 18:45

Ugh... jeans in a professional job like teaching? No, I don't think so... not for me. If I turned up to a job interview wearing jeans I would fully expect not to get the job.

This is probably because I had it drilled into me by my grandparents that jeans were a definite no-no for interviews and performances (I sing and play the piano).

LaurieMarlow · 23/09/2018 19:00

This is probably because I had it drilled into me by my grandparents that jeans were a definite no-no for interviews and performances

This is so dependent on the job in question. In my industry (professional/creative) jeans would be fine in the context of a nice/stylish outfit.

A suit would be a no-no because it would show you don't 'get' the industry and its norms.

Tomatoesrock · 23/09/2018 19:00

I wouldn't expect teachers to wear a suit even though they're professionals. Smart and casual sets a more comfortable environment.

As long their boobs or balls are not on display, I could nott care and would encourage my DC to look away if they caught a glimpse of boob. Mind you my DC have seen my cleavage a few times I'm sure they'll be fine.

simiisme · 23/09/2018 19:39

Some people on here would hate me - I wear loud patterned floral, animal-print, novelty-print dresses on a daily basis. Matching jewellery, too. I like to look cheerful and the students either ignore it or find it cheerful too. I do not show cleavage or wear anything short - it's hard to maintain discipline if teenagers can see your butt cheeks or acres of cleavage. My hair was pink at the start of term, but is fading back to its natural silver-grey. I don't wear makeup, but some teachers do and good for them.
I admire female staff who can wear stilettos all day - although I do notice that they can be a bit more scary and shouty than those of us who wear comfy flats :D
P.S. Comments about strict uniform policy for the students and none for the teachers? That's because we're adults, not students. A friend and colleague who was late twice last week is on a disciplinary hearing; if they were a student, they'd only have had to 'pay back' that time at lunch (a whole 6 minutes in their case) So some things are, and should be, different for adults.

manicmij · 23/09/2018 20:26

Know of kids secondary schools that have a unform and one with dress as you please codes. The parents of the dress as you please find it a nightmare. Son feels he has to keep up with all the trends which is expensive. For out of school he has other clothes too. He is not alone with this, most other parents feel the same. Even the 15 year old girl thinks it is madness not having a uniform as this "levels everyone and she can then dress up a bit when going out. Their opinion is that staff should adopt a smart, casual almost uniform style. In fact one even questioned why school staff don't have a uniform too like emergency services, hospital staff at least in secondary. As they say the staff are there to do a job, not have a fashion show. Some schools still insist teachers wear robes, at least the hates seem to have disappeared. I would ask the head teacher if the school has a staff dress code before thinking of making a complaint.

PlinkPlink · 23/09/2018 20:27

@LaurieMarlow

I get that. Times are totally changing. And the fact aswell that actually there's alot more choice of denim these days and different cuts. I think it can look smart definitely.
Pair a nice dark blue jegging with a nice blazer and some boots. Lovely.

I just can't get my grandparents voice out of my head though 😂 I couldn't wear it to an interview unless I was told to wear smart casual. They're both gone now as well so I feel like they'd be watching over me and tutting 😂