To NOT pay for adult DD to go abroad?

[OllieRhys]

She's 22 and wants to do a volunteering program abroad (she's an unemployed graduate).

We can afford it (my husband and I) - it's £6,000 for 6 months.

She hasn't asked us, just expressed a huge interest. DH thinks we absolutely should pay for it. I personally think at 22 she should get a job and save.

Thanks.

"odd she has no job at all at age 22"

my dd is 22- she graduated this summer and hasn't got a job yet- i don't think that's odd......

Depends what kind of volunteering and how necessary it is to her future career/job prospects.

This, absolutely. Which would require a good deal of caution in choosing a programme.

It also depends on your husband’s reasoning.
My SD is 22 and looking for job after graduation.
If she wanted to do a volunteer programme just because it sounded fun... well, she’s 22, we could afford that, and she likely has many years ahead of her tied to work.
So actually - I might think, yeah, sod it - why not?

there are lots of volunteering opportunities in the uk. she can do that and save a fortune on flights and travel insurance.

What does expresses interest mean? If she’s seen it and mused aloud “oooh, that sounds awesome”, that’s one thing. If she’s an entitled madam dropping hints cos she just expects you too pay - rude awakening is due

It's relevant to the job she'd like.

I'm 22, worked my bum off since I left school between college and uni. I graduated summer 2017 and worked full time for a year and a bit, I started my first graduate job last week and managed to save 6k in that time to go towards a deposit for a house. I'm not naturally clever and I certainly haven't had it easy. What's her excuse?

If she's lucky enough that her parents are able to help her out and are willing, maybe you could offer to match what she saves. You can't just hand it to her on a silver platter. God the thought of taking that off my parents for nothing knocks me abit sick

Nope, she should get a job and pay for it, or at least for most of it.

Is she not interested in a volunteering programme in her own community?

It might be relevant, but will it actually open doors? Has she done her research?

It's relevant to the job she'd like.

Is it so unusual that she couldn't possibly do the same or similar volunteer work in this country, I highly doubt it.

She really needs to start looking for jobs not wasting 6 months volunteering, she really cannot be expecting to live off her parents generosity.

Get a job and save, that's what I did when I went travelling when I was 21.
I did get the plane ticket but it was my 21st birthday present and I wasn't expecting it.
(My brother is 4 years older than me and had the same amount of money spent on his 21st)

She should look at this instead, and if accepted the onto the scheme has to prove she has fundraised to participate.
www.volunteerics.org/volunteers-uk

No, she needs to get a job and learn the true value of money.
The Bank of Mum and Dad, won't always be open.
If she saves, and shows willing, then I would reconsider.

We're in a similar situation. DS1 has announced he doesn't want to get a job after finishing his Masters and will go travelling instead because Mum, your 20's are for having fun not working. I can work the rest of my life

Fine, we say. How very nice. Go travelling darling and have a great time.

But the minute he stops full time education, he also stops getting the living allowance we give him as a student (and the phone contract, new laptop and the bus pass we sub etc etc). He has known this will be the deal since he was small and agrees it's fair but I have a feeling the reality of the value of money is something you need to actually live to properly understand how hard you have to work to earn enough for a flight ticket.

If your dd had to pay for her own volunteering trip she'd very soon work out if it was really something worthwhile to do. If daddy keeps buying her expensive holidays volunteering opportunities she will never work out what matters to her.

What is the volunteering saying it is relevant is fine but is it a gap year jolly or is it an actual opportunity ? Not that it would matter to me because I would still expect mine to contribute

it sounds like an exciting opportunity especially if it will help her future career.

A good idea would be for your daughter to work and save some money towards the cost and you donate the rest. You'll probably be giving most of the money but you say you can afford it.

Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected my parents to pay for a trip like this at age 22. She's an adult and is perfectly capable of getting a bar/waiting/shop/whatever job. I assume she lives rent free with you already? Surely that is your contribution.

Oh, and the money I'd saved got me a three month holiday, I worked for the rest of the two years I was away.

I agree with those saying meet half way, seems like a fair compromise

I would probably pay for half and loan her the other half, on the condition she pays it back when she gets a job, once she gets home.

If she can save £2000, I'd stump up the £4000.

I'd want her to do it if it's relevant to future employment prospects but I'd want some meaningful financial input at that age.

Why not i am sure she will learn a lot and it gives her something worthwhile to put on her cv.

I would pay for something that was going to be an essential stepping stone in her career (e.g. masters course) but if it was just going to be a lovely experience then no. I do think having everything paid for means you appreciate the efforts of your labour less.

If you can afford it, then I would tell her that if she raises £3K you will match it. She should be able to do that in a few months if she really sets her mind to it.