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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think life shouldn’t be easier for those on benefits than those who work?

605 replies

Alwaysoverdrawn · 21/09/2018 16:19

obviously not including the disabled, elderly etc in this

I am so fed up of being poor so I looked into doing an access course to increase my earning potential. My sister is doing one and is currently on benefits, she gets it for free with her childcare paid.

Having spoken to them, we earn too much to be considered for help. Having looked into mine and my sisters finances I think this is frankly bloody ridiculous. We are worse off than her ffs.

We make around £2,500 NET p/m, £1000 rent, £900 childcare -2 adults, 2 kids. So £600 ‘disposable’ pm with a lot of debts to pay.

She gets £670pm plus her full rent paid and a council tax reduction for her and one child.

AIBU to think life shouldn’t be ‘easier’ for those on benefits than those who work?

DP hasn’t been to the dentist despite needing to for years as he can’t afford treatment, I’m really down today. Seriously considering moving out so that I can claim benefits and get out of this horrible rut.

OP posts:
Belina · 23/09/2018 00:57

I was broke on benefits never had money ever and got into debt because if it
I work now and am a lot better off

CantankerousCamel · 23/09/2018 05:46

Apparent from her behaviour toward the OP on this thread yeah?

malificent7 · 23/09/2018 06:03

Op...if you divorce your dh, sell your house, cut your hours to 16 you too will be entitled to benefits and can gave the oh so luxurious life that these single mum's have who you clearly envy.
This thread is basically a dig at single mum's right so why don't you aspire to be one?

malificent7 · 23/09/2018 06:09

If you choose to have a mortgage then hard work is part of the bargain as you cannot claim housing benefit with a mortgage.
So sell up and rent if you resent working for your own property...GET yourself on that housing list.
As a home owner you are in a much better financial position than your single mum friends in social housing...and you know it.

malificent7 · 23/09/2018 06:10

Sorry op...just saw you rent.

CantankerousCamel · 23/09/2018 06:52

Did you manage to read anything else the OP has said after your frothing?

It’s bugger all to do with bashing people on benefits

BackBoiler · 23/09/2018 07:07

Its the childcare thats doing you here! Eye watering!!!

tillytop · 23/09/2018 07:21

I see Malificent7 put her alarm on for 6am to come back and spit out more venom. Then had to apologise!!!!Grin

Gin96 · 23/09/2018 07:25

I know a lady who had 2 horses on benefits but often didn’t pay her livery bill on time. She had terrible mental health issues, the horses kept her sane

tillytop · 23/09/2018 07:25

In the first 100 posts on this thread, 8 were deleted. Says it all, doesn't it?

tillytop · 23/09/2018 07:36

the oh so luxurious life that these single mum's have who you clearly envy. So clear, it's bloody invisible!! Do get some therapy for your bitterness, projecting, delusions. It's getting boring.

tillytop · 23/09/2018 07:51

Correction> out of the first 70 posts, 8 were deleted. Again, says it all.

tillytop · 23/09/2018 07:59

The amount of bitterness, deliberate misconstruing and lies on this thread has been one of the worst I've seen. Well done MN's. Biscuit Biscuit Biscuit

Larasshadow · 23/09/2018 08:09

I can kinda see where you are coming from OP. When my husband was on a lower wage and I wasn't working there was no way we could afford to pay for things that some people are entitled to get for free. I didn't get my prescriptions as I couldn't afford the charge, couldn't afford school dinners every day of the week. DD would have loved the music lessons but we had to say no. We are in a better place now, but when we were struggling it was easy to feel jealous of the people who got all that for free (as well as who must have had high paid jobs with massive disposable incomes)

tillytop · 23/09/2018 08:18

Sorry you had to go through this shit OP, especially when you were already feeling down yesterday.Flowers Some of us did read your posts properly though and I see Camel put up a brilliant fight against the "nest of vipers." I went off to watch bloodthirsty zombie films, which were actually less nasty than this thread. Grin

tillytop · 23/09/2018 08:26

It was easy to feel jealous of the people who got all that for free. OMFG, the OP is NOT feeling jealous!!! I give up, Camel has a lot more stamina than me! Back to the horror movies for me, they're less idiotic!!

Original poster
Alwaysoverdrawn · 23/09/2018 08:44

gluteustothemaximus you put it well, except you haven’t read what I’ve said. Your sentiment is right.. ‘how lovely that if you can’t afford dinners we have a system that will pay for it.’ I 100% agree, however my point is that some working people can’t afford school dinners, prescriptions, dentistry, courses etc... however there’s no support for us because we can’t ‘tick the benefits box’
I am not bashing benefits, I am not saying benefits should be reduced, I have never once mentioned anyone ‘playing the system’
I have never bashed single mums either, I don’t know where people are getting these assumptions from?

OP posts:
AamdC · 23/09/2018 08:56

I think your missing the point Gluteus its gteat you can afford school dinners prescriptions, swimming lessons etc, but alot of people on low wages or even the squeezed midfle cant and their kids miss our

AamdC · 23/09/2018 09:04

And actually depending on circumstances malificent people are not necessarily better off financiallt. In a mortgaged property than social gousing , i had a morrgage i bought wben i was single a shitty newbuild two bed apartment with no stoeage space etc, i gor martied had two kids due to prices rocketing we coyldnt afford to move anyway due to circumstances im now in a council house loads of storage. , own garden etc , and i dont have to worry about my boiler or anything breaking down .

BanginChoons · 23/09/2018 09:05

OP, as i said earlier, you can do an access course through Stonebridge using the Advanced Learner Loan to pay for it. What is it you would like to study?

Larasshadow · 23/09/2018 09:06

tillytop

It was easy to feel jealous of the people who got all that for free.OMFG, the OP is NOT feeling jealous!!! I give up,Camelhas a lot more stamina than me! Back to the horror movies for me, they're less idiotic!!

.....

I didn't say the OP was jealous, I said I was! I was in a bad place back then struggling on one small wage just above the threshold to get help with the things we couldn't afford.

CantankerousCamel · 23/09/2018 09:45

Sorry Larissa I think so many people have taken it upon themselves to kick the op when she’s down that it’s all a bit fraught.

I had exactly the same from many of the same people for not wanting to spend

Darkestnight · 23/09/2018 10:33

When a post is made up of people benefit bashing and saying how it's not fair we're working we cannot get x y or z ofc I'm going to say my piece as I'm fed up off hearing it and camel I hardly think I've taken up the post about my plight. All I see is you going on and on at anyone who disagrees with you or op. Now take it up with the government and FYI its hard to get certain benefits and now I've said my piece. Have ago at the tax dodgers they cost more than anyone on benefits. Have a good Sunday because I am Grin

AamdC · 23/09/2018 10:37

Darkestnight i am also a carer my child is disabled i had to give up work that doesnt mean i cant sympathise with the op . because i have also been in het pisition , ear to much to get any help but to litttle tp be able to afford things .

Darkestnight · 23/09/2018 10:39

And FYI I have not stagnated on benefits I'm proud of the way my disabled dd has come on and that's all thanks to me. Like the carers worker at the job center said justast week to me. I am a valuable member of society and my contribution in my care is second to none. So I'm proud I am contributing to society and even more proud of my dd