To think I'm not bolshy

[tryingtotakeitonboard]

So... wanting someone to settle an argument between me and DH.
DH has said that I’m bolshy and constantly on the war path with someone or another.
I think that I’m sticking up for myself and my family.
Just to clarify I never shout or swear or cause a scene, I feel I’m just confident and matter of fact.
A few examples...
Bought an object from a shop, got it home and it didn’t work. I took it back and got an exchange.
DH said he would have just chalked it up as one of those things and bought a new one.
DD had a medical issue. I felt that no one was listening or taking me seriously. I complained and got second opinions and they helped her with her issue.
DH said that doctors know best and I shouldn’t have thrown my weight around.
DH family member had carers visiting him for 2 hours a day. We found out they were doing 15 minutes and leaving. I complained to their head office and they rectified and sent new carers who stayed for the time they were paid for. DH said it was just one of those things and we were just unlucky so should have stuck with it until head office realised they were taking the piss and stepped in themselves.
We went to a restaurant and when the bill came they had double charged us for an item. I bought it up and they bought out the correct bill. DH said it was one of those things and not worth causing a scene over (a scene being a quiet word with the waiter)
I think he gets embarrassed when I stick up for myself or my family.
He would rather be ripped off or treated unfairly and not say anything or cause a scene or atmosphere.
Who is being unreasonable?

That’s not being bolshy, that’s just sorting stuff out when it needs sorting. Why does your husband think you are on war path? Sounds like he doesn’t like any confrontation.

You are acting appropriately and assertively and your DH is a doormat. I would find his attitude infuriating. His comments to you are also undermining and disempowering. If he wants to be a doormat then that’s his call but he shouldn’t be requiring it of you. His “embarrassment” about what sound like perfectly normal interactions is his issue, not yours.

Its one of those irregular verbs

I stand up for myself
You are bolshy
He's an aggressive twat

You are assertive, he is a doormat. I think you should start calling him on his massive passiveness as he does on your assertiveness.

I'm more like DH just quietly avoid saying anything to anyone. I wish I was a lot more bolshy to be honest. It's not like you're trying to take more than your fair share you just want what you're owed.