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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is BU? Us or the eBay seller?

30 replies

PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 16:58

My wife and I recently bought some Lego on eBay for our son’s birthday.
When it failed to arrive my wife chased it up and the seller gave us the tracking details, which stated they had tried to deliver and had left a card.
The courier then apparently tried again but didn’t tell us or leave a card, so eventually the Lego was sent back to the seller.
The seller then told us we would have to pay for Royal Mail delivery.... when we checked the original listing it stated that this was how he was sending it!
We decided that we were not confident in the seller as he had taken many days to respond each time and his messages had been quite rude, whereas my wife has been unstinting polite (I am not half as polite so she has been dealing with it!)
So yesterday morning we said not to resend and please refund.
In the meantime we ordered another set for our son.
This afternoon he messaged to say he has sent it!
My wife is in a panic, I think it will get sorted one way or another.
But who is BU? Or are we all?

OP posts:
Thisgirlcant · 20/09/2018 17:04

Sounds like it was a cockup with the delivery. I don't think any of you wbu. You get two sets of Lego, couldn't you give one as a gift to someone.
I wouldn't panic over it.

LittleOwl153 · 20/09/2018 17:04

I would just stick in a refund request to ebay and let them sort. Especially if he is asking you to repay to resend. No guarantee he has unless he has sent you the new tracking anyway.

SleepWarrior · 20/09/2018 17:07

I don't think you can blame the seller for the terrible courier and wanting to resend it. You had bought the Lego after all. And wanting a refund does normally have to happen at your own expense, postage-wise. But I can see why you'd want to take advantage of it landing back at the sellers house and ask for the refund.

Not sure who is at fault really. What do eBay rules say? Has anyone started a dispute?

KlutzyDraconequus · 20/09/2018 17:09

you bougjt it, they sent it.
its not their fault you werent in when courier tried to deliver.
not their fault it got returned.
dont see what royal mail or courier has tondo with it?
unless you refuse to open the door for anyone but royal mail.

id say the sellers has been fairly reasonable to be honest.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:10

Thisgirl I think the courier is definitely at fault.

It’s £60 which we wouldn’t spend on anyone else, and a fairly niche set.
But we could sell one on.
I’m asking the second seller if she would refund.

Obviously I think HIBU as he didn’t send via Royal Mail signed for as stated on the listing and he tried to make us pay for redelivery, both of which are against eBay rules I think.

Little that’s a good point, I will ask my wife but she isn’t confident in him after how rude his replies have been and how long he took to respond to every message.

OP posts:
Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:13

The courier didn’t even tell us that they had tried to deliver! They lied about leaving a card, twice.
eBay state that in the case of redelivery the seller should pay.
We prefer RM as then we get our post, we have had trouble with lots of couriers hence buying one which said they would send via RM

OP posts:
Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:14

No dispute started yet, we wanted to sort it amicably tbh.

OP posts:
Thatstheendofmytether · 20/09/2018 17:14

How do you know he didn't send it royal mail signed for? If it wasn't to be signed for they would have probably left it with a neighbour so the fact they took it away and tried to deliver a second time and then sent it back to the seller suggests it was sent a a sign for package.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:17

That’s - Because he gave us the courier details when we tracked it. We have had issues with this courier before.

OP posts:
Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:19

We asked him to tell the courier to leave it with our preferred neighbour if we were not in but they didn’t do this either. Our postie is great so would prefer RM every time

OP posts:
IsAnyoneElseMissingCheese · 20/09/2018 17:20

If it says RM then it should be RM. Pretty sure that's part of the eBay rules.

If it's Hermes then he's gotten it cheaper from them and pocketed the difference. Chancer.

HIBU. I'd just get a dispute open and let eBay sort it. Hope you get a set in the end!!

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:23

IsIt it’s not Hermes! I thought it would be but it’s another one. I think the same thing that he went for a cheaper courier to save money.
Hopefully eBay can help, but I said to my wife that the priority is getting the set for our son, everything will be sorted somehow.

OP posts:
Noodledoodledoo · 20/09/2018 17:29

I had this from a seller point of view, I sent something correctly addressed but the courier company tried to deliver to a completely different address - twice! It was only due to a helpful postlady that it got to the right location on the second attempt after it came back to me.

As the seller I got the second delivery charge refunded to me plus compensation so apart form the parcel taking longer to be delivered the buyers were not out of pocket.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 17:31

Thanks Noodle. We feel that the courier should pay back but the seller didn’t agree with us. What a mess!

OP posts:
Creeper8 · 20/09/2018 18:39

I had this recently. item sent back. he refused to refund and ebay sided with him so i lost my money and item!

Creeper8 · 20/09/2018 18:41

even though the item tracking said returned to sender ebay wouldnt refund!

Beargoesgrr · 20/09/2018 18:46

YABU- you changed your mind because you weren’t in for the delivery. Don’t be a cheekyfucker and accept that the Lego has now been received.

Why should the seller be inconvenienced because you missed the delivery twice?

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 19:33

Beargoes we were never notified of delivery otherwise we would have picked up from the depot or rearranged delivery.
The seller lied about sending RM which if he had done so from the start we wouldn’t be in this predicament.
Also we asked for a refund since he wanted us to pay more postage when he used the wrong courier and they messed up.

OP posts:
Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 19:33

Plus he has taken weeks to sort this out

OP posts:
Alwa · 20/09/2018 19:37

To be honest I think you're clutching at straws to keep saying it's because he didn't sent it Royal Mail signed for. Which you'd have been out for anyway.

I think he's done the right thing resending it. If you open a case and it shows the courier tried to deliver twice there's a high chance you'll lose.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 19:46

Alwa thanks for your pov.
I think he broke eBay rules by not sending RM (we always get parcels delivered by RM or at least the card to collect so it definitely makes a difference) and we asked for a refund, which he then ignored. We’ll see what eBay says I guess

OP posts:
afishnotabird · 20/09/2018 19:54

I've cancelled eBay orders because they stated it would be sent RM and wasn't. I live in an awkward set of flats and am out during the day and the only guaranteed way to get a parcel delivered is by the postie taking it back to the delivery office where I can collect it.

The occasions I've cancelled the seller has agreed a refund so I've never had to use eBay to fight it, but would have been prepared to. You paid for a service you did not receive.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 20:02

Thanks afish. I’m not entirely sure of our rights and it’s not my account so I am going to chat with my wife - I just hope he’s not actually resent it!

OP posts:
sockunicorn · 20/09/2018 20:04

i would send it back to him at your cost (you can claim it back from paypal so neither of you loses out) and get a refund.

Original poster
PeachMelba78 · 20/09/2018 20:08

Sock what if he says no?
I used to sell on eBay many years ago and sometimes I got postage wrong and paid more than I thought I would have to but it was my fault so I sucked it up.
My wife is annoyed as it’s been around 3 weeks and he takes 3-5 days to respond to her polite messages. We still have a couple of weeks before my son’s birthday but it’s been going on too long!

OP posts: